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Discussion in 'Love, Relationships and Dating' started by Brit, Oct 13, 2020.

  1. WildCat

    WildCat V.I.P Member

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  2. Tom

    Tom Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    It's just my opinion, but in a NT/ASD relationship I believe being willing to compromise or alternate concessions is essential. I don't see how it could be a fair and satisfactory arrangement otherwise.
     
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  3. Fino

    Fino Alex V.I.P Member

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    Sounds like you both want different things. The route of least pain would be to end it. I spent years in a relationship with someone who wanted different things and it was torture.
     
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  4. Au Naturel

    Au Naturel Au Naturel

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    Walk away. If he follows, decide whether you're willing to go back to him. If he doesn't, you need to understand that you can't fix all the injured animals in the forest.
     
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  5. Autistic Yoda

    Autistic Yoda Do. Or do not. There is no 'try'. V.I.P Member

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    IMHO, we are not fit to determine whether a couple should break up or stay together based on a just little bit of text provided by one side. More information would be needed, such as closely observing your dialogue and body language when you're together.
     
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  6. SusanLR

    SusanLR Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    All I can tell you is how I would have felt in his shoes.

    I could never fulfill what people call a normal couple or truly being together.
    There was a love emotion for a couple of guys, but, it just was not strong enough
    to make me want to be with them 24/7, marry or live with them, and I never wanted children.
    Also, in my case, making a romantic asexual relationship work just doesn't.

    Living together I would feel confined, controlled, never at ease.

    As far as the Happy Birthday request, again, I would feel I was being told what to do and
    loss of control.
    I might say it, if it weren't requested. Just let it come naturally.

    Aspychata said it correctly...we are unconventional.
     
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  7. Brit

    Brit Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    It is :(

    I realise now that im still asking the very same questions I was asking back then.

    Thank you for all the responses. Its really interesting to hear your thoughts. And I have to admit that each and every 2 cents input Ive received makes complete sense.

    I am constantly asking for more, even when I consider them to be small things.
     
  8. Gerontius

    Gerontius Active Member

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    Happy late birthday Ms Brit!

    Autistic guy here: AUTISM IS NO EXCUSE TO TREAT A LOVED ONE POORLY.

    Let me reiterate that. There is no excuse whatsoever to engage in an immoral and emotionally abusive lifestyle such as he attempts to impose.
     
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  9. Brit

    Brit Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Thank you Gerontius. I dont believe he is being immoral or emotionally abusive, but I guess that is open to interpretation.

    I haven't heard from him since Tuesday when I left his apartment, not a single message, feeling so sad and desperate. The silent treatment is just the worst for me.
     
  10. Brit

    Brit Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Still no contact, im so upset.
     
  11. Stardust Parade

    Stardust Parade Well-Known Member

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    Dump him and move on. He doesn’t love you.
     
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  12. ShamarZ15

    ShamarZ15 Chaotic Neutral

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    Don't dwell on it and for your happiness for the time being, I'd keep it moving and keep your mind focused on other interests to see if he reaches out in the near future.
     
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