Why does society view autistic people as mentally incompetent?

[grommet]

Society thinks they can’t make decisions for themselves and they think that they are mentally incompetent. Why is that? And this affects them dating and having sexual relationships. What else does society view autistic people when it comes to dating and sex? Like me for example they think of that of me because I am autistic.

I do not know. I think it is something about how I communicate. I am 58 and I am still treated like a child.

 

[Matthias]

Society thinks they can’t make decisions for themselves and they think that they are mentally incompetent. Why is that?

I think it's because 90% of people with autism meet the criteria for a mental health disorder and the other 10% have mental health problems.

And this affects them dating and having sexual relationships. What else does society view autistic people when it comes to dating and sex? Like me for example they think of that of me because I am autistic.

I don't think it affects dating much as you only need to find one person and there are plenty of people in the world who have mental health problems that you can date. People who are mentally well tend to notice when others are mentally ill and avoid them. They will probably treat you the same way even if you never told them you were autistic.

 

[Jumpinbare]

I just dont understand how someone doesn't know how they feel, we're just different like that, which is fine.

I never know when someone asks, because I haven't been monitoring my feelings, if I even have any feelings just then. I am alexithemic, so if I try to notice how I am feeling, I likely won't know anyway. I had way over-the-top out of control feelings as a child, and deliberately learned to suppress them.

Feelings just aren't relevant to me. Rationality is much more useful and reliable.

 

[dancerxoxo123]

I think it's because 90% of people with autism meet the criteria for a mental health disorder and the other 10% have mental health problems.


I don't think it affects dating much as you only need to find one person and there are plenty of people in the world who have mental health problems that you can date. People who are mentally well tend to notice when others are mentally ill and avoid them. They will probably treat you the same way even if you never told them you were autistic.

Yeah like what mental health problems?

 

[Matthias]

Yeah like what mental health problems?

As far as mental disorders, I think the most common in people with autism are depression, social anxiety disorder, and various personality disorders. As far as other mental problems, I'm referring to things like cognitive distortions, negative attitudes, looking down at others, stubbornness, self-absorption, self-hatred triggering emotions in response to constructive criticism, and heightened emotional sensitivity in general. Of course, not everyone with autism has all these problems and it's likely that everyone without autism has some type of mental health problem as well since no one is perfect.

I posted my response because I used to think people disliked me because I was autistic but later realized it was due to mental health problems that were within my power to change. After working to overcome those mental health problems, people respond more positively to me, like me more, and treat me better which makes it much easier to get along with others.