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Trending blog entries
So many reasons, too many to list, but i have. It goes back and forth real quickly. Want to force numbness, have to be perfect, self harm urges, not good enough my fault need to just try harder. Will lose everything if i'm not good enough. All my fault no one elses blame others too much when its...
Today bubba, the almost two year old i babysit, was sick so that pretty much totally reset me for the day. As much as that kid can really rattle my nerves sometimes, I love him and it brings out the protective mothering side of me seeing him so miserable. I get a much needed day off tomorrow...
Lately I have been working with several of my neighbors regarding conditions in the trailer park and in doing so am getting a crash course in trailer park activism. The first thing I have learned is that trailer parks exist in a sort of legal limbo. Much of the resources available to other...
I feel like I found a group of people I can relate to. I used to feel like I was the only person with this disorder, and I felt that the world was against me, but not anymore.
All the supervisors save one are the strict, serious type that i can't read at all. Even if i get complimented four times in one weekend by customers even one mistake in front of them makes me feel like i'm back to square one. Bubba, the almost two year old i babysit, his parents want to put him...
Imagine having moods that change every 2-4 hrs so 4-6 times daily. The moods create heavenly ecstasy, severe
to moderate depression,anxiety,severe tiredness,deep brain fog,irritability and so much more in any imaginable
combination. Days off make it much easier since you can let it flow without...
Having someone telling me publishing odds is not why I write blog posts and only infuriates me even more. I know that there are a lot of things that are brutal about this world today. I don't even give a damned if I SELL my book, I might just make it visible to the public right where it sits on...
The other day I had a conversation with an artist from my church that has left me in doubt as to whether I should continue my art--or whether I am heading down a road to heartbreak. But then, again, SHE may be heading down the road to heartbreak as well.
She was selling calendars featuring...
I had an intake appointment for my anxiety this morning. It was pretty disappointing. I brought up the possibility of having Asperger's and she didn't seem to know what it was. She told me that I'd probably have to go see my regular medical doctor to get screened for it. I must have looked...
I was really happy and optimistic out of the blue this morning for a few hours yet all of a sudden, just cause of one episode of criminal minds and a few renditions of "Had Enough" by Breaking Benjamin, i'mat the total other extreme. Sleepy, irritable, extremely self-analytical. The 'nothing is...
I had a meltdown last night. I haven't had one for years. I think it might have been a combination of the stress from Monday, the anticipated anxiety of today, and my 4-year-old screaming for lemonade for the last 20 minutes straight even though he had milk and water and we were riding in the...
I took some of those online Aspie tests. They were interesting, but I had some issues with some of the questions. I know I was over-thinking it, but some of them weren't specific enough, or were too specific, or had multiple behaviors in one question, but I only do one of them and not the...
Yesterday, I went to an Asperger's group that I found on Meetup.com. I had been a member of the group for a couple of months now and finally worked up the courage to go.
I was very disappointed. 7 people, other than the counselor, showed up. Two were the mothers of some AS young men (19 and...
There was a celebrity chef (I believe it was Steven Raichlen of Barbecue Bible fame) who, when asked his advice about starting a restaurant, had only three words to say about it: Don't, don't, don't.
But, he went on, if you simply must go ahead and do it, here are some pointers. This is what...
The other day I got a flyer in the mail advertising a church carnival. It's from one of the newer area churches, one probably very much like the one I spent three years in. It promises fun, games, music. Come as you are, everyone welcome.
Now, maybe I am a bit old-fashioned and showing my...
Robert Frost's poem on the "Road Less Traveled" has been quoted so often it has become a cliche. Yet when I look over my life I see how much truth there is in that poem. Except that I didn't choose to take the road less traveled, it just happened.
I've been away from Aspies Central for...
I am in the progress of being diagnosed with Asperger's. Today was the first day, that a professional thought that I am on the Autism Spectrum- even though I have had an idea that I am for awhile now.
I have been dealing with an issue regarding my hypersensitivity that results in visuals...
How can anyone get over sexual abuse? especially child sexual abuse.... how can those who have never been through it say just to "get over it?" they have no idea how much being violated like that affects your entire being, right down to the bone, right down to the very core of your soul. My...
Sometimes, just sometimes, I wonder if I should date. Just becouse sometimes I feel that giving your best to the other person and trying to be a team must be fun.
And yeah its easyer too, becouse you have someone that is there anitime to hear you... but then this comes to my mind.
You have God...
Yay, my first blog! That settled, today when I was going to the Movie Theater on my campus, I couldn't get a ticket because they only accepted cash, the ATMs only printed 20s, and I only had 2.05 on my debit card (ಠ_ಠ). However, there was this extremely generous man who saw me in my dilema and...