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I got banned from a group for using functioning labels

Discussion in 'General Autism Discussion' started by Ephraim Becker, Feb 13, 2021.

  1. Neonatal RRT

    Neonatal RRT Well-Known Member

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    Exactly what I was talking about. These ultra sensitive social justice warrior types,...:rolleyes:. If anything, she, herself, came off as some sort of elitist.

    At some level, I do understand some of the sensitivity around the term "high-functioning",...I get it,...but it should be a term that autistics can use amongst ourselves,...as we have an understanding of what that really means. The only time that I have gotten a bit irritated by the term "high-functioning" is when it is used by neurotypicals who tend to ignorantly disregard the daily struggles of an autistic who is "high-functioning".

    Sorry about the ban,...but you're probably better off without that kind of toxicity in your life.
     
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  2. SDRSpark

    SDRSpark Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    All of this. When I see her response (especially the last one) I think words I cannot say here.

    Suffice to say, I would not knowingly associate with someone like her unless I were forced to. I especially wouldn't do so in my free time.
     
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  3. WildCat

    WildCat V.I.P Member

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    Yuck. Looks like a lot of us were right then. I can tell you you definitely do NOT want to be around people like that.

    Just quoting this here because I do understand though not fully, and I can see where other people are coming from when it gets explained in detail why it's not always a good idea. I know what it can be like and was like as well...

    HOWEVER, in groups like the one covered in this thread...if it's what I think it is or what it can lead to, almost borderline "thought policing" where any sort of deviation from what the group expects gets met with the kind of hostility shown in that screenshot, you do NOT want to be a part of that for very long. That isn't a path to making new friends at all, that leads to more trouble.
     
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  4. Gerontius

    Gerontius Well-Known Member

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    "High functioning autistic" is literally what the doctor diagnosed me as. While I see how some people may perchance find that offensive, it is a technical term and should as such be recognized.
     
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  5. paloftoon

    paloftoon Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    I'm sorry about your experience Ephraim. I think many people in that particular group are having a hard time adjusting to your social nuances and get offended by them. So, the result was what happened. I'm sorry that things didn't socially work out between you and others. That must hurt to be dejected like that.

    I don't know you well Ephraim, but considering your math thread and seeing this one, I get the "sixth sense" that maybe there were some more inappropriate things you said that were much harsher than this label/"race" thing and that this "slight" was their last straw. I agree with others that you don't want to be around this group. In the same "token", try to learn as much as you can from those experiences to make you a better person for others. Also, any feedback you receive just your math response comments and this forum's replies to it are things to consider.

    In this forum, you know we'll try to support you even if we may be right, wrong, or in-between. But you know we care and that there's some heart from many of us. Good luck, and definitely take into heavy consideration some of the responses people offer to you from your threads.
     
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  6. Wolfgangus Faldestolius

    Wolfgangus Faldestolius Little notes from an armchair

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    This reminds me of the thread here where one of us said "we" are nerds or geeks (rather than just a voluntary sub tribe) but the atmosphere was wholly relaxed around that discussion. It matters far less how someone expresses themselves in the first place than how people adultly and kindly decide to take it to.
     
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  7. N2k12

    N2k12 Active Member

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    The way you said that. Bang on. 100% truth. You running for president next term? Hehe
     
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  8. Wolfgangus Faldestolius

    Wolfgangus Faldestolius Little notes from an armchair

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    Ephraim, "functioning" is what we do when we are by ourselves a lot more than with others.
    You could do what I did.
    The Vulcan bomber is my analogy. It was "supposed to be" a high altitude nuclear missile delivery thingy.
    Then it got re-purposed for low level operations (and had to be strengthened for it).
    Then it didn't get much use.
    We need to be cool about being us, on our own, in our own time, on base.
    And "functioning below the radar". And not in others' faces.
    When you are cool about you, you will be cool about others, and they will be cool about you.
    It's taken me a long time. I found my solo hobbies. I stopped being ashamed of my potential. I might dare to write history or science essays in my old age. I wrote three very short stories (they just came out of me). I get a kick out of organising my home.
    When you are in others' faces, don't try too hard.
    With the doctor, discuss a low dose (they can get too all-or-nothing, out of ignorance but not malice). The purpose not being to dope you but to get your multitasking going better.
    Drink a big glass of water on getting up.
     
  9. Alexej

    Alexej Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Leave the group and find something else.
    You are wasting your time to fight this one - it will only lead to grief and frustration (for you).
     
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  10. Bibliophile715

    Bibliophile715 Armin - system member - any pronouns

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    I don't trust Facebook and I'll never have an account on there. I tend to stay away from most mainstream social media sites because I've learned to. I've been blocked by others for having disagreements with them before on sites other than Facebook. Don't be discouraged by this. I hope you have better online experiences in the future.
     
  11. Ephraim Becker

    Ephraim Becker Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    It was my first post and all I posted was my criteria for friends.
     
  12. Alexej

    Alexej Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    I am so sad that this is the reaction to your first post, it is a bit hard IMHO.


    I am reminded of a quote by a guy Joshua, a Jew who moved around the Holy Land some 2000 years ago about shaking the dust off your feet and moving on. In this case this sounds like relevant advice.
     
  13. Au Naturel

    Au Naturel Au Naturel

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    Welcome to a brave new world where everyone is so insecure they look for insults, regardless of whether an insult was intended.

    High functioning = ASD 1 = Asperger's. More or less. Obviously, there needs to be some way to differentiate between how well one is able to function in society, if for no other reason than to provide the level of assistance needed. Arguing about labels is a way to feel edgy and superior to those rotten old people who are the cause of all the ills of humanity. Talk about a self insulated bubble!

    A thing is what it is independent of its label. The traits of the thing to which it is applied to is what defines the label. What matters is one's attitude towards the condition, not what you call it.
     
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  14. Resync29

    Resync29 Six of Nine V.I.P Member

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    You went straight to the point with no mucking about, most people can't take that direct approach, especially on Facebook or similar pretentious so called social media.

    I agree with everyone who advised to ditch Facebook, you're too young to use Facebook anyway get rid of it :D
     
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  15. Wolfgangus Faldestolius

    Wolfgangus Faldestolius Little notes from an armchair

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    Maybe you wanted some of them to help you. You could have added that explicitly; and also added, that you thought you would find everybody cool too.

    Does it have a tactful "sit out" facility for when some of them are going over the top about any of their fads that aren't to your taste?

    As a growing individual, one should express oneself especially by one's ongoing comportment.

    Our criteria are something we discover gradually for ourselves as we go.
     
  16. Wolfgangus Faldestolius

    Wolfgangus Faldestolius Little notes from an armchair

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    Well my idea of "routinely" is "not often enough" of course!
     
  17. WolfSpirit

    WolfSpirit Not a dictionary. Or a search engine

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    I knew there was a reason I objected to Facebook on principle, and by extension, social media in general! You just described it perfectly! (AKA typical NT socializing, only taken to an extreme.)
     
  18. Wolfgangus Faldestolius

    Wolfgangus Faldestolius Little notes from an armchair

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    Ephraim, you made your self look like you wanted to form a clique which they have learned by hard experience to discourage. And surely you think the so called "lower" functioning have good hints and tips to offer you?

    I brag about my achievements which aren't visible to others (except that I am neater and wittier than 20 years ago). You could surely intuit how "low" functioning I am (even NTs can do that ;) )

    When we stop being ashamed of ourselves and others we can appreciate unique potential whosever it is, and relax.
     
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  19. Wolfgangus Faldestolius

    Wolfgangus Faldestolius Little notes from an armchair

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    If the layout of the interface doesn't lend to keeping unwanted materials out of your face (I've never tried it) then drop it.
    We'll be here either way.
     
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  20. Aspie_With_Attitude

    Aspie_With_Attitude Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    I had made a video like this, this had got me banned from one Facebook group and had a video dislike when I uploaded this video content back in July 2019.