MariaX
New Member
The reason I am making this is because after a few short replies to a previous post of mine, I decided to list out some of my biggest 'symptoms' that I tend to notice. I myself am only a Junior in high school and I feel as though I do not know enough about this to be able to self diagnose myself, even though I have done a lot of research. I was wondering if any of you guys had any insight as to what you may think of this. Thank you ^^
I have always been an anxious person. It was only when I started high school that I began to get very stressed out to the point where I basically had anxiety (which makes sense because my mom also has very bad anxiety that got worse during her teen years). But apart from school I have always been bad at social situations and communication. I have never made friends that easily which is surprising because sometimes I enjoy other people, especially new people. I find them fascinating and a lot of the times I do this thing where I like to "study" them. Everybody is so different and I like figuring out what makes these people different and unique. I guess, in a way, it has been what helped me get through social situations because I sometimes catch myself mimicking these characteristics that I see others find appealing in people. I have been told by my friends that I sort of "morph" into a slightly different version of them, if that makes sense. At this point, overall I come off as a very normal person. Even so, when I come across social situations with people I do not know I get very frustrated because I cannot keep a conversation going and sometimes I don't even want to. Especially right now because I don't like being in very large groups.
That brings me to another point. My parents often times drag me to these huge parties their friends throw and they love it, but I absolutely despise it. The amount of people is way too much for me to handle because of all the different sounds and conversations that are going on at the same time, and I can't keep track of it all. And it gets very very loud and I do not like that. Overall, it just makes me feel very overwhelmed and frustrated.
Along with this, even though I do really love spending time with my friends, sometimes even that get's a little too much. When this happens I like to be left alone to just do my own thing. To recuperate. Recently my mom has been coming home early because she had minor surgery where she previously stayed home for a whole two weeks, and now it has been almost three weeks that I have not gotten many moments alone. I feel bad because I love my mom and she just wants to spend time with me, but I really just want to be left alone for now.
Those are some of the biggest symptom like things I have noticed so far but here are a few other things that go on:
- I tend to always find something to be very "obsessed" over. These periods don't last very long though, usually between 1-6 months before I find something new to absorb myself in.
- I am not particular fascinated by numbers but for some reason I am very good at memorizing birthdays.
- I have recently been good at memorizing a lot of thing actually, almost like a photographic memory. Almost, but not really. It's really weird though because this a very recent thing that has been happening. My memory was usually just normal before. I don't know if this is relevant but I added it anyways.
- It is hard for me to pay attention in school. Always has been, hence the ADHD diagnosis. It just never interfered with school before high school because I everything before high school was very easy for me so I didn't need to pay attention.
- I have been having severe migraines with an aura for 3 years now (it started freshman year of high school). I get them anywhere between 1-4 times a month. We still do not yet know my exact triggers, but my doctor believes they may be triggered by an occasional sensitivity to light and/or sound. I read that aspies can sometimes be sensitive to light and/or sound.
- Sometimes I feel 'normal'. Other times I literally feel like an alien compared to every one else. People can just be too confusing sometimes lmao.
I now realize this is a very long post, and I am sorry for that. I tend to rant sometimes. Even though it seems like this all may be symptoms on the surface, the more I think about them the more invalid I feel as though they become, which is why I am confused as to what the heck is going on with me.
Thank You for your help in advance ^^
I have always been an anxious person. It was only when I started high school that I began to get very stressed out to the point where I basically had anxiety (which makes sense because my mom also has very bad anxiety that got worse during her teen years). But apart from school I have always been bad at social situations and communication. I have never made friends that easily which is surprising because sometimes I enjoy other people, especially new people. I find them fascinating and a lot of the times I do this thing where I like to "study" them. Everybody is so different and I like figuring out what makes these people different and unique. I guess, in a way, it has been what helped me get through social situations because I sometimes catch myself mimicking these characteristics that I see others find appealing in people. I have been told by my friends that I sort of "morph" into a slightly different version of them, if that makes sense. At this point, overall I come off as a very normal person. Even so, when I come across social situations with people I do not know I get very frustrated because I cannot keep a conversation going and sometimes I don't even want to. Especially right now because I don't like being in very large groups.
That brings me to another point. My parents often times drag me to these huge parties their friends throw and they love it, but I absolutely despise it. The amount of people is way too much for me to handle because of all the different sounds and conversations that are going on at the same time, and I can't keep track of it all. And it gets very very loud and I do not like that. Overall, it just makes me feel very overwhelmed and frustrated.
Along with this, even though I do really love spending time with my friends, sometimes even that get's a little too much. When this happens I like to be left alone to just do my own thing. To recuperate. Recently my mom has been coming home early because she had minor surgery where she previously stayed home for a whole two weeks, and now it has been almost three weeks that I have not gotten many moments alone. I feel bad because I love my mom and she just wants to spend time with me, but I really just want to be left alone for now.
Those are some of the biggest symptom like things I have noticed so far but here are a few other things that go on:
- I tend to always find something to be very "obsessed" over. These periods don't last very long though, usually between 1-6 months before I find something new to absorb myself in.
- I am not particular fascinated by numbers but for some reason I am very good at memorizing birthdays.
- I have recently been good at memorizing a lot of thing actually, almost like a photographic memory. Almost, but not really. It's really weird though because this a very recent thing that has been happening. My memory was usually just normal before. I don't know if this is relevant but I added it anyways.
- It is hard for me to pay attention in school. Always has been, hence the ADHD diagnosis. It just never interfered with school before high school because I everything before high school was very easy for me so I didn't need to pay attention.
- I have been having severe migraines with an aura for 3 years now (it started freshman year of high school). I get them anywhere between 1-4 times a month. We still do not yet know my exact triggers, but my doctor believes they may be triggered by an occasional sensitivity to light and/or sound. I read that aspies can sometimes be sensitive to light and/or sound.
- Sometimes I feel 'normal'. Other times I literally feel like an alien compared to every one else. People can just be too confusing sometimes lmao.
I now realize this is a very long post, and I am sorry for that. I tend to rant sometimes. Even though it seems like this all may be symptoms on the surface, the more I think about them the more invalid I feel as though they become, which is why I am confused as to what the heck is going on with me.
Thank You for your help in advance ^^
