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Unreachable placeI know I'm months late to this, but I just saw your entry here. This is exactly why I have 一期一会 as my title here. It's a Japanese phrase that has...- Grondhammar
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Not deserving things - complicated feelingsI know what you mean about not wanting to bring others down. Hiding all that stuff is something I’ve done all my life. It seems impossible for me...- WhitewaterWoman
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Not deserving things - complicated feelingsHello. I feel like sometimes the things i feel are too depressive and don't want to affect anyone's mood. But i feel like exploding if i dont...- AprilR
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Not deserving things - complicated feelingsApril, hello. This is the first time I’ve looked into this blog section. I don’t really understand it. Why wouldn’t your post be ok in the regular...
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The past few days have been days of inner turmoil, including a fairly intense depression spike. I felt I needed something to at least somewhat directly counter the dense darkness. I remembered early on in my meditation journey, I ran into a technique called Smile Meditation, or Inner Smile. So I...
I saw everyone at thanksgiving. My siblings. The first time since my uncles funeral in April. Which was when I lost my speech, started talking gibberish for two month and started using a walker from the brain injury. My siblings have no asked nor have the seen me sinc ethen. My husband feels...
Table, they are all laid out. Ligjts off flashes like a book memories going by clicking. Why DIDNT HE JUST END ME? Get rid of me. Devour me. A gently bite. A piece of my neck. Enough to draw blood. Sucking, drinking. He enjoys every second. What even are you? Am I just your play thing? Your...
Tonight!
Supercar returns!
So does Fireball XL5!
But wait...with Captain Scarlet, are the Mysterons about to make a return too?
If you are lucky enough to catch a glimpse of MeTV Toons' new Known Strings Attached block, talk about your favourite moments from tonight's episode, and your...
I am so tired from not being able to breath well, nausea, fatigue, brain fog etc. I just want to live like everyone else. Even 34 years was too long for me. I am so tired and i dont feel safe anywhere
I am realizing that my issues with growing up involve a severe case of living in fear. And a compounding issue of self-hatred, along with a delusional belief of others being out to get me. Creating resentment and fear of others.
In this. I have found that being profoundly uncomfortable and...
I feel like i don't deserve some of the things i have. But i believe in God and believe this life is a test. So i convince myself it is not a matter of deserving.
Maybe some people deserve the things i have but that is not my problem. Everything is up to God in life. I am trying to not take...
As I lie awake unable to sleep. Pain dripping over the right side of my body. I say dripping because it feels like my body has been drenched in a vat of corroded battery acid. You know that burning feeling your skin gets when you touch it? The pain that goes to your bone if you hang onto it...
🌈 What Neurodiversity Means to Me
Neurodiversity isn’t just a concept I believe in—it’s the lens through which I now see the world. It’s the rhythm of my son’s footsteps as he paces to self-soothe. It’s the way he lines up his toys with precision, creating order in a world that often feels...
Lay awake. Head pounding from the pressurr.in my brain. Unable to sleep. A tilt of my head and the pressure send a violent pain through my head and a black cloud into my eyes. What to watch? For some reason I find comfort in watching shows on serial killers. Maybe atleast I escaped my predator...
I recently started EMDR. Many years I have heard of this treatment through my therapist. Thinking to myself, it seemed a bit hokey to me. So I researched. Finally, after my speech had been lost from a brain injury and my right side of my body impaired it was suggested that to fix all my...
To start off. I am feeling quite a bit better. Though I have a hard fight ahead.
This fight is me ending my suppression of my own psychosis and other things like my emotions and thoughts. I have to just let go. But also face my thoughts and feelings. Not run from them. And I have been trying...
I forget. Constantly. I forget. He is gone. I tried to call my daddy the other day., more than once. To me he isnt gone. He is still here. I keep calling him and asking for him. Everytime I shut my eyes it is a reset and I think he is alive again. I never said goodbye to him. He is here. Asking...
Adoration
To lean gently upon him awhile
To take his hand, his counsel
To rest one happy moment with him
To release a hundred meaningless concerns
To be still and to be quiet
To listen into the Void
To learn of a thousand things
Never heard before
Legion
There is a part of me that identifies with Legion. Like me on my pathway of becoming, Legion also becomes someone else, something both less and also more. After Legion is set free, is made healthy and whole, Legion is in his right mind. Legion’s internal and personal, demonic tormenters...
I live my life, but from time to time i dream of the magical time in my life and the people i will never see again.
I know even if i were to meet that people again, those moments in time will never come back and they will no longer stir anything in me.
I just wish i can return back to that...