Hi, i actually just want to rant. This stuff has been in my head for months. I tried to google if there's anybody else has ranted about the same problem, but i couldnt find it, only can find 'informational' stuff about this.
Okay. I've been assigned as a committee member for a conference event. Previously, I've been assigned to other event committees as well, and i was not experienced at that time. At that time, everybody else in the committee were very great people, they know what they need to do, they put lots of efforts in making everything good & smooth. I even got a bit depressed because I couldnt catch up with them, and feel like I'm doing a lousy job compared to them (because I had no prior experience, and I'm not that good in doing this kind of thing.
The current event committee that I'm in. Sooo disappointing!
First of all, the leader is kinda absent in her mind. Clearly he doesnt prioritize this event, because he has another big important personal event he need to handle at the same time. He should have refused this assignment in the beginning by saying that she need to cater to another big event! Surely the higher-ups will be considerate.. I feel this event is not smooth because he doesnt care about details, just leave to committee members to decide everything by ourselves, doesnt even explain what our direction and our job scopes are. I think he doesnt even know. Recently he told me he needs somebody to guide him first then he can do it (this is about something else). If so.. why didnt he seek guidance since the beginning.. but I know everybody is busy with other main jobs..
Dont get me wrong, I like him in other situations. He's good at what he is passionate at - he even lead a hobby group and do other things greatly.
I'm just disappointed that some people doesnt actually even care much about the event. Not only the leader, but some other members as well. They just wait for other people to tell them what to do. They even told me that I need to set my priority straight - even though we put lots of effort managing this event, it wont be counted in our Performance Index. Yeah, because this is just a voluntary jobs pushed by the higher ups to us, when this is not what we need to do, it's even hindering our main job - less time for our main job, but less appreciation for the effort.
This team is consists of some of the members (including the leader!) like this. So, no wonder it's lousy. I think this committee is very lousy. But they themselves don't think so. The slack member praised our leader because he's not so strict; they call it empowerment. Wtf.. you call a leader who doesnt even know what's going on, or even if he knows, doesnt lead us & let us do all the work, a great leader? Oh yeah.. because he doesnt lead, i got to lead myself because i cant trust him & the committee much.. That's a good training for me too to become more independent.
Because they dont even care for the details. Dont they think from the conference participants' POV?
Haa.. i know they are right too. Maybe i'm too uptight. I'm just really disappointed that they dont seem to care. Only some members did their job with care. Others, not much. Empty participation. I'm frustrated that when we do the work & ask related members to check, they dont even check! Lastly, I'm the one who check some and notice the mistake..
They really dont even care, especially about the details. If so, I just wish we could scrap this event earlier. Not much participants too. Leader doesnt even care about the details, and doesnt lead too - seems absent-minded. The member who has the most important job also doesnt even care much. What about other details? Leader doesnt even assigned the local tasks - who's in charge in transportation blah blah blah. I dont care anymore. I wont do it anymore. Let them handle by themselves.
Poor participants and poor the other event committee that are organizing parallel event together with us. That other committee handles most of the local arrangements, so our tasks are much more easier. I know, but I also has dealt as a local committee member dealing with other committee who dumps things on us. We needed their decision fast, we've contacted them many times, but they dont even care to reply because they were handling another big event! See the similarities between that f*cking wont-reply committee with my current f*king committee??
Maybe I'm too uptight. Empty participation, no response (even if there's any, that's just empty response) when i ask to check.. i feel not appreciated and tired of worrying the details of other things that other people should do.. i feel a bit resentful when the leader is not even worrying - doesnt even care about the details, which other members also dont even notice or care...
Can we just please cancel the event? Can i escape this committee??
Or maybe I should be more grateful. Because here I dont feel low self-esteem compared when being in a highly-performing great committee. And I should be grateful that many people take it easy - i should take it easy too and relax.
I feel stupid for taking the tasks seriously, when the slack members will eventually do them well with less effort. Maybe I'm not that normal, that's why simple things also seems bigger to me, and I need lots of effort & attention to details compared to normal people. Maybe that's the thing. I'm jealous of how easy doing the tasks are for most people...
Edit: Please don't get me wrong, I really like these people, they are great people! They always helped me and my husband too. Maybe i was just frustrated at how they seem not focusing on the missing details, and maybe i'm just tired or too controlling and always makes thing more difficult to others and need to be more relaxed.
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Uncommitted Event Committee Members...