What your psychiatrist says to you, you already know, due to having been your own therapist.

[Suzanne]

I had been in therapy on and off in my 20's and early 30's and one therapist even said to me, that I do not need one, as I well able to be my own therapist and I came to the conclusion that really, the best therapist was myself, because I tend to be brutely honest with me.

Well, having moved to a different country and coming face to face with more challenges and the reality is that I need an official diagnosis of SOMETHING, it prompted me to seek out a psychiatrist for the first time ever and the first visit did not really go that bad, accept that he has made a conjecture and I have to now sort that out.

The problem I am faced with, is that every thing he says, I already know and not sure I can sit there and make out that I am ignorant.

The only thing "going" for me, is that he does not speak English and thus, my husband has to do most of the talking, so for once, I realised that I had to sort of "tutor" my willing husband on what to say and I give that man credit, he is being very accommodating.

My husband is now saying that he wants to bring up the possibility of aspergers and it was rather amusing, because when he was explaining my actions, it all shouted out: aspergers, but unfortunately, the therapist latched on to peodophila and basically, swept all other notions aside and stated: you have ptsd from the abuse. Actually, I do not. I have it from the effects of what I told the authorites and how I was treated.

He offered me either therapy or medication. I don't need medicating and I do not need therapy either. I NEED to be officially diagnosed, but it seems he is EAGER to speak to me, which is rather frustrating.

I had hoped that the language barrier would have him deal with me quickly lol

I go back this friday to see him and am so worried that it is all going to go horribly wrong.

 

[Catana]

Yes, it will almost certainly go horribly wrong. Cancel. Change psychiatrists -- immediately. Your very first session with him and he's already diagnosed you? And suggested that you might need medication? Add in the language barrier, and you have a situation that isn't going to improve.

 

[LucyPurrs]

Tell him what would be most helpful to you right now is an accurate diagnosis and that you feel he is not hearing all he needs to hear for that to be accurate. Write down all the symptoms you have that are consistent with Asperger's and bring him the results of the Raads-R and any other on line tests you've taken. Maybe your husband can translate all this for you.
Well, Catana might have a good point but as I recall, you don't have any other psychiatrists in your area where you live. So be assertive about your needs as much as you can.

 

[Judge]

I go back this friday to see him and am so worried that it is all going to go horribly wrong.

If this is in France isn't this a foregone conclusion? A nation whose formal medical establishment categorically does not recognize Aspergers Syndrome.

Pills and therapy. Ultimately neither did anything to really address my being on the spectrum either. Though at a time in the US when they didn't recognize Aspergers Syndrome as well.

Seems to me Belgium...there lies your best hope IMO. A literal refuge for French Aspies. Think of all the people here who KNOW what their issues really are, and go on to validate them with a formal diagnosis. But that's something you cannot achieve in France. Where there's no "second place" finish for an alternative diagnosis that doesn't deal with Aspergers Syndrome in whole or in part.

 

[Suzanne]

Yes, it will almost certainly go horribly wrong. Cancel. Change psychiatrists -- immediately. Your very first session with him and he's already diagnosed you? And suggested that you might need medication? Add in the language barrier, and you have a situation that isn't going to improve.

My husband said it was only a primarly diagnostic, because of how distressed I was.

Can't just swap to another psychiatrist, because this one was a miracle to get anyway and besides, it is free.

 

[Suzanne]

Tell him what would be most helpful to you right now is an accurate diagnosis and that you feel he is not hearing all he needs to hear for that to be accurate. Write down all the symptoms you have that are consistent with Asperger's and bring him the results of the Raads-R and any other on line tests you've taken. Maybe your husband can translate all this for you.
Well, Catana might have a good point but as I recall, you don't have any other psychiatrists in your area where you live. So be assertive about your needs as much as you can.

My husband says I should be straight up with him and so that is what I am going to try and do.

 

[Suzanne]

If this is in France isn't this a foregone conclusion? A nation whose formal medical establishment categorically does not recognize Aspergers Syndrome.

Pills and therapy. Ultimately neither did anything to really address my being on the spectrum either. Though at a time in the US when they didn't recognize Aspergers Syndrome as well.

Seems to me Belgium...there lies your best hope IMO. A literal refuge for French Aspies. Think of all the people here who KNOW what their issues really are, and go on to validate them with a formal diagnosis. But that's something you cannot achieve in France. Where there's no "second place" finish for an alternative diagnosis that doesn't deal with Aspergers Syndrome in whole or in part.

I said this to hubby and what he said was: well, say you believe you are on the autism spectrum and just go from there.

 

[Judge]

I said this to hubby and what he said was: well, say you believe you are on the autism spectrum and just go from there.

So you need to go to Belgium, where there's hope of a proper diagnosis. Certainly not France whose medical establishment does not even recognize Aspergers Syndrome. Also consider a higher possibility of finding a doctor there who speaks English rather well.

This is a situation IMO where you need to placate yourself first and foremost- not your husband.

Carpe Diem.

 

[Suzanne]

So you need to go to Belgium, where there's hope of a proper diagnosis. Certainly not France whose medical establishment does not even recognize Aspergers Syndrome. Also consider a higher possibility of finding a doctor there who speaks English rather well.

This is a situation IMO where you need to placate yourself first and foremost- not your husband.

Carpe Diem.

Sadly, just not going to happen.

 

[Judge]

Sadly, just not going to happen.

Understood. It's just that people are certainly supportive here, but such support is primarily based on common denominators relative to autism. Not a school of thought that summarily rejects Aspergers Syndrome in whole and in part.

Under such circumstances, do you consider further exposure to us counter-productive to what your therapist is willing to offer? Just wondering. It sounds incredibly frustrating. Or as we say in the states, to be "between a rock and a hard place".

 

[2205]

I have been in this situation too, where I feel I know way more than my therapist. But I always doubt if I really know more or maybe I just don't understand what she knows... some kind of autism paradox or something.. But once my therapist even told me that "obviously you've read more than me about this subject" and my psychiatrist (who I see due to other mental issues) often just ignores lots of stuff related to asd, which makes me guess she doesn't know about it much.
For example, she's blaming my eating disorder for most of the symptoms, but I feel that at least half of them are just my possible asd (I'm not diagnosed) and have nothing to do with eating disorder. And one thing I also don't understand is why doesn't my psychiatrist diagnose me with asd, although I made this ados-2 test which was positive and I have diagnosis of "Depression with signs of pervasive developmental disorder" or something like that...

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

you have ptsd from the abuse. Actually, I do not. I have it from the effects of what I told the authorites and how I was treated

1 you have PTSD
2. You can get therapy for it (not drugs)
3. You know France doesn't recognise Asperger's.

Even if you have PTSD for a different reason going for option 2 is the best option imo.

You have the foot in the door,you are being offered the option.
Regarding the reason for it - often these things can be mixed together.

Where will pushing for an asd diagnosis lead when it's not recognised?

 

[Suzanne]

Tell him what would be most helpful to you right now is an accurate diagnosis and that you feel he is not hearing all he needs to hear for that to be accurate. Write down all the symptoms you have that are consistent with Asperger's and bring him the results of the Raads-R and any other on line tests you've taken. Maybe your husband can translate all this for you.
Well, Catana might have a good point but as I recall, you don't have any other psychiatrists in your area where you live. So be assertive about your needs as much as you can.

I honestly failed to read your response correctly, LucyPurrs and all I can say is THANK YOU for your immense help.

So, I can actually tell him what would be most helpful? I thought that would be regarded as insufferably arrogant? As most aspie experience with psychiatrists, but to give the one I am seeing credit, he does seem actually interested, so will give it a go.

So appreciate your words of wisdom, Lucy and I will give it my best try. I shall be taking my natural anti anxiety tablets this time, because I can already feel anxiety rearing its head, as tomorrow looms.

 

[Suzanne]

Where will pushing for an asd diagnosis lead when it's not recognised?

That is what I said to my husband, when he said: in truth, I feel that we must concentrate on getting you diagnosed with aspergers and I said: yes, but France does not recognise it and his response was: in that case, we will say we think you are on the the spectrum of autism and go from there.

 

[Chance]

I go back this friday to see him and am so worried that it is all going to go horribly wrong.

NO, no, no... Wrong thinking... and you will put off the energy that is how you FEEL!!!!

You are going tomorrow to better yourself, and find out truths about yourself.
You be YOU... and don't even try to play their silly psych games... BE YOU! If you break down and cry then do that. If you get upset then do that. If you dont understand then MAKE him explain himself until you do.
This is for YOU not him, not your husband... YOU... and your peace of mind.

The mind games are what got me into a place where I was noticing exactly what was going on.
I actually got upset in a session and told my therapist that I didn't like his brand of BS.
He figured out that I had already figured him out, and it messed his little agenda up.
I don't fit in their "box" because I don't intend on there ever being a stupid box in the first place.

I use to catch myself "masking" and trying to give the answers expected and that was just dragging things way out, just be the RAW you... That's what they are searching for anyway...

My bet is you will do great... and I wish you all the confidence you need... : )

 

[Chance]

Can't just swap to another psychiatrist, because this one was a miracle to get anyway and besides, it is free.

WOW... I never heard of "free" Psychology... That's not going to happen here that I know of...
Here it costs me about 265.00-300.00 US dollars an hour... Far from free, but its focused and very situation oriented. I have spent over 5000.00 on therapy... Did it "fix" me... Obviously NO! But it did answer lots of questions... and did give me tools to grasp some things I was deeply struggling with... But fix me, thats basically gonna take a lobotomy, and I'm sort of happy being my weird messed up self versus a human void...

What they don't understand is I got my "PHD" in house LOL... I paid my tuition by studying myself and them...ODDLY that's sort of the mindset I have always had about it, and I think it's helped me a lot to do that.

Also "free" might not be such a good deal... They have NO REASON to even try and meet your needs.
However it could also work out great, but free is usually not very high grade anything.

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

have spent over 5000.00 on therapy... Did it "fix" me... Obviously NO!

My fix was for $3500.
Guaranteed.

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

Also "free" might not be such a good deal... They have NO REASON to even try and meet your needs.
However it could also work out great, but free is usually not very high grade anything

Conversely... paid for means their motive is to get repeat business.
Not,necessarily to cure you.
Paid for means their honesty is always challenged..
Kids gotta eat, gotta get a new.......(inserted expensive non needed thing here)

The american system is very good at inventing a 'need' to either take a pill or get help for a 'problem'

 

[Bella Pines]

Keep at it, we're all behind you lending energy

So what's the end goal here? To get an official diagnosis down on paper for practical reasons? To get an official diagnosis for completion and personal reasons? Or to further understand yourself? Or to help with something in your life?

 

[Chance]

Conversely... paid for means their motive is to get repeat business.
Not,necessarily to cure you.
Paid for means their honesty is always challenged..
Kids gotta eat, gotta get a new.......(inserted expensive non needed thing here)

The american system is very good at inventing a 'need' to either take a pill or get help for a 'problem'

Agree 100%, but also when you pay, you have a say.
In today's instant digital economy one of the greatest tools people have developed is Ratings and Reviews...

I like this because it lets people sort of know who is a dirt bag and who truly cares about their patients or customers... Sure its not 100% accurate but if your viewing someone with 505 good reviews and only a couple negative reviews... Well, that says a lot to me.

In the land of "free", (at least here) the best expectation is to not expect much of anything, other than a scam, or a way to route you into something that's fixing to cost you more than you can imagine.

The "American way" is often very, very shady. I sort of got into this yesterday at the eye doctor...
What they stated up front, and what it winds up costing was about 300.00 more.
Now since I want contacts... They need to retest me for a different type prescription...
I told the lady I wanted contacts UP FRONT! But they didnt care to listen and I told them and all they say is that wasnt what was written down.
So I get to do this all again. Its just a scam everywhere
It's just everywhere. : )