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Blogs

  1. Day 4: I been sleeping more

    i think one of my problems in the past was me not sleepin enough. I have been working hard to fix that. i have put my screens on all yellow light before going to bed, reading before going to bed. i think this is helping my mood a lot. i cant stay up because my cat always wakes me up at 7am. the only thing i wish i could do is block the window so no light comes in. yesterday i also didnt need to smoke to go to sleep. that was good. i had a dream that i was a werewolf and i intimiated a...
  2. Day 3: Things kinda feel different

    I am thankful that this week is less stressful. for a few months, i've been in this depressive episode. i think i am still there but i feel i am near a silver lining. Right now I feel positive about myself in that I am beginning to believe i am worth something. the problem i really do have is that i am afraid i dont really believe that. I write that because I am back with my bf, and I am sure that has something to do with my self-worth. I don't like that. My ex now bf basically admitted to...
  3. Day 2: My hobbies

    Today I feel less nervous. I feel less nervous because i am not waiting on someone anymore. in a way it's freeing. but everyday is scary, in the sense that i dont know what will set me off into a depressive moment. (i accidentally posted this too early) Today I'm going to talk about my hobbies. I feel i am a creative person. i like to work with my hands, but not like the sense of a mechanic, although i do respect that skill. it is very attractive to see someone know how to fix things. I...
  4. Day 1: Three Good Things About Me

    I am a youngish woman. I have struggled with friendship my entire life, and that is not a hyperbole. Right now, I am very alone. I moved from my home town almost two years ago, and have failed to make friends, failed to maintain my romantic relationship, and even failing at my job. It feels like there is nothing to look forward to nowadays, because no one cares about me, or at least that is what the voices in my head tell me repeatedly. Here I, today, I will write a few reasons why i AM...
  5. The hunt for friendships online

    Quick info on me before we start: I'm housebound more or less due to my social issues, panic attacks etc and i'm classed as disabled so i can't socialise in person very well at all, but i'm fairly okay online. I've been searching for ways to make friends online, I'm an extremely friendly guy who loves to chat casually however i'm not the best at keeping up conversations unless it's a certain topic like gaming, anime. I'm sure others can relate to struggling to make conversation unless it's...
  6. Feast of Our Lady of Sorrows

    This will probably be my last blog post for awhile, and I may even be taking a break from this site as a whole for a bit; until I get into the swing of work and university this season. I wanted to do an entry for Our Lady's Nativity on September 8th, but have been unable to do so due to my difficulties to get everything in order for work and university. September 15th is a of Our Lady under Her title of Our Lady of Sorrows, and the primary aspect of this devotion is the Seven Sorrows of Our...
  7. Been a while! Love is complicated.

    Hey all i haven't been around for a long while as i've been trying to sort my life out a bit, Unfortunately i keep going in circles with something good happening, then it falling through and i have to start over on things which hurts a lot, I recently had a date and everything and i thought it went okay but it seems the girl wasn't quite ready for a relationship so we had to part ways, I'm suffering a lot with it currently because i did really like this girl But i'm not the type of guy to...
  8. I need your opinion on something! Comments are welcome!

    Good morning y'all! Today, my goal is to get to know you all a little better. So I have a question for you to comment below your personal opinion. I ask this with utmost respect and confessing I know very little about Aspies (I'm a BPD, and that's completely different). So my question is this: how do Aspies react when they see someone they like? It can be the first time they see them or it could be after some time of knowing them. What I want to know (to make a better and accurate...
  9. Mary and Veronica: A True Story of Forgiveness

    It's a long story but one day someone shared with me A True Story of Forgiveness, which came from this pamphlet by France Hogan([URL]https://www.franceshogan.com/Assets/books/Forgiveness.pdf[/URL]) It's been on my mind a lot, so I've decided to share it here on this blog: A TRUE STORY OF FORGIVENESS Before we bring our discussion to a close I would like to share with you the story of Veronica. It is a true story but the names and circumstances have been changed to protect the participants. It...
  10. The Assumption and Mono No Aware

    Our Lady of Akita August 15th marks the Feast of the Assumption, that is, the day Our Lady was assumed body and soul into Heaven. This is one of the Four Marian Dogmas of the Catholic Faith, it was infallibly defined by Pope Pius XII on November 1, 1950, in his apostolic constitution Munificentissimus Deus, the latest time to date that a Pope has exercised his infallibility. The belief that Our Lady was assumed body and soul into Heaven was held long before it was declared a dogma, as were...
  11. Zen Biscuits Podcast

    Under the moniker Zen Biscuits I've started putting up Buddhist text readings on YouTube and Podbean. Zen Biscuits on YouTube Zen Biscuits Podcast on Podbean Why am I doing this? Part of my training is to read through pages and pages of often obscure and strangely written Buddhist sutras (teachings), supposedly taught by the historical Buddha. I say 'supposedly' because this is somewhat in doubt, especially when it comes to the later texts, which are almost certainly fabrications meant to...
  12. I tried stimming: Tangle toys

    As I am typing this, I am trying to manage fidgeting with my tangle at the same time. If you have read my first post on this topic I tried stimming: Spinning rings, you probably know that this is not the first time I am trying to find a suitable stim toy for myself. You might also not be very hopeful that a tangle works for me, considering that a spinning ring did not do anything for me. But this seems to be different. I found out about Tangle creations online while I was researching...
  13. I yearn for those days

    I yearn for those days of my teen years. 2016 was a turning point. I had friends I could count on. It all fell apart in an instance. I miss that girl I would always talk to every day. The only person I ever truly fell in love with. Only she never felt the same. We stayed friends until it all fell apart. I had plenty of friends from those days. Friends from different parts of cliques. There was Skylar, Lane, and Connor who all decided to cut me off a year after high school. There was...
  14. Feast of Our Lady of the Snows and the Summertime of the Faith

    August 5th is the Feast of Our Lady of the Snows, it's also the Feast of Blessed Frederick Jansoone up here in Canada, but I don't know enough about him yet to talk about him. The Feast commemorates a Marian Miracle that occurred during the Pontificate of Pope Liberius; a Roman Patrician named John was without heir and so decided along with his wife, that they would donate their wealth in a way that would honour Our Lady. The two prayed to Our Lady, that She may show them how She would like...
  15. Banana & Pear Chocolate Fudge Pie

    (All measures in British Imperial) Pastry • 2 tbsp Icing Sugar • <6 oz Self-Raising Flour * I ditch the sugar in the measuring bowl, then weigh so both that and the flour together make 6 oz. • 3 oz Butter • Water > as per previous pastry instructions. Filling • 4 oz Butter, melted • 2 Eggs, whisked until even colour & consistency. > mix together with whisk • 5 oz Dark Brown Sugar • Sliced Vanilla Pod to taste > mix in • 1.5 oz Plain Flour • 1.5 oz Cocoa Powder > sift onto above, then fold...
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