Past determining my future

[Markness]

I am also worried I am getting too old to have dreams about romance and intimacy.

 

[velociraptor]

How can I feel hopeful after feeling like I haven’t made any progress this year?

Maybe you made progress elsewhere but haven't realized it because you are fixated on one thing?

 

[Markness]

My siblings keep getting to experience different events with their spouses as well as their kids. Whenever a new family photo comes up on the family text feed, I am not in it. I wonder if I, along with a girlfriend or wife, will ever appear in one?

 

[Mary Terry]

@Markness - Why don't you pose the family and yourself for some family photos, and you post them on the family text feed? Get your parents to take some photos that include you and post them.

 

[Markness]

@Markness - Why don't you pose the family and yourself for some family photos, and you post them on the family text feed? Get your parents to take some photos that include you and post them.

Are you asking about my biological parents? If so, my mother would be the only realistic option. My father doesn’t live with in the area anymore (He and my mother divorced many years ago.) and he actually dismisses me as a person.
He actually made fun of me because he still get dates at his age (Even though he will not exclusively date anyone and he’s gotten in trouble when the women he sees find out.) while I can’t.

I wish I could prove him wrong.

 

[VictorR]

Are you asking about my biological parents? If so, my mother would be the only realistic option. My father doesn’t live with in the area anymore (He and my mother divorced many years ago.) and he actually dismisses me as a person.
He actually made fun of me because he still get dates at his age (Even though he will not exclusively date anyone and he’s gotten in trouble when the women he sees find out.) while I can’t.

I wish I could prove him wrong.

Based on what you described here and elsewhere, your father is a rake and a bully and is no role model for you or anyone else. You need not seek his approval. Nor do you need to prove him wrong as the moment you do so he'll likely find something else to pick on you over.

 

[Markness]

I was considering the possibility of accepting that I will remain single for the rest of my life but I just can’t do it. I am too psychologically attached to the desire to have someone special in my life.

 

[Mary Terry]

I was considering the possibility of accepting that I will remain single for the rest of my life but I just can’t do it. I am too psychologically attached to the desire to have someone special in my life.

You need to accept that possibility and find pleasure and self-worth in your life. If you appear "happy" and value yourself, you're more likely to attract the attention of someone who is also looking for a relationship.

 

[Mary Terry]

Are you asking about my biological parents? If so, my mother would be the only realistic option. My father doesn’t live with in the area anymore (He and my mother divorced many years ago.) and he actually dismisses me as a person.
He actually made fun of me because he still get dates at his age (Even though he will not exclusively date anyone and he’s gotten in trouble when the women he sees find out.) while I can’t.

I wish I could prove him wrong.

Ignore your father. You outgrew him many years ago.

Ask you mother and your siblings to take some family photos that include you.

 

[Markness]

It’s 6:00 in the morning and I am still up. I just can’t stop thinking about if I’ll ever have someone who loves me in my life.

 

[Mary Terry]

It’s 6:00 in the morning and I am still up. I just can’t stop thinking about if I’ll ever have someone who loves me in my life.

You had a bad night, stuck in a mental loop. It's a new day so please try something different today to redirect your thoughts. Maybe take a very long walk outdoors?

 

[Judge]

I am also worried I am getting too old to have dreams about romance and intimacy.

That is something controlled by your heart and mind. Not the aging process itself.

Unless of course your heart and mind decide otherwise.

 

[Markness]

You had a bad night, stuck in a mental loop. It's a new day so please try something different today to redirect your thoughts. Maybe take a very long walk outdoors?

It won’t be very long but I can still take a walk at the park before I go into work.

 

[Markness]

I managed to take more walks yesterday and today.

 

[Markness]

I just wish things went better for me over the summer. Instead, I got pushed back to square one after a brief promising spell.

 

[Xinyta]

I just wish things went better for me over the summer. Instead, I got pushed back to square one after a brief promising spell.

Be happy for the small things. Life doesn't bend to us. Life barges in without appology and looks you in the eye asking "What are you going to do about it?"

What are you going to do about it?

 

[Markness]

Be happy for the small things. Life doesn't bend to us. Life barges in without appology and looks you in the eye asking "What are you going to do about it?"

What are you going to do about it?

I really don’t know what to do and a lot of potential opportunities for this year either got denied to me or were sabotaged.

 

[Mary Terry]

I really don’t know what to do and a lot of potential opportunities for this year either got denied to me or were sabotaged.

You just need to keep finding opportunities to meet and mingle with other people. Sometimes our plans get derailed but that's not a reason to stop trying. Think about topics you can use to keep a conversation going.

 

[Xinyta]

I really don’t know what to do and a lot of potential opportunities for this year either got denied to me or were sabotaged.

Let me refocus you on the question:

What are YOU going to do about it?

Not what you think others are going to do. Not what the past is telling you. What are you, in this moment, going to do about this situation? What are you capable of? What are you willing to do to change this? You have time still for the future. But what could you do in this present moment to make that future look brighter? One small thing at a time. One step at a time.