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Anyone on the spectrum suffer through this too?

Oh yes... And while you could totally deal with it, it could take years of exercising.
Now, when I have a wife who's even more messy, I'd say the better way is to start communicating with messier people first.
 
I am a very messy eater. My wife always laughs when we are at a restaurant and the plates are taken away after we finish. My table area looks like a Pollock painting, while her area is clean. However, I have learned to chew with my mouth closed and I do use my napkin (or typically several napkins) to wipe my mouth rather than my sleeve. The messiness probably cannot be helped, but the other table etiquette can be learned over time. I know from experience.
 
The messiness probably cannot be helped
You'll have to forgive my ignorance on this, I'm a very neat and clean person that gets anxious and frustrated with messy people. Why can't it be helped? Can't you eat slower and have plates/bowls closer to you? And why is there a tendency to leave the mess there (at least by the messy people I know)?
 
I am shamefully a messy eater, but for me, it comes from childhood issues and I find that I have to eat my food fast, but also I enjoy food and thus, just get on with it and my husband is always telling me to use my napkin, but there is a snag. I feel sick seeing a food stains on the napkin; even my own and in fact, if I was opposite someone like me, I would want to sit else where, because I would start retching, so there are double standards going on with me.

I have always wanted to be a dainty lady, but sadly, due to aspergers, I am quite the opposite!
 
I am a messy cook,

Me too!

My brother in law use to say: a messy cook is a good cook, because they care more about the cooking than the cleaning ( yes, he was messy and also a good cook). So, that is what I like to say, when accused that I am messy in the kitchen and besides, it is me that has to clean it lol
 
For some reason, I decided to buy some white clothes for Summer. My white jeans are already stained. Literally, within an hour of wearing them for the first time, I stained them.
I have two small children, but it’s a running joke in our house that I am why we can’t have nice things.
 
Asperger noted that clumsiness was a common characteristic in the children he was seeing. As for me, things have a disturbing habit of leaping out of my hands and throwing themselves against the floor. The more expensive or delicate, the more they tend to do this.

With food, I tend to leave the table with crumbs and stains on my shirt. Once at an exploration camp in the Northern Canada wilderness, after breakfast I discovered I had half a day survival rations stuffed in my beard.
 
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I dread finding a clothing item I really like. I know I will ruin it with a coffee/tea stain or grass, tree sap almost immediately. :D
 
I tend to be clumsy as well when I eat, accidentally knocking over a drink with my elbow and spilling food off a spoon or fork when it’s about to enter my mouth.

YES, YES, YES! I am not aware of when I do it but I always end up with food all over my top. I drop everything I pick up. I knock over everything in front of me. However, I was blaming fibromyalgia for these things.
 
I'm not sure. I'll eat/drink lots of things that have the potential to stain a white shirt, but every single time I eat something with ketchup while wearing a white shirt, I know I'll be Spray n' Washing that thing after my meal.
thats too funny somehow that reminds of Pikachu and his ketchup lmao.
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it also like my dad who wears white shirt and somehow always spills on white shirt but every other shirt he never spills.
 
My eldest daughter, yes.

She might tuck a napkin or tea towel in the front of her blouse/ t-shirt before eating. (Saves having to get changed)

I may pour some tea down the front of my clothes.
My hands/arms have played their role before my mouth was ready to drink.
 
Nope, I have the opposite problem: I am a very methodical eater.

For example, give me a plate consisting of a grilled chicken sandwich, pickles, potato salad, and and a porter/Russian stout. I'll eat my food in such a way where it balances out salty and sweet. So it'll look like this:
1. Take a bite of my chicken sandwich.
2. Take a bite of potato salad.
3. Take a bite of a pickle.
4. Very strong taste, so take a drink of a porter/Russian stout.
5. Repeat.

I am also a neat freak.
 
You'll have to forgive my ignorance on this, I'm a very neat and clean person that gets anxious and frustrated with messy people. Why can't it be helped? Can't you eat slower and have plates/bowls closer to you? And why is there a tendency to leave the mess there (at least by the messy people I know)?

Well, the harder you try to be neat (or whatever you're trying to do), the harder it seems to get! :eek: :rolleyes:

I used to work in a retail store, (huge mistake, the place made me sick) we had to straighten the items on the shelves so that there wouldn't be any "empty" spaces, and it would look neat. Well, I couldn't do this as fast as the Managers thought I should and I had to keep reminding them that if I tried to move any faster, stuff would start flying off the shelves!! This was several years before I learned that I was Autistic, so they didn't believe me! That job was Horrible, just like in School, I was in Constant Pain! Too Bright, Too Loud, the floors (concrete) had me limping most of the time, and the Managers were emotionally abusive!
 
I'm pretty neat as an eater. Occasional spills But I prefer to be pretty clean as an eater. I have decent enough coordination but I'll never be an athlete.
 
If I really take my time and am VERY mindful of what I'm doing, I can generally get through a meal with manners that would please future in-laws. However, its still very possible that I will find a way to spill a glass of wine on someone. Has happened before, and a stranger got the wine.

If I'm not eating with people who matter, I can generally eat cleanly but will have to wipe my mouth afterwards. If something is especially tasty, I'm not above licking the plate, although I now know enough to do that in the kitchen where no one can see me do it. I do have coordination problems with my hands, so utensils can slip and chopsticks go haywire, but overall its not something anyone one notice as being "abnormal". Just clumsy. Several times I've gone to take a drink out of my straw, and stuck it up my nose accidentally! Once I even got it in my eye....with glasses on....

My mother is even worse. She always ends a meal with something in her cleavage or down her front. Its a joke with us all now.

So yeah, messy eaters here. So I love my food so much I save it for later on my face.....
 
I've always been worse than any of my kids when they were learning. I just need a body bib. I can't eat without looking bad even if I don't wear it. I tip drinks with straws and lids and still get it on me. I don't know why I do it. I know better. It's on my arm/sleeve...in my lap...my hair if it's down. I'm surprised anyone will eat with me out in public. I'm lost past worry or embarrassment. At 47, it's not going to change now. People will either watch me in amazement, entertainment, or leave...lol
 
Nope, I have the opposite problem: I am a very methodical eater.

For example, give me a plate consisting of a grilled chicken sandwich, pickles, potato salad, and and a porter/Russian stout. I'll eat my food in such a way where it balances out salty and sweet. So it'll look like this:
1. Take a bite of my chicken sandwich.
2. Take a bite of potato salad.
3. Take a bite of a pickle.
4. Very strong taste, so take a drink of a porter/Russian stout.
5. Repeat.

I am also a neat freak.


Take a four sided die.

New hobby.
 

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