It feels like the whole world is a world that is separate from yours like all the people and things occurring are separate from your world as if you are the reader of the book who is walking around this universe watching everything happen but unable to participate, seeing what’s about to happen but unable to stop it. No one sees you or acknowledges that you’re there, someone walks into you, but you keep going because you have to keep going otherwise its all going to stop all of a sudden and the two universes will collide. The tears start pooling in your eyes and then they trickle down your face, but no one notices, no one asks if you’re okay, no one cares so you wipe them away and pretend like you’re fine just in case you stop being invisible and someone notices. Your head starts spinning and you walk faster and faster, you close your eyes and pretend like you’re in a different world one where it matters that you are there one where people care and ask you if you’re okay and help you when you’re not. You walk across the road; your eyes are still closed.
The universes collide and you are back in the real one where people notice that you’re there, but people still don’t care. You keep walking, back into your own universe where you are safe but unseen “you shouldn’t cross the road with your eyes closed, you shouldn’t cross the road with your eyes closed, you shouldn’t cross the road with your eyes closed” repeats in your head getting faster and faster matching the pace you are walking.
You open your eyes and burst into tears.
You fumble with the key in the door struggling to get it open unable to see through the tears. The door finally unlocks, and you walk in the door, close it behind you and collapse in a heap on the floor, the cat comes and brushes against you asking if you are okay, finally someone that cares.
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