Why does society view autistic people as mentally incompetent?

[dancerxoxo123]

Society thinks they can’t make decisions for themselves and they think that they are mentally incompetent. Why is that? And this affects them dating and having sexual relationships. What else does society view autistic people when it comes to dating and sex? Like me for example they think of that of me because I am autistic.

 

[Jumpinbare]

I haven't noticed. I have only been autism aware since my diagnosis nearly 3 years ago. I haven't noticed that people see me as mentally incompetent. But that may be due to me being 68 and having a good vocabulary when I speak. I do actually wear autism t-shirts in public to help dispel the misconception that autism is just a "kid thing", so even strangers know I am autistic.

 

[dancerxoxo123]

I haven't noticed. I have only been autism aware since my diagnosis nearly 3 years ago. I haven't noticed that people see me as mentally incompetent. But that may be due to me being 68 and having a good vocabulary when I speak. I do actually wear autism t-shirts in public to help dispel the misconception that autism is just a "kid thing", so even strangers know I am autistic.

Yeah but why do they think of it for me when it comes to dating and sex?

 

[Wolfiedog]

Since it’s a spectrum, they are erroring on the side caution.

 

[Outdated]

People won't know you're autistic if you don't tell them. Try not telling them and see if they still treat you the same way.

 

[dancerxoxo123]

Since it’s a spectrum, they are erroring on the side caution.

How so?

 

[dancerxoxo123]

People won't know you're autistic if you don't tell them. Try not telling them and see if they still treat you the same way.

Yeah I won’t tell them! I should keep it a secret from them?

 

[Outdated]

Yeah I won’t tell them! I should keep it a secret from them?

I never bother to tell anyone. Sometimes when people get to know me better they might ask me, and then I won't lie, but by then they've already formed their own opinion of me instead of believing a stereotype.

 

[Jonn]

Society thinks they can’t make decisions for themselves and they think that they are mentally incompetent. Why is that? And this affects them dating and having sexual relationships. What else does society view autistic people when it comes to dating and sex? Like me for example they think of that of me because I am autistic.

Some autistics proliferate like rabbits, and nobody stops them.
Not naming names...Musk

Spoiler

Elon Musk has 14 children, according to multiple up‑to‑date sources

 

[NB79]

what they see on the exterior of the person they make assumptions.
i guess you could have Einstein intelligence and some people would still assume things if you don't conform to their 'acceptable' behaviour.

 

[Shamar]

Society thinks they can’t make decisions for themselves and they think that they are mentally incompetent. Why is that? And this affects them dating and having sexual relationships. What else does society view autistic people when it comes to dating and sex? Like me for example they think of that of me because I am autistic.

I blame Hollywood to a great extent. Most movies in the past depict autistics as mentally retarded, mentally incompetent, or just plain weird. They are getting a little better now, but not by much.

 

[vergil96]

I don't have the impression that the society views autistic people as incompetent. Probably the question needs more context. I would guess that if you tell people "I am autistic" and it's not a close friend, that can leave a negative impression or just people don't know how to understand it and misunderstand this statement. They don't know what autism is. Add to it that until not long ago high functioning autism was called Asperger's syndrome and autism was only autism with intellectual disability - perhaps they understand that you have the latter. Most people probably don't know much about the autism spectrum and aren't up to date with all the updates in the diagnoses.

 

[JayLapointe]

How so?

Unfortunately it comes down to the stigma many have thanks in part to crap portrayal of Autistics on the news and tv/movies. They've seen the rainman's and I am Sam's and just assume that is everyone with Autism. That it is a spectrum, many people are simply ignorant of that fact.

Those folks honestly aren't worth your time, and aren't worth getting upset over. Yes they are frustrating, but at the same point with 8 billion people on this planet, some of them are just going to be not nice people in their views. And I am not going to say they are being mean on purpose, well some are but most aren't. "Never attribute to malice what can easily be explained by ignorance".

If they seem receptive to learning more then it's worth having a dialogue with them. A lot won't be receptive, especially the crowd that thinks Autism is something to be "fixed". Best just to ignore them and move on. Be like Bob. Marley and realize that you "Can't please all the people all the time".

Stigma is a tough battle. I am also an addict, alcoholic to be precise. And while I've now been sober for years there are still that type of person that the moment they find out just view me as social pariah. It really bothered me in the beginning, now though it's a screening tool I take pride in. I know my worth, I don't need their approval. So when I meet someone that is going to look down on me and just run with the stigma, I move on as they are not worth my time.

 

[dancerxoxo123]

Yeah I also was diagnosed with borderline intellectual functioning. Mabye they think I’m incompetent because of that?

I don't have the impression that the society views autistic people as incompetent. Probably the question needs more context. I would guess that if you tell people "I am autistic" and it's not a close friend, that can leave a negative impression or just people don't know how to understand it and misunderstand this statement. They don't know what autism is. Add to it that until not long ago high functioning autism was called Asperger's syndrome and autism was only autism with intellectual disability - perhaps they understand that you have the latter. Most people probably don't know much about the autism spectrum and aren't up to date with all the updates in the diagnoses.

 

[dancerxoxo123]

Unfortunately it comes down to the stigma many have thanks in part to crap portrayal of Autistics on the news and tv/movies. They've seen the rainman's and I am Sam's and just assume that is everyone with Autism. That it is a spectrum, many people are simply ignorant of that fact.

Those folks honestly aren't worth your time, and aren't worth getting upset over. Yes they are frustrating, but at the same point with 8 billion people on this planet, some of them are just going to be not nice people in their views. And I am not going to say they are being mean on purpose, well some are but most aren't. "Never attribute to malice what can easily be explained by ignorance".

If they seem receptive to learning more then it's worth having a dialogue with them. A lot won't be receptive, especially the crowd that thinks Autism is something to be "fixed". Best just to ignore them and move on. Be like Bob. Marley and realize that you "Can't please all the people all the time".

Stigma is a tough battle. I am also an addict, alcoholic to be precise. And while I've now been sober for years there are still that type of person that the moment they find out just view me as social pariah. It really bothered me in the beginning, now though it's a screening tool I take pride in. I know my worth, I don't need their approval. So when I meet someone that is going to look down on me and just run with the stigma, I move on as they are not worth my time.

Yeah that’s true I also was diagnosed with borderline intellectual functioning. They may think I’m mentally challenged because of that? I could write fine and still have that. The phycologist diagnosed me with that. I was tested for it 5 times and it said the same thing. They also said I had a mild intellectual disability but I don’t know how true that is.

 

[dancerxoxo123]

I don't have the impression that the society views autistic people as incompetent. Probably the question needs more context. I would guess that if you tell people "I am autistic" and it's not a close friend, that can leave a negative impression or just people don't know how to understand it and misunderstand this statement. They don't know what autism is. Add to it that until not long ago high functioning autism was called Asperger's syndrome and autism was only autism with intellectual disability - perhaps they understand that you have the latter. Most people probably don't know much about the autism spectrum and aren't up to date with all the updates in the diagnoses.

Yeah that’s true what about people with borderline intellectual functioning? Society will think they are incompetent due to that more than autism? That is considered a mild intellectual disability.

 

[JayLapointe]

Yeah that’s true I also was diagnosed with borderline intellectual functioning. They may think I’m mentally challenged because of that? I could write fine and still have that. The phycologist diagnosed me with that. I was tested for it 5 times and it said the same thing. They also said I had a mild intellectual disability but I don’t know how true that is.

Well for what it is worth, you seem to function pretty well to me and I wouldn't have guessed you'd ever been diagnosed with mild disability. You communicate and express yourself very well. But I'm also autistic as well so we're partly on the same wavelength of understanding.

Though unfortunately if you tell a neurotypical that you have a diagnosis of "borderline intellectual functioning" most are going to jump to the worst stereotype they have in their minds and won't give you a proper chance to show who you are and what you really can do. Again, if someone is going to give you a hard time about it, that is a red flag and it is best just to move on and put those folks out of your mind if you can. Which I understand you can't do if it's friends/family/work.

 

[vergil96]

Though unfortunately if you tell a neurotypical that you have a diagnosis of "borderline intellectual functioning" most are going to jump to the worst stereotype they have in their minds and won't give you a proper chance to show who you are and what you really can do.

I agree with that

 

[JayLapointe]

I had a thought just now that perhaps if you are going to tell someone that you have a diagnosis of "borderline intellectual functioning" you could defuse the delivery with a bit of humor. Something like "While I have a diagnosis of borderline intellectual functioning, don't worry I'm on the good side of the border".

I know I mentioned above that often neurotypicals will jump to stigma, but as well often they just don't know how to act. They don't want to say the wrong thing and can be overly cautious and a bit of humor lets them relax and realize there is nothing to worry about. You're just another person. Neurotypicals are a strange lot that often don't deal well with directness.

 

[Neonatal RRT]

Society thinks they can’t make decisions for themselves and they think that they are mentally incompetent. Why is that? And this affects them dating and having sexual relationships. What else does society view autistic people when it comes to dating and sex? Like me for example they think of that of me because I am autistic.

It goes both ways. When I "came out" as autistic to my co-workers, many people commented, "Ohhh, that's why you're so smart." "I've always thought you were a savant." The Sheldon from "The Big Bang Theory" sort of "professor".

On the other hand, you have "The Rainman" and "Love on the Spectrum" and "The Good Doctor" which shows the other side of that coin... people with obvious deficits in certain areas.

Furthermore, when you have public figures who happen to be autistic like Greta Thunberg and Elon Musk creating public outrage and vindictive, malicious people in the media calling them "retarded" and "mentally ill" to discredit them and ruin their reputations within the public realm... it effects all of us.

You have no control over "the court of public opinion" when you have misrepresentations and exploitation of autistic people for entertainment within the media.

Dunning-Kruger phenomenon... when a little bit of knowledge creates an overconfident mind, people make fools of themselves.

Most people know the term "autism", but only a tiny percentage actually know what it means.