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The Gentle and Brave Writer

Sabrina
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Aspergers & Autism

My nine-year-old kid plucked part of his eyelashes out on Sunday. It was not the first time, but the second. The first time was when he learned that his best friend was changing schools. As a consequence, he plucked out 90% of the eyelashes in one eye, and half of them in the other.
 Back...
Sabrina
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Aspergers & Autism
I know I come out as an easy going person, or, more accurately, as a push-over. Nothing could be farther from the truth. When I feel that someone is trying to dominate me, manipulate me, or plain simply, doesn’t respect my boundaries, I walk away. Plain and simple. When that situation used to...
Sabrina
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Day to Day Life
Writing in anonymity has become a way to take care of myself. Every time I type a word, it's like combing my hair, or brushing my teeth. Sometimes it's like taking a hot bath for my soul, which is good since I don't have a bathtub. I decided to invest in a full size mattress for myself, so I can...
Sabrina
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Aspergers & Autism

Checking my Whatsapp chats I've realized that I have three friends that I interact with, in the present: one is a college friend that lives in the other side of the Atlantic, a virtual friend that also lives in the other side of the Atlantic, and a friend (mom of a friend of my daughter's).
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Sabrina
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Day to Day Life
I have two friends who used to be a couple, who were friends of my ex and I when we were a couple too. We don’t live in the same country anymore, but when I learned that they separated more or less at the time than we did, I contacted them (separately). What she said about their separation was...
Sabrina
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General
The relationship with my dad was based in the exchange of knowledge, mostly him helping me out with school subjects, or him recommending me books. It was never an equal exchange. He mostly downloaded information on me (aspie style) and I received it. I used to receive it gladly because I...
Sabrina
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Day to Day Life
I feel safe with my date of these days. What I mean by “safe” is the physical part of being safe, and I’m not referring to the lack of fear of being abused by him (that’s another horrible fear, but not the subject of this post. To clarify doubts, I feel safe with him in that aspect too). I mean...
Sabrina
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Day to Day Life
I had this beautiful aspie conversation with my aspie son (he doesn't know he is an aspie, or that I'm an aspie too). "I want to be left alone in school sometimes and they don't let me". "Don't you have a place to be alone during recess?" "No. And during class, as they say I'm the smartest in...
Sabrina
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Day to Day Life
There's several situations that worry me at the moment, but a few seconds ago, I got swept by "my" locker at the pool where I come to swim everyday. It looked beautiful, simple and colored coordinated. It could become an original picture of these times, not just mine, but everybody's. Like those...
Sabrina
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Today, May 10th, is Mother’s Day in México, there’s no school, and it’s a national holiday for many, except for restaurants. The ex didn’t take the kids to buy me a present and I resent him for that. He didn’t do it for my birthday either… after 18 years of me always doing something for him to...
Sabrina
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I was a bad mom last night and this morning. My fuse was very short and I got exasperated at the most menial things. They’re kids, for crying out loud, what’s wrong with me? I know what’s wrong. I saw the ex yesterday, after weeks of not seeing him, and he didn’t even turn the his head to...
Sabrina
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Day to Day Life
I’m separated and so are you. I want to move forward, start anew. You want your wife to continue fighting. But she just can’t. She doesn’t have any strength left. You see me and you see your wife. You see my ex and you see yourself. You want me to go back to him, because that’s what you...
Sabrina
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Aspergers & Autism
"It's very difficult that kids that age know what they want to be when they grow up" said my dad, sixty-seven, when I was telling him that my daughter, thirteen, already knew what she wanted to do when she grows up. Today, in the locker of the pool where I go swimming, I heard two women...
Sabrina
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Sopranos and tenors always make my soul soar. Right now, the owner of the incredible voice that I’m listening to is Katherine Jenkins. There’s magic in the melody, but there’s something even transcendental when one understand the lyrics. French, Italian, Spanish, and even English, transmit a...
Sabrina
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Tonight I feel lonely. I'm out here in my balcony, with a stunning view of the city at night. Usually I would have enjoyed it. But tonight I feel so lonely. I love being alone, when I want to be alone. That is a lot more frequent than it is for most people. I like to write, read, travel, eat...
Sabrina
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I look fine, really. Actually, I'm so resilient than even I don't see my own psychological wounds. But they are there, and they are still bleeding. When my mom and dad came to visit us during the holidays, I noticed that my mom looked significantly older than the last time that I saw her. She...
Sabrina
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‘I’m going to talk to him. Yes. I can do this, I can do this’. I swim everyday but I usually don’t talk to anybody when I go. Actually, that’s one of the blessings of swimming, no spontaneous chitchat that might bring me down from the clouds. The thing is: I like my clouds. They are nice and...
Sabrina
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I.. connect… the… dots…late… but I do. I found the “mystery” of why my ex husband didn’t want a wedding ring. For you, my dear reader, it might be obvious: because he doesn’t want women to know he’s married, right? But not for me. I can have something in front of me and still not be able to...
Sabrina
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I now have a map with all the places with hidden mines that I have to avoid in my love life. These mines are charming, exciting, intelligent men, that had unloving mothers. I also have in my map a destination: a man with his feet on Earth, capable of love, (since he received lots of it when he...
Sabrina
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As I promised, I am not trying to make you come back to me. You flew, and I just want to say good bye from the distance. First of all, I want to say thank you. Only you and I know how much you saved me, how much you changed my life: there is a before you, and an after you. You were my Peter...

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Sabrina
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