Blogs

iPad time down 45% from last week. The weather’s been helping. Among other things like working on important papers, yard work, books, sewing, et cetera.

I don't believe my current therapist is working out for me. I'm supposed to trust him, but I don't. I haven't trusted the previous one either. My only question is, how long will it take, and what will it take for me to trust them? Trust seems to be an issue with me, even with ordinary stuff like what music I listen to. There doesn't seem to be any other therapists close enough to drive biweekly to, and that doesn't even cover the cost of the actual session. But, back to trust though. Do...

So, I went to the dentist today after a while. Being in the chair reminded me of an earlier time I went, when I was about 6 or 7, I believe. When the dentist was taking X-Rays, the bite-down bit hurt so much I cried, and wouldn't let them put it back in. It still hurts! And, come to find out, I have cavities? 3 of them, apparently. I'll try to floss more. And, my head hurts a lot. I don't know if it was because of the light, the pain, or something else, but I'm not feeling good at all....

Something that is commonly on my mind, thought i'd share and get some thoughts Back when i was around 18 i got into a relationship with a girl online and originally told her i'd never be able to meet her due to my issues and explained things about me and my problems and she was okay with it, However over time i did manage to meet her and push past because it was a real relationship and i wanted it to be serious we dated for about 4 years mostly online with the occasional meetups, However on...

Limiting screen time isn’t the priority project right now. All available effort is currently focused on a more critical goal. I want to work on limiting screen time in the future though. Limiting screen time makes a noticeable difference when I’m able.

Finally a blog i can write with a happy face! The past few days i've been trying to stop dragging myself down and just beam with positivity and it seems to be working so far, Things have been going really well, Even if it doesn't last due to depression being very random i'm trying to make the most of it, I do livestreaming on twitch occasionally and it's took me many many years to get to a point where i can openly talk on it to a point where people don't seem to notice my social problems as...

Firstly, I'd like to thank you all for your kind messages, they made me feel better! And about the school psychologists, I found something out the other day. While they're called psychologists and have the degrees to have that title, the role they play in school is a guidance counselor for kids with IEP's. I've decided to ask my therapist about it the next time I see him, granted he doesn't ask me anything that takes me off topic. I've also put more thought into whether or not I should ask...

So I went down to the Guidance Office in school to ask about the school's psychologists. As I thought, you generally need an IEP to really work with one, unless I had a specific person I wanted to talk to. This just made me think, why would I really want to see them? I think I want to because I'm running out of adults to trust, and depending on how it goes, I could bring up autism. I'd really like to because I feel bad that I'm questioning so much without "doing anything" about it. Ah,...

I feel the need to keep venting some typical daily things i'm struggling with lately so hope nobody minds! This one is a fairly common issue that i always sort of presumed would never happen to me but has.. So i have the whole aspie texture food thing(it's complicated to explain), When i was younger i originally would only ever eat one bowl of cereal and NOTHING else at all, had therapy for it and such for years, Luckily as i got older my taste buds changed or something and i tried new...

I have moved this post to my external blog, Autlanders: Thriving Outside of the Box

It's nothing new to me that I feel "behind" my peers. Socially, emotionally, interest wise. Instead of a regular high schooler (9th-12th, about 14/15-17/18 years old for those who don't know), I feel like I'm 12 or something! I'm 16 though, and I'm afraid of what the future holds. Everyone seems to have some semblance of a plan for after high school, but I don't. Everyone's either employed or looking for a job, and I'm not. Everyone seems to know their sexuality and their interests and...

Focusing available attention on #1 project: volunteering. The work itself will be a joy. That’s not a problem. The sticky wicket was, is, & always will be the social that comes along with the territory. I’ve been brushing up on technique though. It may not make it any easier, but it keeps me constructively occupied.

Lately things have been super rough for me, My mental health really dropped and i slipped back into some.. self harming habits, I'm usually the kind of guy who is always trying to think as positive as i can but it can only work for so long before i snap, And just the general view of my life lately is crushing me, I feel like a bit of a waste as a person, For the first time lately i've started to view my version of Aspergers as a curse, I've always sort of liked the fact that i'm unique but...

So come to find out, my school has psychologists. 4 of them, in fact. I'll try to schedule time with them sooner rather than later. Or, should I wait until next school year? It's getting close to the end right now, and I don't want to have to waste gas and money driving up to the school or wherever over the summer. Not to mention the already tight schedule from family matters. I'm supposed to be co-hosting for the school's talent show tomorrow night, but it doesn't feel real. I've only...

So the show on Saturday was great. My mom got us both seats in the balcony, to the back, so it wasn't too loud! Also, I found out my therapist is going on vacation. I told him about the whole "weird leg" thing, but we didn't really explore it. Would it be worthwhile to talk about what I think is ASD related without directly saying I think I have ASD? I don't know. I feel kind of bad because I want a different therapist, but I think I'll make him upset in some way! Not to mention the fact...