How to rescue the damsel in distress

[Johnny]

She is sad because her boyfriend just broke up with her and you cannot exactly walk up and volunteer to be her new boyfriend. You can, however, offer to help her take her mind off it by surfing the internet and exploring the different online dating websites. You will coach her about her online profile. Explain that you cannot give her the ex-boyfriend back, and finding another boyfriend does not end the grief of losing her favorite one, but this exploring will help her take her mind off it. IF she will reciprocate by helping you find a girlfriend, that is. After all, nothing you do seems to work.

Of course, unless she is unconscious, she will figure out that there is another possibility...maybe you could be her boyfriend. Maybe not.

 

[Sparticus]

Don't get put into her friends zone...good luck!!!

 

[Ereth]

I take issue with this entire thread. Damsels in distress? Please. If you really care about somebody, you won't take advantage of that person's emotional vulnerability because you're hoping to get lucky.

 

[Gomendosi]

So totally, I mean, it's like, I had to read that whole post, like five or six times before I could find a reason to think it was sexist, it's almost like it isn't, but then it is, because you know, like, everything is if you look at it that way. It's a good thing there are moral police here keeping watch because I was too scandalised to speak up!

Thanks... mods, tear it down or turn it off or shut it up, but just get rid of it!

 

[Ereth]

Gomendosi, there's really no need to mock me. I take things like this seriously, and it's not because this thread is about pursuing vulnerable females, or because I'm female. I don't think people should take advantage of anybody in that kind of situation.

And I'm certainly not calling for the moderators to shut it down. I gave my opinion, just as you're doing now. Forums are a place for multifaceted, complex discussion, so please don't make fun of me for wanting to contribute my thoughts.

 

[Ste11aeres]

Bad idea. If your idea is to become her next boyfriend,

Of course, unless she is unconscious, she will figure out that there is another possibility...maybe you could be her boyfriend. Maybe not.

bad idea.

Why?

Because by volunteering to help her find another boyfriend who isn't you, by becoming her relationship coach, you are putting yourself hard and fast into the friend zone. By doing that, you are sending the message loud and clear that her next boyfriend will be someone other than you.

The only way to (maybe) become her boyfriend is to be an awesome and attractive person.

 

[apt-get]

I take issue with this entire thread. Damsels in distress? Please. If you really care about somebody, you won't take advantage of that person's emotional vulnerability because you're hoping to get lucky.

I agree with this sentiment entirely. The whole "nice guy" thing is a total sham and the guys who try to do the "nice guy" thing are anything but. I think it is safe to say that a person who creates a friendship so they can get laid is automatically disqualified from being nice. Emotional manipulation is never a nice thing.

So totally, I mean, it's like, I had to read that whole post, like five or six times before I could find a reason to think it was sexist, it's almost like it isn't, but then it is, because you know, like, everything is if you look at it that way. It's a good thing there are moral police here keeping watch because I was too scandalised to speak up!

Thanks... mods, tear it down or turn it off or shut it up, but just get rid of it!

What the hell are you talking about? Didn't you used to me a moderator? I think I remember that when I signed up with this account.

Nobody mentioned sexism in this thread until you showed up. Given the manner that you brought it up (whining about claims of sexism), it is probabilistically safe to assume that you are a sexist, regardless of whether or not is overt. I've seen enough of this type of behavior online and there are definite trends in it.

Gomendosi, there's really no need to mock me. I take things like this seriously, and it's not because this thread is about pursuing vulnerable females, or because I'm female. I don't think people should take advantage of anybody in that kind of situation.

And I'm certainly not calling for the moderators to shut it down. I gave my opinion, just as you're doing now. Forums are a place for multifaceted, complex discussion, so please don't make fun of me for wanting to contribute my thoughts.

I have no idea what his deal is.

 

[apt-get]

Of course, unless she is unconscious, she will figure out that there is another possibility...maybe you could be her boyfriend. Maybe not.

This is borderline rape-y. What the hell are you talking about?

I don't think this should have to be stated, but I will anyways. Having sex with someone who is not conscious or is not in a proper state of mind to meaningfully and enthusiastically consent is rape. Don't do it.

 

[Soup]

1. Insulting or personal attacks on other members is prohibited.
2. Do not attempt to "flame", "troll" or bait other members into arguments.
3. Racial, gender (sexist) and religious hatred/discrimination will not be tolerated.

HUH! Looks like someone scored a rule-violation hat-trick! Either we have rules & they apply to everyone or we, like, are totally free to, like openly ridicule other members. Like... maybe IF a mod is unconscious, there will totally be a chance that anyone who so readily mocks a member's concerns, casually tolerates misogyny & applies the rules arbitrarily, cannot get a woman who is not 1st degree relative, to give them the time of day in the first place. A misogynist giving advice about relationships with women is as farcical as an Antisemitic nutter teaching a course on Jewish History!

 

[Johnny]

Oh, I see now...if she is sad because she does not have a boyfriend that makes her off-limits. If everyone considers her to be off limits, she'll never have a boyfriend.

{SARCASM}Good thing you people are so protective, eh?</SARCASM}

You might have a point there if he says he will let her cry on his shoulder but only if she will have sex with him.

Meanwhile, if he offers to help her find a boyfriend as an internet coach, she might think he is such a wonderful guy, but it would be wrong to take advantage of his kindness.

 

[Ereth]

Oh, I see now...if she is sad because she does not have a boyfriend that makes her off-limits. If everyone considers her to be off limits, she'll never have a boyfriend [...]

I think someone trying to recover from a breakup is "off-limits," yes, until he or she recovers. The best thing for that person to do is focus on himself or herself for a while, and even if somebody's interested in him or her, the respectful, right thing to do is wait until that person's feeling okay about dating again. Naturally, it's his or her choice.

Meanwhile, if he offers to help her find a boyfriend as an internet coach, she might think he is such a wonderful guy, but it would be wrong to take advantage of his kindness.

Yes, it would. I can't speak for others, but I certainly would not take advantage of anyone emotionally for any reason. And please drop the attitude---we're all just trying to have a discussion here, okay?