"It's very difficult that kids that age know what they want to be when they grow up" said my dad, sixty-seven, when I was telling him that my daughter, thirteen, already knew what she wanted to do when she grows up.
Today, in the locker of the pool where I go swimming, I heard two women talking: "He's always been interested in Japan, even started studying Japanese when he was little. Now he's studying gastronomy and dreams of going over there to continue his studies. I tell him, why so far away? But he says we'll continue talking and that I can go and visit him. The important thing is that he realizes his dreams". The other woman answered: "There's people that know what they want to do ever since they are kids. I have a nephew that wanted to be a pilot ever since he was very little. Now he's a military pilot, but his dream is to work for Lufthansa".
What a difference from what my parents said to me when I told them that I wanted to study Literature when I was eighteen years old. I had just won a full scholarship to go study it in Spain, and all they said was, with indifference, "we support whatever you want", with that face that said what my dad commented about my daughter: "kids your age don't know what they want". I also had a boyfriend back then that was staying in our city to study Medicine, and he wanted me to stay with him (he even cried about it). So I did the "rational" thing to do, for someone that was the best student of her class, and should not waist potential: I started studying Medicine too.
Two years later I quit and started International Studies (another "rational" decision, since there was a better chance of making money with it than with Literature). Nineteen years have passed after my graduation, and the only thing I've ever been constant at, besides being a mom, it's writing. When you really want to do something, you end up doing it, even if that doesn't produce any money.
I can't help imagining what would have happened if my parents had supported and encouraged me to follow my dreams from an early age. I know they couldn't have done any better, but I can.
My daughter wants to work at Pixar. Of course it's a dream that is not "rational", like mine of becoming a writer ( I have become a writer, BTW, I even published a book in Kindle; I'm not making any money, though). But I know that she will have animation and creative work in her head forever. She was born with it, and trying to force her to be a more compliant member of society (a.k.a. picking a career with more probabilities of making money), only will lead her to frustration. I have to watch out, though: she is, like I was, at the top of her class, and well meaning people might make her think that she needs to study a hard career, so she doesn't waste her potential. It's essential that she believes that the only person that knows what she wants, it's herself. Even if she's just thirteen.
I believe in her, I know that she can take whatever road of life she wants. I want to be there to support her, and most of all, encourage her. The more confidence she has in herself, the stronger will be the steps that she takes towards her dreams.
Go for it R! You can do it!
