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Ponderings with Pap

Papillon
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All through school you would watch people grow up and leave school onto the next school or graduating school all together, the people that you looked up to. But as you get older you start to notice your friends growing up, wearing “cooler” clothes, talking about relationships and all the latest...
Papillon
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As the whole world starts to disappear from around me and becomes less than reality at the same time as the things around me become seemingly more important and they start feeling as if I’m being watched as if I need to escape as if I need to hide as if the only true escape is to die. The...
Papillon
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As I stare out the window fixated on what is beyond what I can see wishing that I could become a part of the beyond and disappear so that no one will be able to see me again I realise how looking out the window is like a metaphor for how I feel but also a great physical representation of what I...
Papillon
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Outside there fireworks go off, it is now the 4th hour of this going on and with the anxiety about going to bed increasing its getting too much. My body starts to feel uncomfortable, my stomach does flip flops as I think about the thing that's sitting on my bedside table, the light of my phone...
Papillon
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It feels like the whole world is a world that is separate from yours like all the people and things occurring are separate from your world as if you are the reader of the book who is walking around this universe watching everything happen but unable to participate, seeing what’s about to happen...
Papillon
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While I want this to be a positive letter it can’t be at least completely. Dear Autism, Firstly I wanted to say thank you, I want to say thank you for the way in which I see the world if it weren’t for you being a part of me I wouldn’t take photos in the way that I do and take photos of the...

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Papillon
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