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AprilR

AprilR

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  • AprilR
    At the social security office a worker just told me "why did you come here? You should have known you could ask for this document on the website" I have come to a different city (2 hours far from my city) to get this document and this is what i am told.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I am tired, thirsty and sleepy. After my work here is done i will return home instead of the office. I don't care anymore. I am too exhausted
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Also the thing that the guy expects me to know, even my employer and other coworkers don't know. So it is not common knowledge.
    AprilR
    I don't like it when i don't respond to a person and they keep messaging me. I understand when people get lonely and want to talk to someone, but you have to respect people's boundaries.
    View previous comments…
    1
    1ofakind
    I understand how uncomfortable you must feel with that. I've had situations similarly that weird me out too. If ignoring doesn't work, you may need to be more direct with him or block his number to help alleviate your stress.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    That would be bad since our families are friends. I also need some friends atm but i don't want to constantly talk to someone with whom i dont have much in common with
    1
    1ofakind
    Oh. That is a difficult situation.
    AprilR
    The guy i am talking to just complained about lgbt people and vegans. I guess i was too optimistic about him
    View previous comments…
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    I was shocked to learned how LGBT and cis people suffer from random violence. It really is disturbing to me.
    All-Rounder
    All-Rounder
    There are two politically extreme sides, I don't like either. Politics can be tricky to talk about sometimes with an open mind without being judged for your own open mind. Hyperpartisans are emotional and tend to run on judgement instead of giving each side a hearing.
    All-Rounder
    All-Rounder
    There's a thin line between bigots and reasonable people, especially if they're on the spectrum, sometimes it's hard to distinguish. It doesn't help that there is violence in the middle and people are afraid to even talk about things. I'm just trying to learn more.
    AprilR
    I will meet with the son of a family friend on Saturday. He kept on texting me after adding me on social media
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I don't really feel any connection with him, but maybe we can still be friends. At this point i really need some reliable friends in my life
    AprilR
    I will try to be honest and open with people from now on. I don't want people who don't know me to put me on a pedestal
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I don't want to put up a front anymore since it made me alone and even with the friends i made there was not much of a connection
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I try to be friendly and mirror other people, but they don't with me since they are "socially acceptable"
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I am not an overly kind person, i am actually selfish and prickly.ı want the people in my life to see the real me
    AprilR
    I want people to stop set me up with someone. I get so scared that they will understand i am disabled since they always ask about my previous relationships
    AprilR
    AprilR
    It happened before, i tried to change the subject but they kept asking.
    1
    1ofakind
    It is a red flag for me when people don't respect my boundaries (Like continuing to ask when you are avoiding the subject). People who care about you will respect your boundaries and it is okay to tell them you are uncomfortable with their requests or inquiry and expect them to respect that.
    AprilR
    Lol i think my father's friend is trying to play matchmaker for his son and me
    View previous comments…
    AprilR
    AprilR
    More like anxiety and awkwardness lol
    Forest Cat
    Forest Cat
    "Anxiety and awkwardness is in the air"... it doesn't sound as catchy, not a good song title. I'm sorry it's difficult for you.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Thanks. It is very anxiety inducing bc before people have asked me how many relationships i had/why i dont have a boyfriend or am not married at my age. I don't want people to understand i am not normal
    AprilR
    My weekend is ruined, i was soaked in the rain and had to still go to work since i had too much work to do but my head hurt so much i had to leave early
    AprilR
    Omg i am so glad my coworker left. She is so arrogant.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    People can't even speak on the group chat without miss know it all putting everyone down. Good riddance
    AprilR
    I have a therapist appointment in 2 days and don't even want to see her. There is only so much my therapist can do, she cannot control my circumstances and she is probably feeling depressed too. I don't want to burden her further
    tree
    tree
    You're right.
    Therapist can't control your circumstances.
    That's not her job.

    Her work is to help you learn how to deal with your thoughts and feelings
    about your circumstances.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Remember that therapists are trained to manage their own feelings and they have resources for this. It is not your job to keep your therapist happy or keep them from having difficulties. It is an unbalanced relationship in this way. She is there for you. Your feelings are the ones that matter in therapy.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Thank you both. I will not cancel it after all
    AprilR
    I am scared for my future. Right now i hate the fact that i was born in this country
    View previous comments…
    Trophonius
    Trophonius
    What happened? Is there any way we can help you?
    I also feel that way often. It's feel like playing life in hard-mode, as if it wasn't hard enough for us by itself.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I would like to be western european.

    Thank you, there is nothing anyone can do sadly. I am stuck here, and can't imagine to move to another country as i am too old and socially inept to ever survive in a foreign country without any help.
    Trophonius
    Trophonius
    You're not too old at all! I am sure you will be able to make it if that's what you want. Depending on our circumstances it may take from days to years to be able to do so, but we'll get there. But I agree about the last part, it'd be hard to be to move to a different country unless I already know I have a job there, otherwise I'd to too socially inept to get one
    AprilR
    I celebrated my friend for Mother's day. She answers with "i hope you get to experience it too" I am sorry but no.
    AprilR
    One of the things i dislike most about my condition is my social difficulties. If they did not exist i would have immigrated to a different country long ago
    Atrapa Almas
    Atrapa Almas
    As I moved from Spain to Mexico I found out that many mexican people tend to excuse my social mistakes as "thats how spanish people must normaly behave". So to me its being at advantage to camouflage.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Idk, if i was younger maybe i would consider it. But i spent too much time and effort on my degree and my job.( I can't do my job in a different country)
    AprilR
    I am trying not to hope too much.. Bc i know i will prob. Be disappointed. But still..
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I want to believe in the future and that there is hope for me and ppl like me.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    We can always hope for hope! Hope is a powerful thing that cannot be scared away if we choose to protect it.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I am scared to be disappointed. (There are elections tomorrow)
    AprilR
    Tomorrow is my coworker's Last day at work. I dont really like her much but she was my senior and was very hardworking.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    She is getting married and moving to another city. I wish her well regardless
    AprilR
    I am expected to organize an office right now.
    Lowkey want to get fired since i am too exhausted
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I do not want to make a mistake and cause problems for my employer. I am so anxious
    AprilR
    Listening to 12 hour long playlists for calming cats. I wish all animals in the world happy and peaceful lives.
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