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Dating Corner


Well-Known Member
For those with the Asperger's Syndrome condition, love can be extremely hard to do properly, as finding the right person, and under the right circumstances, is nearly impossible. Something always seems to get in the way, whether it be some critical difference that makes a potential mate incompatible [religion, philosophy, your level of contact with them], them already being in a relationship [people often forget that the people who are considered "prime choices" are often already in a relationship, as you will rarely have been the one to have gotten there first], or more often than not, that at some point during the courtship, we mess it up due to the Aspie condition and they become turned off by us.

Therefore, I believe that a place should exist here, where everyone else understands the condition we have and its effects, because everyone either has it themselves, or at least is close to someone who does. While none of us came here specifically to pursue a relationship, having the option to if no other viable options are open to us, or if one simply prefers it over those that are, is a convenient and viable option for finding someone who you can form a successful relationship with, as opposed to the relatively-low chances that one would have in real life, due to most people one would meet not understanding the condition, simply attributing our actions to rudeness, poor manners, and so on and so forth [you all know the story].

Here is what I propose. I will make here a list of people seeking a relationship, as well as a template that people can fill out for themselves as a sort of mini profile that will have some basic information. If people see someone they like who is compatible with them by their sexuality and gender, then they can talk with that person a bit here, and then start a PM conversation with them to pursue a deeper relationship. This thread is still a work in progress, and so, I will take suggestions on ways I can improve it and make it more efficient [this, I know to of course be one of those words we aspies love to use].

Note: When filling out the template, if you don't feel comfortable giving a piece of information, then don't give it. Only give as much information as you are comfortable providing. Also, please try to keep your profiles reasonably short, and not ramble on and on as aspies are inclined to do, since it will take up too much space.

Romantically-Interested Singles

[Insert Image Here]
Username: What's your Username? The one listed on the side of all your posts?
Gender: Do you identify yourself as male or female?
Age: How old are you? Again, although technically optional, this one is highly recommended, as a person's age will factor in greatly to their decision of whether or not they want to have a relationship [relationships with large age gaps are usually frowned upon]
Sexuality: This one is required, as people won't be able to know whether they can pursue a relationship with you if they don't know what your sexuality is.
Location: Although optional, this one is highly recommended. It is simply asking where you live, since engaging in a long distance relationship is notoriously hard and usually ends in failure. If a person is willing to move to be with someone, that's they're decision, but if not, its best that they pick someone who lives somewhat close to them.
Religion: What religion do you practice? This is an issue of contention in many relationships where it is different between the two parties, and can often lead to breakups.
Politics: What are your political beliefs? For many, you can just put whatever political party you identify with [liberal/democrat, conservative/republican, independent, libertarian, communist, anarchist, undecided, etc.].
Philosophy: What philosophy do you live your life by? For some you can just name it, but in general most of you will have to give an explanation to explain this one. Just be sure not to make it too long.
Obsessions/Interests: This is completely optional, but naming your obsessions or interests might be a good way for you to connect with someone if they share those things with you.
Desired Partner Characteristics: What are you looking for in a partner? This one is also required, as if you have any requirements for someone you're looking for, and then start to get hooked up with someone who both you and they don't know at first doesn't meet one or some of them, the other person's feelings could be severely hurt if you have to break it off with them later because of them not meeting one of them, which would likely be because of something that the other person is very self-conscious about.
Self-Description: A brief description of yourself and who you are. Try to be as descriptive as possible while at the same time being concise, fitting as much information as you can into as short a description as possible. Remember, you can always tell the person more about you later.

[Insert Image Here]
[B]Desired Partner Characteristics:[/B]

Here's mine to provide an example.
[Insert Image Here]
Username: RavenSly
Gender: Male
Age: 20
Sexuality: Heterosexual
Location: Minneapolis, Minnesota, USA
Religion: Currently Undecided [Agnostic for long time, considered but eventually decided against Christianity. Now leaning towards and considering Buddhism]
Politics: Independent [Lean Liberal, but has differing views depending on topic]
Obsessions/Interests: Writing, Drawing, the Internet, Anime/Manga, Cartoons, Video Games, Learning [pretty much anything, but especially academic subjects like History, Science of any kind, Language, even Math, and anything else I can get my hands on], Philosophy, and Stories in general
Desired Partner Characteristics: Intelligence, Wisdom, Maturity, Compassion, Independence, Loyalty, Honor, Honesty, and although not required, being Pretty wouldn't hurt.
Self-Description: I am a 20-year-old young man from Minneapolis, currently alternating between living with my mother and father. I enjoy art and writing, and want to become a Fiction Author after completing college. I consider myself an honorable and honest person, and can honestly guarantee that I would never lie to a person I was dating. I am also extremely loyal to someone I am emotionally attached to, willing to do pretty much anything for them should the situation call for it [I would literally be willing to die for you if I was dating you]. I have very strong ideals, believing in fairness, honesty, honor, integrity, and common courtesy. I am also quite laid-back, not usually taking things that happen around me seriously, as I've learned that worrying about every little thing that happens simply causes a person unnecessary stress that only wastes energy. I do however have my faults, being far from perfect. I have problems with anger and aggression, although I'm currently working on them [I'm about to begin an Anger Management course]. My manners are poor, as are my hygienic habits. I am known for being crass, rude, and obscene, as I swear relatively frequently in common conversation [not all the time like some people, but I'll drop an F-bomb occasionally and will usually say "****" a few times in a conversation]. I'm also notoriously lazy, having problems with motivation and my work ethic if I don't like whatever it is I'm being expected to do. Still, none of these things are absolutes, and they change frequently, and I'm getting more mature all the time. That's me in a nutshell, so please, if there's anyone out there willing to take a chance on me, I would appreciate it immensely if you'd give me a chance to show you how loving a person I can be.

And there you have it, I basically just described myself in a single paragraph, albeit a pretty long one. Now you give it a try, and soon enough we'll have a good pool of singles to work with, so that everyone can find someone who works for them. So, are you willing to take a chance on love?
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Sounds like fun ;).

Username: Mr. Jones
Gender: Male
Age: 20 (will be 21 years old in a month)
Sexuality: Heterosexual
Location: Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada
Religion: Atheist
Politics: Marxism-Leninism and soon-to-be member of the Communist Party of Canada.
Philosophy: I have my own but Plato, Karl Marx, Vladimir Lenin, H. K. Mencken, and Friedrich Neitzche all interest me.
Obsessions/Interests: Middle Eastern Studies and Area Studies (especially Pakistan, Afghanistan, the Sahel, and the Central Asian Republics); Earth Sciences (especially with ergs and sand dunes but also plate tectonics, the rock cycle, caves, deserts, earthquakes, volcanos, etc.); Atmospheric Sciences; Peace and Conflict Studies; International Relations; Political Science; Buses; Economics; History; Maps; Chess; Photography; Insects and Spiders (I raise and collect them); Book Collecting
Desired Partner Characteristics: Intelligent, empathetic, a good listener, having a descent sense of morality and ethics, patient, and understanding.
Self-Description: I am turning 21 years old in February, live outside of Winnipeg and living with my mother full-time. I enjoy learning about countries and regions of the world and I know all the world’s capital cities by memory. The Middle East, the Central Asian Republics, the Sahel, North Africa, the Horn of Africa, the Arabian Peninsula, and de facto states are what I specialize in, or, in simpler terms, mostly Pakistan, Afghanistan, Niger, Chad, Mali, Mauritania, Burkina Faso, Sudan, Uzbekistan, Saudi Arabia, Ethiopia, Eritrea, Djibouti, Oman, Qatar, Israel, Kazakhstan, Armenia, Azerbaijan, Abkhazia, South Ossetia, Nagorno-Karabakh, and other such places. My office contains the flags of Burkina Faso, Somalia, People’s Republic of China, Iceland, Saudi Arabia, United Arab Emirates, Norway, Bangladesh, Libya, Turkey, Vietnam, Brazil, Egypt, Sudan, Ethiopia, Chad, India, Nigeria, Iran, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Finland, Thailand, Mexico, Sri Lanka, Kenya, Venezuela, Indonesia, and many more. Peace and Conflict studies is the discipline within area studies that I am most fascinated by; the Soviet Occupation of Afghanistan and the ‘War on Terror’ I read heavily on. I like reading about earth and atmospheric sciences to understand how the earth works. Was learning about these in university before I dropped out and won numerous awards for my grades in them previously. Ergs and sand dunes are my favourite but I also like geology, plate tectonics, and other earth related subjects. I raise tarantulas, true spiders, centipedes, and scorpions in my bug shed and collect framed insects for taxonomic purposes. These are important to me and you’ll have to accept that I have them, something surprisingly few women will do. I have over 20 feet of world maps on my walls, collect encyclopedias, love photographing things, and other weird hobbies. Recently I applied to become a member of the Communist Party of Canada to express my political beliefs more and I used to play competitive chess when I was younger. One of my weirdest passions are buses and I can’t really explain this. In a few years I hope to attend a driving school to learn to drive highway motor coaches for companies like Greyhound and Coach Canada. (A Marathon Coach Prevost H3-45 is my current avatar.) My best friend (who is female) describes me as “honest, loyal, kind, loving, understanding, accepting, trustworthy, and incredibly thoughtful.” She can describe me better in that regard than I can. Never lied to a girlfriend ever - I am very straightforward and will say whatever it is that is on my mind. Few others have told me that I am rude - mannerism is something I can do. In fact I do it so well that it bothers others, being too polite and formal, but usually I am quiet and say nothing due to speaking incoherently. I don’t consume alcohol, do drugs, gamble, or approve of pornography. Cursing is something I try not to ever do around women because it is inappropriate in my opinion and bad behavior. Issues I have are with obsessive perfectionism, self-harming, and a long history of child abuse trauma, all of which a counselor is helping me with. My worst fear is of sex and intimacy. (I know how that sounds.) Overall, though, I think I could make a good friend/relationship partner if I am given a chance.

This is my attempt ;).
Username: ST.TIMMY aka Tim Goodwin

Gender: Male

Age: 22

Sexuality: Bisexual

Location: Perth, Western Australia

Religion: Chrisitianity. I went to a Catholic school for four years.

Politics: What are your political beliefs? Politics are like nappies/diapers. They need to be changed regularly; for the same reason!

Philosophy: That no man lives forever, that dead men rise up never, that even the weariest river winds somewhere safe to sea...- Algernon Charles Swinburne


Art- I love to draw, especially when I'm frustrated. Which is most of the time. My favourite illustrators are Gerald Scarfe, John Kricfalusi, Quentin Blake and Brett Helquist, as well as Tim Burton: the man who directed Edward Scissorhands and Sweeney Todd.

Music- Mainly hard rock, rap and heavy metal, some classical. My favourite bands are The Beatles, Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd and Queen. I also like musicals; they're always fun. I play in two pseudo-bands and my biggest musical influences are Tenacious D, Eminem and Billy Joel.

Movies- My top five movies are as follows: The Spy Who Loved Me, The Empire Strikes Back, The Phantom Of The Opera, This Is Spinal Tap and Chasing Amy.

Reading- It takes me a while to FINISH anything though. Unless it's a Paul Jennings book. That man is the best thing that happened to our country since Aussie Rules. Speaking of which...

Sport- (AFL/ Aussie Rules Football) I support our local talent- The West Coast Eagles- but I hate the Dockers like poison. I could have been a legend on the field but chose to pursue a career in music instead. I am obsessed with statistics and the history of our game; for example, I know who won the first Brownlow Medal (E.Carji Greeves in 1924) and I know who played the most games (Michael Tuck from Hawthorn).

Desired Partner Characteristics: Someone with experience; someone who will understand me, someone who won't make me feel uncomfortable in social situations. Also... big girls do it better! Only a dog wants a bone ;)

Self-Description: I'm an eccentric character; a self-conscious office worker with a taste for the theatrical. Music plays a very big role in my life; it has always been there for me when other people weren't. I wish I had a better start to the dating game but until now it's been hard for me. I grew up in a dysfunctional family, I was misunderstood as a teenager and after enrolling in a correspondence course, I came down with epilepsy in 2008. I graduated high school in the same year and dropped out of Murdoch the following year. I've never had a relationship that lasted longer than three months... for a multitude of reasons. But I think the biggest problem of all was assuming. When you assume... you make an ass out of you and me and that's exactly what I did. But, in the words of Nick Littlemore, you need to keep your show on the road. And, like Meat Loaf told me when he came down here, the woman is always right. I will make an effort to listen and not to assume in the future.
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I still really do think this was a good idea, especially with how hard it seems for us to find dates on dating sites. Looking at the rest of this section, I see that a lot of the other members here are essentially asking for something like this thread, so I just hope that giving it another chance might allow people to find what they were looking for that they can't get at a dating site.

Just to get people in the mood a bit, here's another of my favorite love songs, again one who's subject matter I think applies especially well to us:
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Age:21 and a bit (24 :))
Sexuality:sexual athiest ( i believe i'll never get any) hetero
Location:croydon, england
Politics:take a rubber mallet to everyone being idiots
Philosophy:cute women should be complimented, walk softly and carry a big gun, do what you can because life can ALWAYS get worse
Obsessions/Interests:chainmail, books, medival weaponry and armor, films, video games
Desired Partner Characteristics:female, living, can put up with me as i am but happy if i improve. loves displays of affection
Self-Description:i'm crazy, lazy, self depricating often have my mind in the gutter. oh and i am bluntly honest about things, i will do my best at a relationship but i'm not the easiest person to love.

sorry if i necro'd the thread
asperger syndrome/autism, or just being socially-awkward, socially-inept, hurts guys way more than girls since almost all girls are old-fashioned and expect guys to chase them, ask them out, approach them
Username: Geordie

Gender: Male

Age: 22

Sexuality: Straight Heterosexual

Location: Singapore

Religion: Christian-Protestant - with Taoist and Buddhist parents.

Politics: People's Action Party in Singapore politics. Globally, the Green Party

Philosophy: An examined life is worth living. (A twisted form of Socrates' quote, 'The Unexamined Life Is Not Worth Living')

Obsessions/Interests: Geography (esp. Cities and Population Studies), Sociology/Society, Politics, Philosophy, Economics, Business

Desired Partner Characteristics: She has to provide for my family, accommodate to my parents' religious beliefs and other customs non-Asians may not 'get'), and have the sort of emotional resilience to put up with my moody days when I am feeling stressed at work.

Self-Description: Extroverted person with seemingly little social know-how.

Also, my info for the stuff on my profile has changed a lot since I posted this, so I guess I should probably re-do it:
Photo on 2012-10-23 at 15.16 #2.jpg
Username: RavenSly
Gender: Male
Age: 21
Sexuality: Heterosexual
Location: Minneapolis, Minnesota, USA
Religion: Buddhism
Politics: Democratic Socialist
Philosophy: "Good is to pursue perfection, Evil is to expect it." –Personal Motto
Obsessions/Interests: Writing, RP Forums, Anime/Manga, Cartoons, Video Games, Academia and Leaning, Philosophy, and Stories in General to name just a few [I have many, many interests]
Desired Partner Characteristics: Intelligence, Wisdom, Maturity, Independence, Compassion, Loyalty, Honesty, Honor, and still, although not required, I'd like her to be somewhat pretty.
Self-Description: I am now 21, and have grown a lot in terms of maturity and wisdom since I made my last profile, hence my redoing it. I have largely conquered many of my problems with anger and laziness now, as I've finally figured out the root cause of them, which was the lack of trust between me and my parents in our relationships with one another [this applies both ways]. I feel that after realizing this that it has finally allowed me control over my problems, and so I feel rejuvenated, as a new person. I am now in the process of applying to college for the Spring Semester, am looking for a job, and am taking care of my problems more independently than I was before.

What I truly want however is still just someone I can be truly intimate with, who will be able to look into me, see who it is I truly am, and then after doing so, to accept me anyway. I happen to believe that that is what a lot of the people here who are looking for a date partner want. So, if someone will just give me a chance by sending me a PM and trying to get to know me better, I promise that I will do that for you as well. I will also state that I am a truly, absolutely honest person, whose word is therefore completely trustworthy. You don't have to put up armor around me because you're worried I might be lying to you, because I never do. I am also the most loyal, loving, and compassionate boyfriend you could ever have, and all I really want is to be loved. Give me that and I'll do anything for you [as long as it doesn't go against my ideals and ethical rules for myself].
Orcutt, CA, USA
My interests are writing, reading books/manga, watching movies/anime/t.v., play video games/board games, work on jigsaw puzzles, and learn about history.
What I look for in a woman is some one who is caring, faithful, intelligent, honest, and loyal. I would love to find some one who is Japanese or Asian but it's not a big requirement since I also love blue-eyed brunettes and redheads. As for body type it doesn't matter because I'm more interested in the connection our hearts make.
I would say that I'm shy at first but once I get to know you I'll open up more. I love to talk about certain subjects like movies and video games for example.
Username: AspieDroid
Gender: Female
Age: 22 (Desired age for a mate: 22-27)
Sexuality: Bisexual, leaning towards straight
Location: Fairfax, Virginia
Religion: Universalist
Politics: Undecided
Philosophy: "Be good to other people"
Obsessions/Interests: NBC's Community, SNL, Ricardo Rodriguez from WWE, Chakras, Drawing, Reading, Game of Thrones, Portal, Age of Empires II, TF2, Deadpool, Captain America, Cosplay, Wigs, Video Games, Stand Up Comedy, Beauty Tutorials on Youtube, Cuddling, Cats, Anime, Hugs, The Nostalgia Critic, Bento Boxes, Lychee-Flavored things.
Desired Partner Characteristics: Well, I'd like a guy who's near me, is loyal and won't cheat on me (my only boyfriend did that) and is nice. I want a guy who likes hugs and cuddling, who I can try out my Bento-Making skills for! I want a guy with similar interests who can do activites (such as cosplaying/going to cons) with me. I love curtain cuts on guys!!! ♥.♥ The best example of this is Ricardo Rodriguez's early days in WWE, I'm not going to lie, if there's a guy on this forum who looks like him, I definitely want him!! ♥.♥ o.o >w<
Self-Description: I'm a tomboyish geek gal who loves wigs and cosplaying. I'm soft and cuddly, too!
[Insert Image Here]
I don't want to post my picture on this site, but I will send it to someone who asks if there is mutual interest.
Location:California near S.F.
Desired Partner Characteristics:
good critical thinking skills, open-minded, physically affectionate, ethical vegan, environmentally-aware, concerned about the oppressed and downtrodden of the world, drug-free, non-religious, HIGH self-esteem, non-gender-conforming, and not hung up on race
Self-Description:See my profile on this site. Details available on request.
eventhough i'm straight, i have told myself for a long-ass time now, that I bet if I was born a girl, i would have had my first boyfriend, lost my virginity a long time ago

No offense (but already offending), but this is plain and simple nonsense. It's irrational to think other people have an easier life, just because they've born different from you. Being men, women, straight or not, or anything in between have it's own advantages and disadvanges. From what've seen in my life, most of people, regardless of what they are, struggle with loneliness, rejection and dating at one point in their lives.

You cannot choose your gender or sexual orientation. Instead, you can choose to do your best from what you have, from who you are. You can choose to improve yourself, have patience, trying to get more wiser, more skilled at social interactions, and enjoy your limited time on this earth.

I'm sorry if I seem harsh. But this is what I believe now. I might change opinion. But this is what I at least try to do every day. It's not always sunshine, lollypops and rainbows, but it's certainly not always darkness.

Best of luck.
Name. Stacey

Gender. Female

Age. 28

Sexual orientation. ???

Location. Uk

Politics. Don't vote.

Religion. I believe in God.

A little about me...

I'm a human being living in a world full of other human beings, so I figure that someone is bound to 'click' with me eventually. :)

(This ad is a prime example of why I've been single, the majority of my adult life. Lol)
Will trade pics in private.

Username: Licorice

Gender: Female

Age: 24

Sexuality: Bisexual

Location: Twin Cities area, Minnesota

Religion: None

Politics: Liberal/Democratic party

I spend a lot of time writing (or at least planning) and I'm aiming to self-publish a novella this fall. My favorite author is Stephen King, and I also read philosophy.

I enjoy movies ranging from sci-fi to horror to animation. I don't watch much TV, but do follow Game of Thrones, Doctor Who, and The Walking Dead when there's a new season.

I cook and like to talk about easy recipes to make at home. There was a time when I wanted to pursue it for a career, but decided against it after a few classes.

Desired Partner Characteristics:
I like people who are creative, tough-minded with a healthy dose of character, not too serious, and at least somewhat assertive. I'm not afraid to approach someone I like if I think we have a chance, but it's not fair for one person to do the lion's share in a relationship.

I've always been somewhat solitary, but am comfortable around people in adulthood. I still prefer privacy and working on my own personal projects, though. I want to contribute meaningful writing to the world, discover new things, and lead a peaceful life in the city.

Now that depression and anxiety is no longer a struggle in my life, I'm redoubling my efforts to find long-term work and finish my education.
Username: Imahigo
Gender: Female
Age: 20
Sexuality: Demisexual
Location: Middle Tennessee Area, United States.
Religion: I consider myself an agnostic. I respect other religions, though. I really dislike it when people force me to believe in something that I don't want to believe in.
Politics: I consider myself a liberal. But I'm not your stereotypical liberal. Yes, I'm for gay marriage, but I'm also for the NRA. But really, I find the real issue with our government is the overcrowding prison population and some criminals get away with their crime, and some people are wrongly accused and/or serve a longer sentence than they should. I.E. A man murders his wife and serves only 5 years in prison. Someone is caught doing crack cocaine, they are in prison for at least 15 years.
Philosophy: I'm a firm believer in everything happens for a reason. I refuse to believe in coincidences. However, I do believe that our future isn't set in motion.
Obsessions/Interests: I love cars and I'm a gamer-nerd.
Desired Partner Characteristics: Someone who is kind, caring, and compassionate. I'd like someone willing to feed me soup when I get sick, or go buy me a lot of chocolate when I'm on my period. Also like someone I could talk to who would listen to everything I have to say. That's really all I need.
I'm a tall African-American woman standing at 5'9". I'm a little overweight. I'm somewhat calm and very loquacious. I'm shy at first but once you get to know me I'm a totally different person. I'm a kind person with a sense of humor. I really don't like crowded places. I refer to lie out in the country rather than in the city because there are too many people. I also don't really have much fun at huge parties and gatherings. As there are too many people and I start getting anxiety attacks.

I'm also currently a student at Tennessee Tech University studying computer science. I've had some minor set backs due to some emotional issues. I'm also afflicted with depression and sometimes it hits me hard, I feel like laying down in bed, doing nothing but sleep and wish the entire day would end. But other than that, my friends say I'm a wonderful person.
Username: Shiznown
Gender: Male
Age: 26
Sexuality: Straight
Location: Baltimore, Maryland
Religion: More spiritual than religious.
Politics: I identify most with libertarian
Philosophy: Do whatever you want, as long as it doesn't harm anyone but yourself.
Obsessions/Interests: Doctor Who, Comics, Video Games, Wrestling, Bodybuilding, Heavy Metal, Action movies, Scifi, some anime
Desired Partner Characteristics: Someone who would be considered on the nerdy side. Someone I can watch Doctor Who, play video games and read comics with. Someone who is nice and supports me with my life goals.
Self-Description: I want to become a personal trainer. I want to help people get strong and get in shape. I am really into fitness and being strong. I love reading comics and I love learning things. I have spent time reteaching myself things like grammar, mathematics and history. I was not taught these things properly in school, so I have chosen to teach myself. It is not important that my potential partner shares my love for fitness, as long as she can be supportive. As far as physical appearance, I am about 182cm, which is just under 6 foot. I am around 212 pounds. Here are two photos of me.
Username: Andrew206
Gender: Male
Age: 31
Location: Seattle, WA
Religion: Christian
Politics: Liberal
Obsessions: karaoke, WWE, oatmeal, fried chicken, computer programming

Self-description: I'm a prep cook during the day in a corporate cafeteria. When I'm not working I'm usually doing karaoke, watching a Mariners or Seahawks game, or practicing my coding skills on codecademy.com.
I am married, but I wanted to post and say that I think this is a good idea. If you are single, and if you have trouble finding an NT who is willing to understand and accept you, then maybe someone else on this site will be more understanding/accepting. Best of luck.

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