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would you want to be rich?

Pats

Pats

Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
I'm just curious. I know it's common for us to not feel the need to dress like everyone else and wear make up and have our appearance fit in with current trends and fashion. And I was just wondering if the same applies to possessions. If you could, would you want to be rich and live in a mansion, drive an expensive car, have servants, etc, etc?
I never did. I don't know if it's because of the autism or because I've learned how unimportant material things are. I lost everything I owned down to the clothes on my back 4 times in my adult life so I know how quickly you can lose everything and how easily things can be replaced. I've lived in really nice homes and I've lived in a camper and on a truck. None of that ever mattered to me. But even when I was younger I never had a desire to be rich.
I never understood 'keeping up with the Jones'. The neighbor buys a new car, you have to buy a new car. Neighbor buys a boat, you gotta have a boat.
I don't think people really believe me when I tell them I would not want those things and I'm really not envious of those who have a lot. Good for them - if that's really what makes them happy. I just personally don't see it. I walked through an aunts new house not too long ago and it's huge. Even the closets were bigger than my bedroom - but they had to be to hold all the hoards of everything they ever owned. They have closets full of their only son's toys in original boxes and not touched since their son played with them 50 years ago. Why???
Anyhow - again, just curious if it's just me or if it's something common with people on the spectrum.
 
At one time or another most everyone indulges in such fantasies. But equally few of them likely ponders the headaches of money management that comes with any sudden and massive gain in wealth.

Where perhaps the most important decision is in determining who to trust when it comes to the complexities of managing and investing huge sums of money. Not to mention how grim the realities are of most people who win lotteries who statistically lose most or all of their newfound wealth in five years or less.

Here's why lottery winners go broke

It's a rather abstract question to me for one simple reason. Rich or poor I try my best to live within the limits of the resources I actually have, as opposed to what I don't have.

How's that for an Aspie answer? :p
 
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That's two different questions:
Would I want to be rich?
Would I want to live in a mansion, drive expensive car, have servants etc?

I'd be OK with having a magnificent amount of money/perpetually large income.
I would not find it necessary to have servants, a fancy car, or a mansion.

I could do various other things that would please me.
Change the property, physically, that I live on.
Make a living place that suits me.
 
NOPE - I'd just like to be comfortable. Money doesn't buy you love or happiness. Studies have shown that whilst happiness increases with diminishing returns until you hit a salary level of around £70Kpa (about US$91K), beyond that point happiness either stays constant or starts to diminish.
I would be happier owning my own house again rather than renting, I'd find a couple more rooms handy but any more than that and I'd never use them. I'm happy with my car, I eat well, I enjoy my interests and hobbies which don't break the bank. Maybe I'd soup up my main PC to make editing and rendering smoother perhaps?
But nah - being rich is a mugs game. Pity the fool who sits on his fortune and covets it. Being comfortable and not having to worry about money would do me fine :)
 
I would want to be rich for the security and freedom. Travel would probably be my biggest luxury. The best medical care. I'd have a really good gaming set up with a big curved screen and a good chair. I'd have a personal care giver. Clothes wouldn't change because I dress for comfort. Mostly I'd like the ability to do what I want when I want to do it. Like charter a boat to go to the San Jan Islands or wherever if I had a notion to visit. A good vehicle, like a Volvo, which the care giver would have to dive. That's about all I can think of.
 
I definitely would want to be rich, but only if I could be secretly rich, so my friends and family don't know. Mainly, I just want the freedom to retire.

We already make a decent living and are debt free, but we're not extravagant spenders. Money is security for me, so I'm a hardcore cheapskate. We make more than average, but you wouldn't know it from the way we live.

About 15 years ago, we decided to buy a larger house for our growing family. A friend of my wife's considered buying the house, but had to see if they could put together the financing. When she found out we were immediately approved to buy the house, she blurted out, "How can the Rex's afford it? What does Nervous do for a living?" That was a sign to me that we are indeed living frugally and not flaunting what money we do have.
 
Define 'rich'? Do you mean billionaire type rich, born into wealth/self-made to the point that one can throw away a few grand on a daily/weekly basis and not even think twice? Or do you mean anything in the middle/upper middle class where one doesn't have to think too much about spending a few hundred (lets say 700 dollars/pounds) on a fun thing every once in a while (e.g. once a month)?

It's fun to think about being SUPER wealthy I suppose, but honestly, I'm more happy with things I have and use. I attribute far more meaning and attachment to things that MEAN something to me, old things from my old home. They're priceless. No big mansion or yacht can ever trump that. Bigger houses are tiring, having grown up in small apartments I refer that, even though I could afford more. I like to be comfortable and I learnt that having less things with more meaning is far more rewarding than having clutter everywhere of pointless things that were used maybe once.
I came from a very humble upbringing, but my dad is a self-made man who did come to earn substantial amounts, so I've seen both sides. Not the billionaire wealthy, but the -you don't have to work if you're careful with what you have- type of wealthy. I'm so grateful not to have stress and relative freedom not to worry about needing a job, but having said that I am careful and do not buy things I don't need. I still think less is more. I don't need big flashy things, so long as they work and are useful, then that's all that's required.
 
Our society (USA) seems to value having a lot of stuff for some reason. The millenials have tried to replace stuff with "experiences", but their definition of that is very materialistic, they will build a "tiny house" and outfit it with very expensive appliances and fixtures, they will spend lots of money to go to a place and then spend their time taking selfies to post on social media. It seems as if today's young are far more materialistic than youth were in the 80s and early 90s when I was their age.

The thing is, the more money and stuff and "experiences" the upper class has the more drugs they take, and the more unhappy they are. Judge mentioned lottery winners going broke, the Jack Whittaker case is probably the worst, it not only destroyed him and his family but ripped apart the whole town he lived in. The only advantage to wealth I can see is the case of Huguette Clark, a copper mine heiress who shut herself away in a fancy apartment in New York most of her life and controlled who interacted with her, and on her terms.
 
Yes, yes, and yes. But more money is only useful up to a certain point. At some point, you do become quite rich enough to basically buy anything in the world your heart desires.

What matters more past that point isn't what you can buy with your money, it's the power and influence your money allows you to wield. I would consider that quite a headache though, so I would just do what people with money and power do at all levels of wealth and have someone else do all the work and pay them a tiny fraction of what their work is actually worth.

With the money that's not tied up in investments, I would build an enormous underground bunker complex in which to live. I would rather my domicile be an underground mansion in Montana than an above-ground mansion in Malibu or whatever, as I care nothing for keeping up with the Joneses.

Of course, I'd still have a mansion somewhere. But that would just be where everyone thinks I live. A decoy mansion, if you will. I'd probably even commission the creation of some crazy ass animatronic doppelganger from the Japanese. A decoy me, to live in my decoy house. With underground-bunker-complex-money, who's going to tell me I can't do that? Nobody, that's who.
 
I wouldn't mind being rich, but I don't necessarily want a lavish lifestyle. It would just be nice to be able to afford things I want.
 
There was a time in my life when I didn't have much of anything, couldn't afford a bed so I slept on a piece of foam on the floor, my priorities were different. Have everything I need and could possible want. That is a home, a car, good food, a bit of land. The sole reason I might want more money is help friends and family and animals.
 
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Even maintaining large amounts of money under the simplest of conditions would still generate headaches. Imagine having $100,000,000 and requiring it to be kept in 400 different banks just so it's technically federally insured under FDIC regulations with a $250,000 limit.

The bad news: That's a whole lot of monthly bank statements. :eek:
The good news: Luckily (in theory) there are some 5511 federally insured banks. o_O

The really bad news: What if they were all to fail at the same time? :eek:


No worries. You hire someone else to manage it all for you.

Someone you think you can trust. :) Until you can't any more. It happens. :eek:
 
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Okay, yeah. I do wish my income was enough that I could give more to others. But material things is more what I'm talking about, I guess. Most things I have, if anyone were to come in and say they wanted it, I would give it to them. Some exceptions - a table that my son made for me. Looking around, don't really see anything else that I wouldn't be willing to part with. Ok, maybe my computer, too).
And, yes, there are things I'd like to be able to do that I can't afford - so I guess by rich, I do mean - mansion, servants, limos, thousand dollar pajamas and thousand dollar purses and just stuff that other people might envy and wish they could have.
 
I guess the idea of extreme wealth began to wane for me after seeing Eddie Murphy in "Coming To America". When his king and father shouts to the servants, "WIPERS!" :eek:

Uh....no. Just no. :rolleyes:
 
I sorta have experience with this, maybe. It seems to bother people when I talk about this, but I'll do it anyway.

So... my situation. Wealthy family. Specifically my father & stepmother. I live with them in this giant bloated house. The freaking basement is bigger than many mid-sized houses. Hell, the utility room alone is just about the size of the first floor of my mom's place (because, you know, having a bloody cavern for a utility room is a totally practical, sensible design choice). There's a second house up north and a third place on an island nobody seems to have ever heard of off the coast of Florida. They are nice places, even if I utterly despise everything within 50 miles of this house (I'm in Illinois, south of Chicago, where the entire state starts to become endless farmland. Hate it. Always have). I prefer being down on the island as I love the ocean and the beach is a 3 minute walk away. Also it's a very quiet place, that island.

As for lifestyle, mostly I just do what I want. Typically this is all within the context of my hobbies (gaming being my main one, with others being drones, puzzles, and cosplay). I also like anime/gaming conventions, and will go to those (always involves a 3-night hotel stay) whenever I find one I think I can reach. So, basically travelling whenever I feel like it. Overall, I have no practical spending limit (within the realm of sanity, I'm not buying freaking helicopters here). I could go on, but I think you get the idea.

And honestly.... ehhh. I mean, I get why people see this sort of thing the way they do. Everyone tends to assume that if they have enough STUFF, their problems... including emotional and psychological ones... will just sort of float away. But it really doesnt work that way. Dont get me wrong: the stuff I have is nice. I appreciate all these things. But does it solve all of my personal problems? Ye gods, no. Doesnt do a bloody thing. I'm still an anxiety-filled, depressive mess. I'm still in pain half the bloody time (and thus, on powerful painkillers). I still have all of my autistic tendencies. I'm still socially inept. I have gender issues (for lack of a better term) and a very, VERY short fuse. And a memory like a cheese grater (you know, full of holes). No amount of money or STUFF solves problems like these. I mean, obviously just buying some pricey gizmo isnt going to cure autism or something, but so many people seem to believe that if they have enough wealth surrounding them, it'll sorta "drown out" the bad stuff. Sorry, but it just doesnt work that way. At all.

On top of that, there's a sort of... lack of purpose? Function? I dunno. I dont work. Dont need to. Which sounds great, but... there's never any sense of accomplishment, never any sense of having done something useful to someone. And "lots of free time" sounds great on paper, until you actually have it. Mostly, it's really boring. You want a good way to get some additional depression? Free time that you dont know what to do with is a great way to get there.

The stuff that really IS important is stuff that doesnt come from wealth. Family, obviously... I'm very close to all of my immediate family. And there's my dog, who is pretty much the center of my existence. The idea of "servants" has been mentioned in this thread. Well, I'm his servant, essentially. I'd do anything to make him happy (within reason, obviously... it's important to keep dogs healthy). I could honestly rant about him for pages here. All these things that surround me pale in comparison to his fuzzy face.

Same with friends, really. I dont have many friends... I'm about as social as a brick and totally paranoid. But for those few that I do have... they're important.

This also applies somewhat to the STUFF, in a way. Everyone likes the idea of expensive cars. What I have is a van. A fairly basic Toyota. It's a recent acquisition. Just before summer, it was. My previous car just couldnt quite cut it when it came to ice and snow, so it was time to get something with a bit more weight and stability, so that it'd be more safe once the next winter season came. Could have gotten a brand new thing. Instead, I got my grandpa's van (which is like, a 2010 model, I think?). There's nothing particularly special about it and in alot of ways it's clearly outdated (particularly compared to my father's van) but I'd take this over anything. My grandfather cannot drive anymore. He is... very old now. Right around 90, I think. It was finally time for him to stop driving. And though he had quite alot of attachment to that van... it's mine now. 5 quazillion grandchildren, he has (seriously it's a huuuuuge family) and I'm the one that got the van. I could have a better or more impressive car. But I intend on driving that thing until it falls apart. It's a symbol of how much my grandparents care, and it'll be a reminder of them when they're gone. Sentimental value holds more importance than mere monetary value, in my eyes, and that applies to everything. And it's something that I think alot of people either dont realize, or forget about, when they're fantasizing about what they want. Or, when they're considering what they already have, which is often more than they think they have. Hell, all of the things that I would personally consider to be "prized posessions" are things that people would look at, and say "What, THAT piece of junk? But why?" They're worth next to nothing in terms of money and may or may not be falling apart.... but that's not why those things are "prized" to me.


Really, people can fantasize all they want, but as with any fantasy, once you actually get there... it's generally not quite what you thought it'd be.
 
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