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Featured How many of you finally admit you will never be in a relationship or married.

Discussion in 'Love, Relationships and Dating' started by Tony Ramirez, Jan 2, 2021.

  1. grommet

    grommet Well-Known Member

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    Quite a record :) (a joke for the older people here)
     
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  2. Skittlebisquit

    Skittlebisquit Dancing is exercise

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    We likely have much in common i too live far away as a hermit. Hikikomori? I accept you as you already are. Who here has done the " what i want in a partner excercise?
     
  3. Fino

    Fino Alex V.I.P Member

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    You took it too literally. She was just saying that you're great.
     
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  4. Slyfox

    Slyfox Well-Known Member

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    unless society suddenly stops caring about money, ill be alone forever it seems :(
     
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  5. Owliet

    Owliet Active Member

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    It would be nice to be in a relationship. I know my mom keeps bringing it up and I do understand her concerns because I am also worried about them too but I’m not sure that right now that I’m currently able to deal with friendships and relationships with my current mindset. Of course, things will improve and obstacles are overcome...or attempted to be overcome. I’m worried that I’ll end up in an abusive relationship like I experienced back in university, because I didn’t know that it was during the time, and I allowed myself to be used— thinking it was what people normally did. It wasn’t and I ended up being hurt, having a STI and feeling embarrassed. However, I have learnt valuable lessons from this experience, and whilst I can’t guarantee that it won’t happen again, I’ll be more careful and more aware. I do need to put myself out there more, because they’re not going to come knocking.
     
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  6. sport

    sport Active Member

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    I never had relationship's in high school only friend .I then ran in to young female who was very manipulative.I was not able to see it so was later slid to the wayside.
     
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  7. zozie

    zozie Well-Known Member

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    I dunno, sometimes solitude is preferable, but I will not discount your loneliness—not my intention to invalidate.

    I had one boyfriend my senior year of high school, sort of on-and-off. He recently died of a meth overdose. I had a child with him before he turned to hard drugs. She just turned 19 last month.

    I married someone else shortly after delivering said child, and was married for 8 years. It wasn't that great. More or less like a business relationship, with a bit of "I'm afraid for my safety" thrown in at random times. Had two more children, both teenagers now.

    Been divorced for 11 years. Dated twice in that time, both extremely intense and confusion relationships. After getting the right treatment for PTSD, I discovered how much I enjoy my own time, so I guess I've accepted that I'll be alone, at least for the time being.

    The past relationships I've had have been quite upsetting and exhausting. I don't think I want another one if it's anything like the previous ones. Then again, I've only just understood my neurodivergence, and getting different needs met will likely lead to a different kind of partnership, if it happens.

    Still, I like it with just me and my kids. When they move out, who knows?
     
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  8. Dadamen

    Dadamen Well-Known Member

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    Sometimes it is better to be alone than with manipulative friends. I remember being in a gang with 8 boys that I thought to be my friends, but they made fun of me. Unfortunently, they go to my class so, I still can't avoid them. I was with them mostly because one of them played football for Dinamo Zagreb these days, the club that I like. This guy was a my real friend, but when 8 of them became a gang, I was out and had to leave that friend too. This is the problem with those high school gangs and fitting in.
    P.S. Sorry for wirting a bit off topic
     
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  9. Slyfox

    Slyfox Well-Known Member

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    been using dating sites(10+) for years and had zero results :(
     
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  10. hatfullofrain

    hatfullofrain Well-Known Member

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    Church girls don't want to look too forward. It depends on your area, but there's this delicate balance between looking kinda interested and not wanting to be labelled as too forward.

    I have no idea how these people ever get together. I mean, they do, there are couples at churches obviously, but my single friends just don't talk to each other because they don't want to look like creeps or look like desperate, stupid girls who are obsessed with finding a husband.
     
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  11. Dadamen

    Dadamen Well-Known Member

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    Love unfortunently can't be forced and real love can't be online.
     
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  12. Joshua Aaron

    Joshua Aaron ️Autistic Pansexual, Young Tiefling Warlock, CG V.I.P Member

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    Considering I have a girlfriend, I don't think I will ever accept that. Can't accept something is is blatantly disproven by extremely, EXTREMELY obvious evidence.
     
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  13. Dadamen

    Dadamen Well-Known Member

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    When it comes to relationships at is partially about the luck. If you are lucky too find someone to love, good for you. Some NTs never get into the relationship while many aspies do.
     
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  14. zozie

    zozie Well-Known Member

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    My sister married a guy she met online. The first time they met in person, they got engaged. They just celebrated their 10-year anniversary.

    Though I generally agree that online isn't the place for real love, apparently it is a starting place for some.
     
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  15. Tony Ramirez

    Tony Ramirez Christian with Asperger's Syndrome

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    I talked to single girls I meet at life group, and they say the same thing. Even mentioned to them why they don't talk to single guys, and they say they are afraid to approach you. You're afraid to approach them then nothing happens.

    But couples or girls who are married always come up to me which becomes quite annoying as I am tired of talking to them as they already have a partner.

    Of course people here have to post without reading the question I have to hear from people here like "my wife", "I fell in love". If you read the actual question I wanted to hear from people who admit I will never be in a relationship but of course the married people here have to ruin it.
     
    Last edited: Jan 5, 2021
  16. Tony Ramirez

    Tony Ramirez Christian with Asperger's Syndrome

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    Bully for her. Similar crap happened to someone at life group, but he got to live with her, they are not sexually active following their faith. There engaged. I am tired of hearing that crap.
     
  17. Aspychata

    Aspychata Serenity waves, beachy vibes

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    It looks like you have a life pal. That cutie sitting on your chest Tony.
     
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  18. Tony Ramirez

    Tony Ramirez Christian with Asperger's Syndrome

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    But I have a male cat on me. I have another male cat who also lies on me too. Their brothers.
     
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  19. Dadamen

    Dadamen Well-Known Member

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    I have a friend who once met a girl online and called her "his girlfriend" but I think it wasn't really his girlfriend because they never met live.
     
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  20. Owliet

    Owliet Active Member

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    You can’t dismiss other people and their experiences just because it doesn’t fit with your view that you’re never going to find anyone. Your question was not worded like “admit it I’ll never find love” for people to say “yeah or nope”, and whilst it does hurt that people have and can be in a relationship and you’re not, I think dismissing their own experiences is closing it off. I think it shows that people with ASD can establish a relationship with someone, and even if there’s a lot of effort and work that has to be put in...and it may have a lot of rejections or various misunderstandings and losses of potential people interested in you, it still shows that it’s possible. I get feeling disappointed, I get feeling bitter about it because it works for others so easily and not for you but it shows that there’s always hope. And I say this as someone who’s first experience with a “relationship “ was not a relationship, I was used Sexually and on the verge of strangulation because he liked it that way and without protection because he always took it off during because he didn’t like the feel, But never wanted to do anything like go for a coffee or see a movie...and I stupidity thought it was all normal. Not out of desperation but I genuinely believed that was what people did. So seeing positive stories from people who have had to work at it but be rewarded in a positive and loving relationship that’s healthy...is a good teaching experience.


    im reluctant to try online dating. I’m of the same mindset that if you meet someone online but never in person, is that dating? But for some people it is.
     
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