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AprilR

AprilR

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  • AprilR
    I feel like how i did when i was 17 again. Some media make me feel like that.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I feel like i am back to myself again
    1
    1ofakind
    Is feeling like you are 17 again a good thing for you? Was it three minutes of bliss? (I thought it was a good thing but don't want to make any assumptions)
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Yes it was a good thing. I used to feel alive at that age
    AprilR
    Some guy got really offended when i stopped masking and bluntly said what i mean. Good riddance
    View previous comments…
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Yeah for some people the slightest disagreement is viewed as a personal offense
    A
    AspieChris
    Wouldn’t it be nice if we could be ourselves and the NT’s all were forced to pretend to be like us? I’ll never understand why I’m expected to say what they want to hear, but they can just say whatever crap is on their mind and I’m just supposed to take it.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Yes, when they do it they do it in a more sly way and protect themselves.
    AprilR
    Exhausted yet again and no one cares
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Sorry to read this AprilR. Is it work?
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    I care. Perpetual exhaustion is so difficult.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Thank you guys. My therapist said i am heading towards burnout
    @Aspychata : yes it is. I don't have much of a life aside from work also since i am too tired to spend time even with my family and my only friend.
    AprilR
    Dad criticizes my handwriting and said i could do better. Um actually no, my handwriting is bad no matter how much effort i put into it.
    View previous comments…
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    You are definitely valuable to the world. Absolutely and very much so.
    Kisa the tea
    Kisa the tea
    I'm very much not happy with my handwriting and think it's bad and that's one thing but other people insulting your handwriting just because is so rude.
    Stuttermabolur
    Stuttermabolur
    I have terrible handwriting and write much more down by hand than most everyone I know. At uni, I was the only one who took notes by hand instead of using a laptop. It still hasn't improved even a little since I was 11. Some things you just can't do well.
    AprilR
    Had a bad day. There was an online meeting and my brain stopped working. I could not talk much i was so anxious. I was trembling all over
    AprilR
    I felt like messaging my new friend, but then i got reminded his angry rant for lgbt people and vegans. I don't need such a person in my life
    L
    Luca
    I certainly don't allow people in my life who angrily rant about LGBT people, this is why I no longer talk to my extended family.
    My advice for people is always that if someone is doing you more harm than good, it's best to not have them around.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Yes i was just getting to know him and he started his rant. He also ranted about asexuals, like why do you care? I wish he wasn't a family friend so i could ignore him but he keeps messaging me. He sends audio clips to boot which is also annoying
    AprilR
    I don't feel anything anymore aside from occasional annoyance. Just numb
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Trying to make myself cry since sadness feels more real than happiness
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Is work upsetting?
    AprilR
    AprilR
    It is more than that. Constant masking is draining me and life goes too fast without me being able to process what i am feeling
    AprilR
    I am so tired. I really wish there was more help for autistic people here. Like part time work, more time for ourselves, direct and detailed explanations
    AprilR
    At the social security office a worker just told me "why did you come here? You should have known you could ask for this document on the website" I have come to a different city (2 hours far from my city) to get this document and this is what i am told.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I am tired, thirsty and sleepy. After my work here is done i will return home instead of the office. I don't care anymore. I am too exhausted
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Also the thing that the guy expects me to know, even my employer and other coworkers don't know. So it is not common knowledge.
    AprilR
    I don't like it when i don't respond to a person and they keep messaging me. I understand when people get lonely and want to talk to someone, but you have to respect people's boundaries.
    View previous comments…
    1
    1ofakind
    I understand how uncomfortable you must feel with that. I've had situations similarly that weird me out too. If ignoring doesn't work, you may need to be more direct with him or block his number to help alleviate your stress.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    That would be bad since our families are friends. I also need some friends atm but i don't want to constantly talk to someone with whom i dont have much in common with
    1
    1ofakind
    Oh. That is a difficult situation.
    AprilR
    The guy i am talking to just complained about lgbt people and vegans. I guess i was too optimistic about him
    View previous comments…
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    I was shocked to learned how LGBT and cis people suffer from random violence. It really is disturbing to me.
    All-Rounder
    All-Rounder
    There are two politically extreme sides, I don't like either. Politics can be tricky to talk about sometimes with an open mind without being judged for your own open mind. Hyperpartisans are emotional and tend to run on judgement instead of giving each side a hearing.
    All-Rounder
    All-Rounder
    There's a thin line between bigots and reasonable people, especially if they're on the spectrum, sometimes it's hard to distinguish. It doesn't help that there is violence in the middle and people are afraid to even talk about things. I'm just trying to learn more.
    AprilR
    I will meet with the son of a family friend on Saturday. He kept on texting me after adding me on social media
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I don't really feel any connection with him, but maybe we can still be friends. At this point i really need some reliable friends in my life
    AprilR
    I will try to be honest and open with people from now on. I don't want people who don't know me to put me on a pedestal
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I don't want to put up a front anymore since it made me alone and even with the friends i made there was not much of a connection
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I try to be friendly and mirror other people, but they don't with me since they are "socially acceptable"
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I am not an overly kind person, i am actually selfish and prickly.ı want the people in my life to see the real me
    AprilR
    I want people to stop set me up with someone. I get so scared that they will understand i am disabled since they always ask about my previous relationships
    AprilR
    AprilR
    It happened before, i tried to change the subject but they kept asking.
    1
    1ofakind
    It is a red flag for me when people don't respect my boundaries (Like continuing to ask when you are avoiding the subject). People who care about you will respect your boundaries and it is okay to tell them you are uncomfortable with their requests or inquiry and expect them to respect that.
    AprilR
    Lol i think my father's friend is trying to play matchmaker for his son and me
    View previous comments…
    AprilR
    AprilR
    More like anxiety and awkwardness lol
    Forest Cat
    Forest Cat
    "Anxiety and awkwardness is in the air"... it doesn't sound as catchy, not a good song title. I'm sorry it's difficult for you.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Thanks. It is very anxiety inducing bc before people have asked me how many relationships i had/why i dont have a boyfriend or am not married at my age. I don't want people to understand i am not normal
    AprilR
    My weekend is ruined, i was soaked in the rain and had to still go to work since i had too much work to do but my head hurt so much i had to leave early
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