The question is how do you deal with your disruptive child at school?
Parents, please understand, that society does not understand your child’s sometimes violent, aggressive, loud, screaming meltdown behaviors. Even though you might have given a de-escalation plan to the principle, or his teacher, that does not mean that all staff, or security/police, or bus drivers/attendants, or anyone else has the coping skills, knowledge, or experience to deal with meltdown extreme behaviors. The expectation that society should know what to do, or how to behave during a child’s extreme behavior is unrealistic. Sad and disturbing, of course.
The chain of people your child deals with daily just do not have the education, patience, nor skillsets that you the parents of autistic children do. It’s easy to say how bad and abusive the people in these kinds of stories/videos are. Of course it’s heart breaking. But I listen to staff people that deal with autistic children, tell their stories all the time. School and bus attendants. Bus drivers. Teachers. How they get punched, kicked, bitten- and observe that happening to the other children - by the meltdown child too! I myself have been bitten badly by a 12 year old autistic female.
Staff dealing with groups of children are on high alert all day long for the entire group of children. That’s the nature of all jobs involving cpkids. Your child might need a single person that is with him solely. A staff person who can watch for the first signs of discomfort before the meltdown. A staff person who knows your child and is not distracted by having to deal with 14 or more other kids too.
No staff should expect to go to work and get screamed at, punched in the face, slapped, kicked, or have objects hurled at them. You might have years being used to it. You have had a long time to learn coping skills. If you have any ideas how to teach every single person he has to deal with daily (teachers, classmates, school bus drivers/attendants, cafeteria staff, etc about your child’s needs, please share.
