Could it be autism? Diagnosed with CPTSD and feeling very confused.

[SorcererOfSolitude]

Hi, everyone. I'm new to the forum and hoping to get some insight regarding CPTSD and autism.

I have been officially diagnosed with CPTSD for quite a while. However, my partner (professionally diagnosed with autism) has pointed out many behaviors that could be traits of autism. We compiled a list together, I'll copy and paste it here:

- Hyperfixation on certain topics.

- Social difficulties, struggles to maintain contact, feeling left out, drained after social interaction.

- Difficulty expressing emotions, especially sadness and feelings that might make me appear vulnerable, extreme emotional reactions.

- Forcing myself to make eye contact even though I'd rather not and it makes me uncomfortable.

- Mirroring facial expressions and social behaviors to try and blend in.

- Extreme difficulty with change.

- Stimming and feeling the need to suppress stims.

- Vocal stims such as repeating words or lines from entertainment I find amusing.

- Sensory issues (difficulty with clothes especially as a kid)

- Preparing jokes or phrases ahead of time.

- Resistance to touch.

- Prefering to be and work alone.

- Routine and rituals, fall back onto same games and shows.

- Light and sound sensitivity.

- Very schedule based, put down minute to minute outlines for vacation with gf. Don't like lateness or schedules going awry.

- Never had a best friend, always wanted one.

- Eccentric fashion.

- Some difficulty reading between the lines.

- Each item I own has a special place and I don't like when people move things around.

- Idiosyncratic use of language, specifically quoting TV shows and movies out of the blue.

- Difficulty sleeping, sometimes due to sensory issues like room temperature, sheets being too wrinkled, piece of dirt in the bed etc.


Of course, I'm not asking anyone on here to diagnose me. That said, I've been having a very difficult time de-tangling whether or not these symptoms could be the result of my CPTSD or might be indicative of undiagnosed autism. I've read through just about every article online that I could find, and I still haven't been able to get any satisfying answers. I now turn to all of you, hoping that those with autism could provide some insight into whether or not the suspicion that I could be autistic is warranted or not.

I feel like I'm going crazy, I'm so confused going back and forth on whether or not I could be autistic. Unfortunately, professional diagnosis is financially out of reach so I have no solid way to truly answer my burning question. I've been very reluctant to adopt the label of 'autistic', simply because I don't want to take up space in a community that I am not a part of. I feel like an imposter, it doesn't seem like I fit in anywhere.

 

[Slime_Punk]

I'm not a professional (obviously), but you seem to exhibit a lot of the signs. I had quite a lot of the same ones before I took the RAADs test and eventually got diagnosed as an adult. I'm sure plenty of others will be able to offer more insight than I can, but even self-diagnosed people tend to adopt the label who eventually go on to be diagnosed -- I know I did, and there's nothing wrong with that!

Also, it's pretty common to have a PTSD diagnosis prior to figuring out whether you have ASD or not -- that was probably one of the first things I got diagnosed with as well, but it only told a fraction of the story.

Last but not least, since genetic testing isn't exactly a thing yet, any professional who theoretically diagnoses you in the future is going to have your own accounts and symptoms to go off of, which sort of increases your odds of being diagnosed, so recognizing those symptoms can still be an important step when figuring out who you are.

 

[Rodafina]

Hello and welcome to the forum @SorcererOfSolitude.

There’s actually quite a bit of overlap between a trauma response and autistic traits. I think the most important thing is to address the trauma because without addressing that first, it is pretty difficult to move on and think about other things. A realization that you may be autistic could help inform you as to how to go about addressing your trauma and what sort of things may or may not work for you.

I hope you stick around and share your experiences with us and hear about some of ours, because I think there will be many people who can relate to you.

Let us know if you need any help finding your way around the forum.

 

[Gerontius]

Just briefly, autistic people frequently end up traumatized by experience that neurotypicals might find less affecting in the long term.

One can have both. I believe I have.

 

[Outdated]

I think there might be a bit of autism in there too, it's worth you thinking about it.

One huge difference between autism and PTSD - we are born with autism, PTSD doesn't happen until after trauma. If the trauma is from when you were a small child though it's hard to tell the difference for sure. And most autistic people end up traumatised as children.

I agree with @Rodafina that you should stick around a bit and read a few other people's stories, see how much you can relate to. That could help narrow down wether or not you're autistic.

 

[Misty Avich]

It seems that a lot of people with C-PTSD get diagnosed with autism, like there are a lot of similarities between the two conditions.
I have a distant relative who was born with diabetes and has been partially blind all her life. Added to that, her father has abused her, as in bullying her and saying really hurtful things to her. When she was about 12 or 13 she started getting into rages and smashing her room up, to the point where she had to be sent to one of those places for disturbed children.
Then her mother started saying she might be on the spectrum and all that, but I don't think she is. Being bullied and abused by an adult can seriously affect a child and make them frustrated, angry, withdrawn and even confused. Plus being partially blind on top of it must also be unpleasant, along with having to deal with diabetes (which she was bullied at school for because she was the only child in her class diagnosed with diabetes).
I don't have advice for you I'm afraid, but I'm just sharing an experience of someone I know similar to your situation.

 

[Tom]

I know nothing about CPTSD but a quick scan of your list sounds a whole lot like ASD.

Many of us here are not formally diagnosed. We are just self diagnosed and plan to keep it that way for various reasons or are unsure and trying to figure it out. We also sometimes have NTs who just happen to be on the same wavelength mentally.

Autism is apparently caused by the physiological effects of genetic differences. How the mind is constructed basically. But I do find NTs I feel very in sync with. So I think there is a lot more to who we are and how we are alike besides the NT-ND differences.

We also have quite a few NTs come who are trying to learn more about ASD so as to better understand family or loved ones, etc.

So no worries about being an imposter. NTs, NDs and those unsure are welcome. Imposter would only relate to someone purposely trying to deceive, pretending to be on the spectrum, which although rare does happen from time to time. A species of troll I guess.

 

[Gift2humanity]

Hi, everyone. I'm new to the forum and hoping to get some insight regarding CPTSD and autism.

I have been officially diagnosed with CPTSD for quite a while. However, my partner (professionally diagnosed with autism) has pointed out many behaviors that could be traits of autism. We compiled a list together, I'll copy and paste it here:

- Hyperfixation on certain topics.

- Social difficulties, struggles to maintain contact, feeling left out, drained after social interaction.

- Difficulty expressing emotions, especially sadness and feelings that might make me appear vulnerable, extreme emotional reactions.

- Forcing myself to make eye contact even though I'd rather not and it makes me uncomfortable.

- Mirroring facial expressions and social behaviors to try and blend in.

- Extreme difficulty with change.

- Stimming and feeling the need to suppress stims.

- Vocal stims such as repeating words or lines from entertainment I find amusing.

- Sensory issues (difficulty with clothes especially as a kid)

- Preparing jokes or phrases ahead of time.

- Resistance to touch.

- Prefering to be and work alone.

- Routine and rituals, fall back onto same games and shows.

- Light and sound sensitivity.

- Very schedule based, put down minute to minute outlines for vacation with gf. Don't like lateness or schedules going awry.

- Never had a best friend, always wanted one.

- Eccentric fashion.

- Some difficulty reading between the lines.

- Each item I own has a special place and I don't like when people move things around.

- Idiosyncratic use of language, specifically quoting TV shows and movies out of the blue.

- Difficulty sleeping, sometimes due to sensory issues like room temperature, sheets being too wrinkled, piece of dirt in the bed etc.


Of course, I'm not asking anyone on here to diagnose me. That said, I've been having a very difficult time de-tangling whether or not these symptoms could be the result of my CPTSD or might be indicative of undiagnosed autism. I've read through just about every article online that I could find, and I still haven't been able to get any satisfying answers. I now turn to all of you, hoping that those with autism could provide some insight into whether or not the suspicion that I could be autistic is warranted or not.

I feel like I'm going crazy, I'm so confused going back and forth on whether or not I could be autistic. Unfortunately, professional diagnosis is financially out of reach so I have no solid way to truly answer my burning question. I've been very reluctant to adopt the label of 'autistic', simply because I don't want to take up space in a community that I am not a part of. I feel like an imposter, it doesn't seem like I fit in anywhere.

That is a real shame you feel like an imposter.
I think a lot of the things you describe sound autistic in my lay man's view.
It's funny, I am diagnosed with autism, and I want a diagnosis of CPTSD, as my old psychiatrist said I have one, but my current one thinks it's part of the BPD I a diagnosed with.

 

[Sablerose]

Did you steal my list? Just kidding! My whole journey started with my husband looking into to it for a diagnosis. We both realized I have quite the list myself and it goes back my entire life. I know in my heart and soul this is right , this is me. Like others have said, stick around, there are some really awesome people here and you can learn so much from them. My therapist just says ok and yes adhd does have a lot of cross over in parts but it so much more then that if they would just listen better because I have a heck of a time getting the right words out these days. They just never asked the right questions. Give the forums a chance, you might like it here too