Dating Corner

[Ragnahawk]

Cancel my request. I found the perfect female. DDDDDDDDDDDD
^ Not because of the thread. FYI. If you are unhappy with your situation go out and take risks like I did.

 

[LostInSilentHill]

Username: LostInSilentHill
Gender: Female
Age: 29
Sexuality: Heterosexual
Location: Calgary, Alberta, Canada
Religion: Christian
Politics: None, don't really care about politics
Philosophy: Live like you will die tomorrow, learn like you will live forever. Something along these lines, although actually living every day like you will die the next would be exhausting, it's more of a frame of mind thing.
Obsessions/Interests: Video games, Reading, Writing, Psychology, and Biology. My interests tend to change quite often, but these few always stay.
Desired Partner Characteristics: Someone who can take things slow, likes quiet activities, and is willing to understand and have patience.
Self-Description: I am a caring, patient woman who loves video games, horror, reading, writing, and nature (like the mountains). I am not very empathetic but I am quite analytical and although I may not be great emotional support, I can help navigate the problem and come up with solutions. If need be, I can offer some emotional support, but it may be stilted. I do have the best intention though. I don't work at the moment, though I do have financial support, so I'm not homeless or anything.

Also, I have never been in a relationship before. Ever. It takes time for me to trust someone, but it is something I do want. I'm not a fan of being touched by people until I know them, so please respect my boundaries, as I would yours.

 

[LostInSilentHill]

eventhough i'm straight, i have told myself for a long-ass time now, that I bet if I was born a girl, i would have had my first boyfriend, lost my virginity a long time ago

You say this, but as a 29 yr old female, I have never even been on a date, let alone had sex. Being female did not make my life easier and I often thought that being born a male would have been easier and I probably would have dated by now if I had been.

 

[Judge]

Autism makes socialization much more complex, whatever sex you are. Compounded by complex Neurotypical social rituals, with dating at the top of the list, IMO.

 

[pjcnet]

You say this, but as a 29 yr old female, I have never even been on a date, let alone had sex. Being female did not make my life easier and I often thought that being born a male would have been easier and I probably would have dated by now if I had been.

I think that in a culture where men are more expected to initially do the chasing it can sometimes be easier for a woman to get somewhere with the opposite sex to begin with (with modern times however some women chase too and it is more acceptable than it used to be), but I also think that many women who want a serious relationship are more likely to get hurt and deceived by men that are only truly after one thing, but will often convince them otherwise, especially more vulnerable women. In short it's no easier for a women to find a suitable loving relationship than it is for a man even if they sometimes get chased.

PS: Assuming your avatar is a photo of yourself, the way you look isn't the reason why you have never been on a date, perhaps you don't get involved in social environments.

Edit: Grammar correction.

 

[Daniel Chirgwin]

For those with the Asperger's Syndrome condition, love can be extremely hard to do properly, as finding the right person, and under the right circumstances, is nearly impossible. Something always seems to get in the way, whether it be some critical difference that makes a potential mate incompatible [religion, philosophy, your level of contact with them], them already being in a relationship [people often forget that the people who are considered "prime choices" are often already in a relationship, as you will rarely have been the one to have gotten there first], or more often than not, that at some point during the courtship, we mess it up due to the Aspie condition and they become turned off by us.

Therefore, I believe that a place should exist here, where everyone else understands the condition we have and its effects, because everyone either has it themselves, or at least is close to someone who does. While none of us came here specifically to pursue a relationship, having the option to if no other viable options are open to us, or if one simply prefers it over those that are, is a convenient and viable option for finding someone who you can form a successful relationship with, as opposed to the relatively-low chances that one would have in real life, due to most people one would meet not understanding the condition, simply attributing our actions to rudeness, poor manners, and so on and so forth [you all know the story].

Here is what I propose. I will make here a list of people seeking a relationship, as well as a template that people can fill out for themselves as a sort of mini profile that will have some basic information. If people see someone they like who is compatible with them by their sexuality and gender, then they can talk with that person a bit here, and then start a PM conversation with them to pursue a deeper relationship. This thread is still a work in progress, and so, I will take suggestions on ways I can improve it and make it more efficient [this, I know to of course be one of those words we aspies love to use].

Note: When filling out the template, if you don't feel comfortable giving a piece of information, then don't give it. Only give as much information as you are comfortable providing. Also, please try to keep your profiles reasonably short, and not ramble on and on as aspies are inclined to do, since it will take up too much space.

Romantically-Interested Singles

Template
[Insert Image Here]
Username: What's your Username? The one listed on the side of all your posts?
Gender: Do you identify yourself as male or female?
Age: How old are you? Again, although technically optional, this one is highly recommended, as a person's age will factor in greatly to their decision of whether or not they want to have a relationship [relationships with large age gaps are usually frowned upon]
Sexuality: This one is required, as people won't be able to know whether they can pursue a relationship with you if they don't know what your sexuality is.
Location: Although optional, this one is highly recommended. It is simply asking where you live, since engaging in a long distance relationship is notoriously hard and usually ends in failure. If a person is willing to move to be with someone, that's they're decision, but if not, its best that they pick someone who lives somewhat close to them.
Religion: What religion do you practice? This is an issue of contention in many relationships where it is different between the two parties, and can often lead to breakups.
Politics: What are your political beliefs? For many, you can just put whatever political party you identify with [liberal/democrat, conservative/republican, independent, libertarian, communist, anarchist, undecided, etc.].
Philosophy: What philosophy do you live your life by? For some you can just name it, but in general most of you will have to give an explanation to explain this one. Just be sure not to make it too long.
Obsessions/Interests: This is completely optional, but naming your obsessions or interests might be a good way for you to connect with someone if they share those things with you.
Desired Partner Characteristics: What are you looking for in a partner? This one is also required, as if you have any requirements for someone you're looking for, and then start to get hooked up with someone who both you and they don't know at first doesn't meet one or some of them, the other person's feelings could be severely hurt if you have to break it off with them later because of them not meeting one of them, which would likely be because of something that the other person is very self-conscious about.
Self-Description: A brief description of yourself and who you are. Try to be as descriptive as possible while at the same time being concise, fitting as much information as you can into as short a description as possible. Remember, you can always tell the person more about you later.

[U][B]Template[/B][/U]
[Insert Image Here]
[B]Username:
Gender:
Age:
Sexuality:
Location:
Religion:
Politics:
Philosophy:
Obsessions/Interests:
Desired Partner Characteristics:
Self-Description:[/B]

Here's mine to provide an example.
[Insert Image Here]
Username: RavenSly
Gender: Male
Age: 20
Sexuality: Heterosexual
Location: Minneapolis, Minnesota, USA
Religion: Currently Undecided [Agnostic for long time, considered but eventually decided against Christianity. Now leaning towards and considering Buddhism]
Politics: Independent [Lean Liberal, but has differing views depending on topic]
Philosophy:
Obsessions/Interests: Writing, Drawing, the Internet, Anime/Manga, Cartoons, Video Games, Learning [pretty much anything, but especially academic subjects like History, Science of any kind, Language, even Math, and anything else I can get my hands on], Philosophy, and Stories in general
Desired Partner Characteristics: Intelligence, Wisdom, Maturity, Compassion, Independence, Loyalty, Honor, Honesty, and although not required, being Pretty wouldn't hurt.
Self-Description: I am a 20-year-old young man from Minneapolis, currently alternating between living with my mother and father. I enjoy art and writing, and want to become a Fiction Author after completing college. I consider myself an honorable and honest person, and can honestly guarantee that I would never lie to a person I was dating. I am also extremely loyal to someone I am emotionally attached to, willing to do pretty much anything for them should the situation call for it [I would literally be willing to die for you if I was dating you]. I have very strong ideals, believing in fairness, honesty, honor, integrity, and common courtesy. I am also quite laid-back, not usually taking things that happen around me seriously, as I've learned that worrying about every little thing that happens simply causes a person unnecessary stress that only wastes energy. I do however have my faults, being far from perfect. I have problems with anger and aggression, although I'm currently working on them [I'm about to begin an Anger Management course]. My manners are poor, as are my hygienic habits. I am known for being crass, rude, and obscene, as I swear relatively frequently in common conversation [not all the time like some people, but I'll drop an F-bomb occasionally and will usually say "****" a few times in a conversation]. I'm also notoriously lazy, having problems with motivation and my work ethic if I don't like whatever it is I'm being expected to do. Still, none of these things are absolutes, and they change frequently, and I'm getting more mature all the time. That's me in a nutshell, so please, if there's anyone out there willing to take a chance on me, I would appreciate it immensely if you'd give me a chance to show you how loving a person I can be.

And there you have it, I basically just described myself in a single paragraph, albeit a pretty long one. Now you give it a try, and soon enough we'll have a good pool of singles to work with, so that everyone can find someone who works for them. So, are you willing to take a chance on love?

Hi I am really interested in finding a nice christian girl to date this thread looks great for me please can I be involved?

My name is Daniel I am 23 and I have a diagnosis of adhd and autism, I am hoping to meet a girl who is also on the spectrum who I can date. I am a christian and I would like to hopefully find a nice christian girl, I live in northampton and am new to this site I am a very able young man and have been told I am full of character I also work 5 days a week which I enjoy and I drive too

Please feel free to comment or post to me or however it works
Thankyou
Daniel X
Thank you

 

[Mary 1]

Hi @acstar
I am NT and my partner is AS. We are dating more then a month and we had the most wonderful time together. He told me on our second date that he has AS. I accepted it. However, recently he had crisis and I didn't know ( I still don't know) how to react as he stopped sending me emails, texts or talking to me on a phone. I found this website so helpful. I am speaking to many people who kindly give me advice, suggestions and critics. And I am learning a lot now why it happens and how to handle myself now. I am preparing to send him email in few days as he needs space now and be alone. I love him more then anything. He is lovely kind intelligent middle age man and he said he loves me too. He said he finally found his perfect woman. I support his special interests, we go to places he or we both like and generally we are very happy when we are together.
I completely agree with you. For AS is better to be with NT as we bring the best in them and we respect their personalities their interests and them as they are. They also learn new things and try new things. Thus is the best thing to do together especially if you are in love. I am currently hoping he will reply to my email as he stopped communication with me two days ago. Maybe he is ashamed of his condition...maybe he just needs space on his own...maybe he was overwhelmed with our love. I backed off and now it' waiting time. I still love him of course and will never stop as he is the most wonderful man I ever met and he said so many times that he love me too.
So, I do believe in NT - AS relationship as I am/was in one which is/was just fantastic.

 

[granty1988]

Username: Granty1988
Gender: Male
Age: 29
Sexuality: Heterosexual
Location: Oxford, United Kingdom
Religion: None
Politics: Undecided
Philosophy: Treat people how you wish to be treated, keep an open mind no matter how much you think you know, and always try to do the right thing.
Obsessions/Interests: Movies, outdoor pursuits, nature, museums,
Desired Partner Characteristics: Would like someone that is true to themselves and confident.
Self-Description: Ive been called, kind, caring and a good listener, i will do everything to help people. Im usually a quiet person, somewhat of a gentle giant. If you would like to know anything else about me please feel free to ask.

 

[loneaspie]

Per a link from another user in a thread where I was looking for dates, here’s all my info:

Username: loneaspie
Gender: Male
Age: 26
Sexuality: Heterosexual
Location: United States
Religion: Christian
Politics: Independent
Philosophy: Be kind to all. Explore everything.
Obsessions/Interests: Computers. (and also space and sci-fi). I like to write and play music as well.
Desired Partner Characteristics: I would prefer a girl with naturally blonde or brunette hair, hopefully in the US or Canada. And I dream of a loving, serious relationship, and kids. Please be younger than 30.
Self-Description: Well, I have the typical ‘Aspie’ traits you’d expect. I am also kind, patient, very faithful, and loving. I love to explore ideas. There’s nothing else to write here, really, except please check my profile or message if interested.

 

[Isadoorian]

Username Isadoorian, but you can call me Tristan
Gender Male
Age 22
Sexuality Heterosexual
Location British Columbia, Canada
Religion Agnostic Atheist (I consider myself to be a Schrodinger's Athiest, there both is and isn't a God)
Politics N/A; hate it, nothing but middle aged people arguing about crap they can't and refuse to comprehend (see the Mark Zuckerberg vs US Senators trial)
Philosophy Follow Wheaton's Law
Obsessions/Interests Computery stuff, Video and Tabletop/Card Games, Cooking, Baking, Reading, listening to music, wanting to get more into exercise, hiking and photography
Desired Partner Characteristics As long as you're Child Free, have similar interests and are a good person, personality and behaviour wise, I don't care what your ethnicity or hair colour is; Transgender people are also welcome! I do not discriminate!
Self Description I'm 5 foot 5, Native American (I know I don't look it), overweight but want to change that, and just want a simple lifestyle in life; As you can tell I'm kinda nerdy as well

If you feel like we might make a good connection or you're just curious to know more, feel free to shoot me a PM!

 

[paloftoon]

Username: "Spitfire"
Gender: Male
Age: late 30s
Sexuality: Homosexual
Location: Philadelphia, PA
Politics: More liberal minded probably, but casual about it. Let me have my own beliefs and just accept me for who I am and I can do the same for you.
Philosophy: Be blunt 1-1 as much as possible.
Obsessions/Interests: competitive chess, competitive Scrabble, anime, tabletops, other
Desired Partner Characteristics: If you're not at least relatively independent, have a supportive family and don't depend on me to support you. Be blunt and honest, but in appropriate contexts. Be open to trying some things with me, teaching me some things, and just letting each other be ourselves too. Prefer you be a non-smoker and into no drugs. I could probably "put up" with 420 and smoking if only done outside of a home. We can start off as platonic friends or even try to end up staying as platonic friends even after a break up. Be reciprocative- think about me sometimes, and I will try to do the same for you. Be open to romantic fun, but not forceful either.
Self-Description:
I don't want to be judged on label. I tend not to get along with many people in the NT world or on the spectrum. Those on the spectrum I can level with more, many of them have quite different interests or unintentionally have disrespected my time and energy too much for me to be with them. I am independent, but struggling to adult and balance constantly with some common and not so common life factors. I know I have a lot to offer, and I hope you do too.

 

[Homebrand]

Username: Homebrand
Gender: Female
Age: 29
Sexuality: Heterosexual
Location: Sydney, Australia
Religion: Quite open and neither believe not disbelieve in majority of possibilities
Politics: Yuck! I mean I follow it here and their but loath most people and parties involved to be quite honest
Philosophy: I see philosophy as a discussion topic not a place for a single paragraph answer
Obsessions/Interests: music, psychology, health, deep and meaningful discussions, travel/adventures, human rights.
Desired Partner Characteristics: Is at least living in Australia and preferably NSW. Is capable of having a good d&m here and there. Is working or studying. Lives independently. Aged between 26 and 36. Kind, compassionate and respectful of others is one thing thats non-negetiable! I am not particularly concerned with looks as brains and personality are far more important to me.
Self-Description: I'm not a cat person, I'm a dog person! Can be a bit of a chatterbox and quite social but also very much need my alone time. I often treat others as they treat me, good or bad but I am a kind and compassionate person and prefer to treat people well. Good sense of humour. I am not particularly affectionate and don't like too much touching. Very honest and upfront.

 

[aspieoutlaw89]

Username:Jared Mills (also my full name)

Gender:Male

Age:26

Sexuality:Straight (Chubby Chaser)

Location:The Bronx,NY,USA

Interests:Casual Gamer,WWE (Raised as a fan),Eating Healthy (Drinking Water),New York Style Food (Hot Dogs,Pizza,Halal Food),balancing Martial Arts With Physical Activity (Jogging,Deep Internal Breathing,Push Ups),watching local news (watching what's going on around the city & in the bronx),Martial Arts & Mixed Martial Arts used by aspies to physically & socially prep themselves for fights for social acceptance & inclusion.

Self-Descriptionmay be a long one) a proud aspie gamer & lifelong wrestling fan who loves anything full-contact (mostly mixed martial arts) with a Deadpool-like sense of humor,born & raised in the greatest city in the world.i hope to be a cage-fighter before i hit my thirties,but not without low-muscle tone.i also want to have clear skin.my favorite TV Shows Are Z Nation (i liked what one of the characters said,something about having some fun) & The Simpsons (lifelong viewer,my father was a viewer.)i also tend to treat people the same way they treat me,good or bad,i also tend to be less talkative to others the same way they can be to me (Gmail,Twitter).when i'm promted or pressured to do things that i don't feel like doing,like every other aspie,i tend to shut down real fast & real quick.my plans after i left school:joining an aspergian or aspergerian brotherhood.

 

[Not Sure]

Template

Username:Not Sure

Gender:Trans Male

Age:34

Sexuality:Homoflexible Bottom Masochist, polyamorous, hypersexual

Location:Atlanta, GA

Religion:Luciferian, ex-baptist

Politics:Socialist

Philosophy:Be decent to each other. Live and let live. Treat everyone as though they were you. They are.

Obsessions/Interests:Talking to animals, learning, listening to Alan Watts and Terence McKenna, playing Skyrim and Fallout 4

Desired Partner Characteristics:Top, dominant, trusting, blunt, headstrong, considerate, freethinking. Age is mostly unimportant to me.

Self-Description:I don’t take part in normal working society. I bake, I clean the house, play with the cat and dog. I like to go for hikes. I love nature, I miss the country. (But not the people) I don’t talk much. I’m not very good at using words to describe what’s in my head but I do my best.

 

[Mr Allen]

Username Mr Allen
Age 42
Location Sheffield, England, UK
Gender Male
Sexuality Straight (contrary to popular belief)
Marital status Single
Obsessions/Interests 60's, 70's and 80's Pop, Xbox, PC and Android gaming, programming (Unity and Python), Martial Arts, snooker and pool, swimming, 10 Pin Bowling, Karaoke.
Looking for in a Partner Well after over 30 years of watching Aussie soaps, I've come to the conclusion that Australia is home to some of the hottest women in the known Universe, even the older ones lol. I also don't mind the age of the girl or woman, as long as she's over 18 of course, or the Nationality, my only real restriction is non smokers only, I don't approve of smoking in general, not even E-Cigarettes.

 

[Lady Lucifer]

I'm not particularly interested in dating anyone on this site. (Personal reasons) However, I will respond to this forum, as I need some dating advice as I am AS and haven't been in that many serious relationships.

Username: Lady Lucifer
Gender: Cis Female
Age: 22
Sexuality: Hetrosexual, nonmonogamous
Obsessions/Interests: True Crime or psychology or medical documentaries, Disney (princesses and villains to be specific), metal music and video editing.
Desired Partner Characteristics: I need someone who understands physical and social boundaries. I'm not interested in hook up culture, as I never had a relationship last longer than a month. (for romantic partners) I need someone to tell me how they are feeling. At the same time, I don't like clingy partners. I need space. I don't like being touched (I have a history of sexual abuse) and for a romantic partner, I need to work my way with physical contact.

 

[Sheldon]

Name. Stacey

Gender. Female

Age. 28

Just looking for new friend, and thought I would say hello!

 

[DiverseWonderland]

oh this will be good XD

Username: DiverseWonderland
Gender: Male
Age: 17
Sexuality: *Classified*
Location: Wonderland
Religion: LDS
Politics: *Classified*
Philosophy: Choose the right
Obsessions/Interests: Superheroes and Anime and Horror and Video games and Music
Desired Partner Characteristics: Kind and pretty and funny and caring and good morals and serious but not too serious and similar interests and *Classified*
Self-Description: Black hair and brown eyes and *Classified*

and that's all ya getting

 

[Gritches]

Username: Gritches
Gender: Male
Age: 28
Sexuality: Heterosexual
Location: West-Central Minnesota, USA
Religion: Christian, though unaffiliated with organized religion
Politics: Liberal, but thoroughly uninterested in politics
Philosophy: One of my own creation based loosely on Utilitarianism and Zen Buddhism
Obsessions/Interests: Psychology, self-improvement, philosophy, psychopharmacology, and video games.
Desired Partner Characteristics: I find intelligence to be attractive and find materialism/shallowness tedious. Otherwise, I really don't have preconceived notions of what a person "ought" to be.
Self-Description: I am a profoundly happy and peaceful person with lots of love to give. I am principled, self-disciplined, and mature. I'm told that I'm funny, fun to be around, and charismatic. I'm loyal to a fault and follow a general desire to treat others how I want to be treated.

If you want a pic, talk to me first. I tend to get stalkers when I give out my pic too freely.

 

[granty1988]

Username: Granty1988
Gender: Male
Age: 29
Sexuality: Heterosexual
Location: Oxford, United Kingdom
Religion: None
Politics: Undecided
Philosophy: Treat people how you wish to be treated, keep an open mind no matter how much you think you know, and always try to do the right thing.
Obsessions/Interests: Movies, outdoor pursuits, nature, museums,
Desired Partner Characteristics: Would like someone that is true to themselves and confident.
Self-Description: Ive been called, kind, caring and a good listener, i will do everything to help people. Im usually a quiet person, somewhat of a gentle giant. If you would like to know anything else about me please feel free to ask.