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What Not to Say to "I Love You"

[I love you.]

On'tday aysay itway osay oudlay. Ifway ymay ommay earshay, eshay
illway elltay ymay adday andway ehay illway etgay away otshay
ungay andway enthay ou'llyay avehay otay arrymay emay.
 
"I love you."

"Love has many different meanings. Do you wish to form a moirallegiance, a matespritship, or a kismesitude?"

(Sorry if I misspelled any of those, it's been awhile since I brushed up on my quadrants.)
 
"I love you too...in a totally platonic way and I'd love to form an intense, intimate bond with you and maybe cuddle on occasion...I really hope you aren't hoping to get in my pants..."

...You know what, I actually probably would say that, so...
 
I'm not sure what to say in response. I don't want to tell you that I love you too, because I don't, and don't want to lie to you. What would you like me to say?
 
(I love you)
You'll need to do better than that, every man I give a discount to says that as he pays me at the end of the night.
 
[I love you.]

Ohhhh. A game, right?
This is a game? Some kind of coded
guessing game. Let's see. The first word has one letter.
Maybe that stands for a name.
OK. The next word has 4 letters, but it's the 2nd word in the sentence,
so that probably means.....divide by two. So----a word of 2 letters.
"Is" has two letters.
Now, the last word, the 3rd word, has 3 letters. That's probably true.
Name (of somebody) is....something that has three letters.
I've got it. Trixie is out.
Well, let her in. You can't just let the dog stand there on the front step
all night. Let her in.
I don't know why you couldn't have just said so in the first place.
All that guessing business. "I love you." Really......
 
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