Blogs

Too many words about why I self-diagnosed myself and why it took me so long to write about it.

Previously, since my Asperger husband sacrificed his research career to move to my developing country (where nobody here doing his particular field of research; but there are teams doing this in his developed country, he supposed to join the team, but he sacrificed it to move here.. so sad), he said he wanted to go back to work in his country. Previously. If he wants to, he should apply by this month. He was not happy with the state of that research field here, feels so empty and no...

I recently watched a YouTube video by The Aspie World titled ASPERGERS symptoms in children: 5 ways YOU spot Autism, in which one trait of some people with Asperger Syndrome is said to be walking on their tiptoes, especially in their childhood and teenage years. That video unearthed a part of my childhood I had completely forgotten about. I would walk around on my tiptoes a lot when I was a kid (up to when I was around 12 years old), albeit only without shoes on. I can distinctly remember...

Instead of letting things jumbling up into a tighter knot in my mind, let's just jot what are weighing my mind down. The problem of our marriage is a combined set of several problem sets. My husband's: Asperger Foreigner International marriage Moving to a foreign land Moving to wife's country (opposite of the usual norm, where wife follows the husband) Multi-language land: 3 languages needed 1 language (English; we're non-English) for securing job/conversation, 1 other language for daily...

As the whole world starts to disappear from around me and becomes less than reality at the same time as the things around me become seemingly more important and they start feeling as if I’m being watched as if I need to escape as if I need to hide as if the only true escape is to die. The intense reality starts closing in around me getting scarier and scarier, the need to escape getting more and more intense and harder to ignore. Where do I go, what do I do, I pull the closest blanket over...

Considering my birthday present was a sleepless, panicky night full of infinite snot and the total sensory overload that accompanied it. Accursed allergies. Or maybe a brief cold. I genuinely cant tell the difference... the end result is exactly the same. On the plus side, I discovered that it's possible for a nasal clog to abruptly delete itself in the space of a second. Thank you, mystery pill. Too bad I discovered this when sleep time was nearly over. Feh. Seriously though, took...

I am an adult with autism and I don't have really very much reading comprehension. I used to have someone who would sit with me and read the bible every day and then tell me what it meant. But that person left many months ago. I'm so sad and I'm so grieving for the bible and the Holy Spirit. I wish I still had a special friend to study with.

Things are getting very stressful, but not for any of the normal reasons. It's finals month. Finals are normal, we have them every year and around the same time for semester long class sections. I study, but I don't think it's as stressful for me because of my memory. It's not perfect, but I don't have to study as intensely as some of my peers. That's not what's stressing me. I have to go around to all of my professors and ask for a very specific document in a very short time frame. I...

Very early in my career, a decade or more before the turn of the century, I was given a test by my employer to determine, within any project, the level of importance I placed upon the people versus the task. After he gathered the results, I was told by the gentleman who administered the test that he had never seen anyone score so heavily on one side or the other as I did. In taking the test, I scored off the charts on the task side and barely gave any consideration at all to the people side....

Thinking back to my school years, one of my strongest memories is how utterly untalented I was in all things sport-related. But my sport-problems started even before I entered elementary school, especially with swimming. I was perfectly content with my floaties. Being in the water was amazing as long as I had my neon orange arm floats strapped on. I could enjoy the feeling of being weightless without having to worry about drowning. My mom did not share that opinion, so on our first trip to...

Alright. Today’s Monday. I’m on the train to my workplace. It’s jam-packed, people are speaking on their phones, there’s an entire school class in it and I can’t get to my earphones cause the train is too packed to reach for them in my backpack. I’m freaking out. Last night I couldn’t sleep well because my thoughts kept waking me up. I had to change outfits twice before leaving the house this morning because something was always not right. I am a university student who works as a student...

So, today, I'm just gonna ramble about a specific board game I've been into. Why? Because I bloody well can, that's why. Nobody can stop me. Well, maybe Batman could. Yeah, there's other hobbies I havent talked about yet, but they're a bit more difficult to do, so I'll hold off a bit till I've got photos and info sorted. For now... board games. Today's game is Too Many Bones. Sometimes I wonder how they come up with these names. Billed as a "dice-builder RPG", the game very clearly...

I have somewhat of a milestone to celebrate. I've been mentally stable and happy for over two months now, and it's been a while since that happened. I've been feeling like myself again and I haven't been myself for a long time. I enjoy life. I am hungry for new things. I enjoy music again. Hell, I dance and sing to music in my house. And secretly in my office, when no one is there yet, but that's beside the point ;) I have met my new psychiatrist, who will focus on keeping me stable and...

So, last time, I explained the basic Rubik's Cube. As well as my method: only 2 algorithms, but they are VERSATILE. They can be used in many ways... and on almost any puzzle. It's just a matter of figuring out HOW to use them, and making slight tweaks if needed. Which is good, because now things get funky. Case in point, the Megaminx: This intimidating thing is often the second puzzle for those into this hobby (well, those who are into it beyond just the speed aspect). Many more sides...

Okay. Time to talk a bit about hobby #2. This time, we enter the wild world of twisty puzzles. There's some crazy stuff in here, but let's start with the one that everyone knows, and in the process, I'll talk a bit about how I got into this. The original Rubik's Cube. Everyone knows what this thing is, and everyone knows just how it works. Scramble it up by twisting the different faces of the cube, and then attempt to get it back to it's starting state. Everyone knows that. And...