For those with the Asperger's Syndrome condition, love can be extremely hard to do properly, as finding the right person, and under the right circumstances, is nearly impossible. Something always seems to get in the way, whether it be some critical difference that makes a potential mate incompatible [religion, philosophy, your level of contact with them], them already being in a relationship [people often forget that the people who are considered "prime choices" are often already in a relationship, as you will rarely have been the one to have gotten there first], or more often than not, that at some point during the courtship, we mess it up due to the Aspie condition and they become turned off by us.
Therefore, I believe that a place should exist here, where everyone else understands the condition we have and its effects, because everyone either has it themselves, or at least is close to someone who does. While none of us came here specifically to pursue a relationship, having the option to if no other viable options are open to us, or if one simply prefers it over those that are, is a convenient and viable option for finding someone who you can form a successful relationship with, as opposed to the relatively-low chances that one would have in real life, due to most people one would meet not understanding the condition, simply attributing our actions to rudeness, poor manners, and so on and so forth [you all know the story].
Here is what I propose. I will make here a list of people seeking a relationship, as well as a template that people can fill out for themselves as a sort of mini profile that will have some basic information. If people see someone they like who is compatible with them by their sexuality and gender, then they can talk with that person a bit here, and then start a PM conversation with them to pursue a deeper relationship. This thread is still a work in progress, and so, I will take suggestions on ways I can improve it and make it more efficient [this, I know to of course be one of those words we aspies love to use].
Note: When filling out the template, if you don't feel comfortable giving a piece of information, then don't give it. Only give as much information as you are comfortable providing. Also, please try to keep your profiles reasonably short, and not ramble on and on as aspies are inclined to do, since it will take up too much space.
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Username: What's your Username? The one listed on the side of all your posts?
Gender: Do you identify yourself as male or female?
Age: How old are you? Again, although technically optional, this one is highly recommended, as a person's age will factor in greatly to their decision of whether or not they want to have a relationship [relationships with large age gaps are usually frowned upon]
Sexuality: This one is required, as people won't be able to know whether they can pursue a relationship with you if they don't know what your sexuality is.
Location: Although optional, this one is highly recommended. It is simply asking where you live, since engaging in a long distance relationship is notoriously hard and usually ends in failure. If a person is willing to move to be with someone, that's they're decision, but if not, its best that they pick someone who lives somewhat close to them.
Religion: What religion do you practice? This is an issue of contention in many relationships where it is different between the two parties, and can often lead to breakups.
Politics: What are your political beliefs? For many, you can just put whatever political party you identify with [liberal/democrat, conservative/republican, independent, libertarian, communist, anarchist, undecided, etc.].
Philosophy: What philosophy do you live your life by? For some you can just name it, but in general most of you will have to give an explanation to explain this one. Just be sure not to make it too long.
Obsessions/Interests: This is completely optional, but naming your obsessions or interests might be a good way for you to connect with someone if they share those things with you.
Desired Partner Characteristics: What are you looking for in a partner? This one is also required, as if you have any requirements for someone you're looking for, and then start to get hooked up with someone who both you and they don't know at first doesn't meet one or some of them, the other person's feelings could be severely hurt if you have to break it off with them later because of them not meeting one of them, which would likely be because of something that the other person is very self-conscious about.
Self-Description: A brief description of yourself and who you are. Try to be as descriptive as possible while at the same time being concise, fitting as much information as you can into as short a description as possible. Remember, you can always tell the person more about you later.
[U][B]Template[/B][/U] [Insert Image Here] [B]Username:[/B] [B]Gender:[/B] [B]Age:[/B] [B]Sexuality:[/B] [B]Location:[/B] [B]Religion:[/B] [B]Politics:[/B] [B]Philosophy:[/B] [B]Obsessions/Interests:[/B] [B]Desired Partner Characteristics:[/B] [B]Self-Description:[/B]
Here's mine to provide an example.
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Location: Minneapolis, Minnesota, USA
Religion: Currently Undecided [Agnostic for long time, considered but eventually decided against Christianity. Now leaning towards and considering Buddhism]
Politics: Independent [Lean Liberal, but has differing views depending on topic]
Obsessions/Interests: Writing, Drawing, the Internet, Anime/Manga, Cartoons, Video Games, Learning [pretty much anything, but especially academic subjects like History, Science of any kind, Language, even Math, and anything else I can get my hands on], Philosophy, and Stories in general
Desired Partner Characteristics: Intelligence, Wisdom, Maturity, Compassion, Independence, Loyalty, Honor, Honesty, and although not required, being Pretty wouldn't hurt.
Self-Description: I am a 20-year-old young man from Minneapolis, currently alternating between living with my mother and father. I enjoy art and writing, and want to become a Fiction Author after completing college. I consider myself an honorable and honest person, and can honestly guarantee that I would never lie to a person I was dating. I am also extremely loyal to someone I am emotionally attached to, willing to do pretty much anything for them should the situation call for it [I would literally be willing to die for you if I was dating you]. I have very strong ideals, believing in fairness, honesty, honor, integrity, and common courtesy. I am also quite laid-back, not usually taking things that happen around me seriously, as I've learned that worrying about every little thing that happens simply causes a person unnecessary stress that only wastes energy. I do however have my faults, being far from perfect. I have problems with anger and aggression, although I'm currently working on them [I'm about to begin an Anger Management course]. My manners are poor, as are my hygienic habits. I am known for being crass, rude, and obscene, as I swear relatively frequently in common conversation [not all the time like some people, but I'll drop an F-bomb occasionally and will usually say "****" a few times in a conversation]. I'm also notoriously lazy, having problems with motivation and my work ethic if I don't like whatever it is I'm being expected to do. Still, none of these things are absolutes, and they change frequently, and I'm getting more mature all the time. That's me in a nutshell, so please, if there's anyone out there willing to take a chance on me, I would appreciate it immensely if you'd give me a chance to show you how loving a person I can be.
And there you have it, I basically just described myself in a single paragraph, albeit a pretty long one. Now you give it a try, and soon enough we'll have a good pool of singles to work with, so that everyone can find someone who works for them. So, are you willing to take a chance on love?
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