Do You Ever Wish Everyone Knew You Had Aspergers And What It Was?

[Hopeless_Aspie_Guy]

Would life be easier for you if perhaps you didn’t get the annoying hope raising questions of – “So have you got a girlfriend?” or “Do you have kids? ”. Two things I’d wish people would never ask because I just want it to be obvious to the very type of people who’d unknowingly reject me as a friend or lover not to mention the false hope and encouragement it raises. Suddenly you don’t get asked any of this because your ‘condition’ excuses you from wanting a relationship or ever being able to get one.


Or perhaps you’d be able to skip out on those hope raising situations where someone is seemingly friendly with you (maybe even a group of people) and yet the more you act like you, the more alienated you feel. Perhaps they could just avoid you from the start or alter their behavior around you to however they’d be mutually comfortable.


Or the employer who knows you have aspergers and what aspergers is and thus knows you’re not suited for the role (as it involves building relationships with strangers or peddling sales to customers who don’t want your product) rather than you going through the whole process of having to find out yourself.


Or that person who pushes you with “Yes you can do it”, not realizing that having aspergers means it genuinely is much harder to do this task.


Perhaps people might be a bit more forgiving about the things you can’t help but do (even if it’s against your will). Speeches made to large groups wavered. Invites to parties….wavered. All that hassle because perhaps you can’t keep a job…..wavered.
Perhaps you could do what you do in life without being ostracized and made to feel like a weirdo “You make records of xyz, you weirdo, oh ok yer you have aspergers, sorry I forgot”.

 

[Suzanne]

Yes, I do wish for that, but know that realistically it is not going to happen. But what I am striving for is to omit the fact that I am not offically diagnosed and base this on the fact that if I said I had depression etc, no one would question if I had been properly diagnosed! Oh I know why they do question, because they cannot comprehend that I have autism, which, in their mind is very visual!

It is hard going, because of this terrible need to be honest; it seems like a burning missile that if I do not say, I cannot breath properly, but I reason that is just psychological and refrain and it works great.

Actually, some time ago, I blurted out that I have aspergers, because I do not act like other females and often get the sensation of, what is wrong with her? So I told this woman and explained that if she told me a joke, I would not get it and that I am a literal thinker and it seemed a split second later, her husband appeared and asked me to write something down and I said: oh, hang on and I will get my pen and his wife jumped in and gently said: he was teasing and smiled at me to say: I see what you mean.

I am a very quiet person and a very loud person. For years, I could not understand how I could be both! I become loud when I am animated about something and although I do not think I am being over zealous, but by other's reactions, I figure I must be and I want to scream: I have aspergers; please understand that I am not just being contrary!

 

[hiraeth]

I wish that there was a way to transmit a dump of information that communicates exactly what my symptoms / struggles / limitations are, without needing to use a label and then deal with the whole "but I thought this label means xyz but that doesn't seem to be what you look like / are saying". And also without needing to have the awkward disclosure conversation. Like a software patch. Loading.... loading.... beep! All done.

 

[Hopeless_Aspie_Guy]

It is hard going, because of this terrible need to be honest; it seems like a burning missile that if I do not say, I cannot breath properly, but I reason that is just psychological and refrain and it works great.

Yup I have that same thing and very occasionally I choose to battle it and override it.

Actually, some time ago, I blurted out that I have aspergers, because I do not act like other females and often get the sensation of, what is wrong with her? So I told this woman and explained that if she told me a joke, I would not get it and that I am a literal thinker and it seemed a split second later, her husband appeared and asked me to write something down and I said: oh, hang on and I will get my pen and his wife jumped in and gently said: he was teasing and smiled at me to say: I see what you mean.

Sorry but that is kinda funny , fortunately I'm nowhere near that literal and only on the odd occasions am I (albeit to a lesser extent).

I am a very quiet person and a very loud person. For years, I could not understand how I could be both! I become loud when I am animated about something and although I do not think I am being over zealous, but by other's reactions, I figure I must be and I want to scream: I have aspergers; please understand that I am not just being contrary!

Yer I'm a very contradictory person like that in other ways too, ditto for loud and quiet like yourself though.

I wish that there was a way to transmit a dump of information that communicates exactly what my symptoms / struggles / limitations are, without needing to use a label and then deal with the whole "but I thought this label means xyz but that doesn't seem to be what you look like / are saying". And also without needing to have the awkward disclosure conversation. Like a software patch. Loading.... loading.... beep! All done.

Never use the words 'a dump' together, it's actually slang for 'taking a sh*t' lol. But yes I get what you mean and I agree.

 

[Mr Allen]

I wish more people outside of people who need to know about it such as the care industry and the medical profession knew about it, it would make it actually worth declaring AS on job applications if employers knew and understood it better, and I don't just mean employers in the voluntary sector such as Charity shop Managers etc.

 

[Mia]

Just gave blood about an hour ago so, if this seems nonsensical you can do whatever with it. Wish I could do a vulcan mind meld with people like Spock did, passing on all that I know about Asperger's to people while making them slightly uncomfortable. That way my relatives wouldn't whisper when I visited or stop talking when I entered a room. Zap, now you can actually think instead of being idiots gossiping.

 

[tree]

Just gave blood about an hour ago so, if this seems nonsensical you can do whatever withit Wish I could do a vulcan mind meld with people like Spock did and pass on all that I know about Asperger's to people while making them slightly uncomfortable. That way my relatives wouldn't whisper when I visited or stop talking when I came in a room. Zap, now you can actually think instead of being idiots gossiping.

Now if only a smallest bit of your
blood would pass the knowledge
on, an injection would do the trick.

That would be easier on everyone
than the way knowledge can be shared/
passed on/acquired by planaria (flatworms).
They can profit by what the previous worm
knew, once they eat the previous worm.

 

[Suzanne]

Sorry but that is kinda funny , fortunately I'm nowhere near that literal and only on the odd occasions am I (albeit to a lesser extent).

No need to be sorry ( I guess I am taking you literally hehehehe), because I chuckled too, but more out of relief that I proved by action, rather than just by words. At times, taking things literally can be funny, but most times, can cause deep mental anguish, due to misunderstandings.

 

[shinkansen]

Do You Ever Wish Everyone Knew You Had Aspergers And What It Was?

No, I don't think so. Because I've told a few people and now they're starting to point out my aspergers traits.

 

[Hopeless_Aspie_Guy]

I wish more people outside of people who need to know about it such as the care industry and the medical profession knew about it, it would make it actually worth declaring AS on job applications if employers knew and understood it better, and I don't just mean employers in the voluntary sector such as Charity shop Managers etc.

WATCH THEM !!

At times, taking things literally can be funny, but most times, can cause deep mental anguish, due to misunderstandings.

Sorry but they need to televise those moments lol (aspies taking things literally, not you getting angry I mean).

Do You Ever Wish Everyone Knew You Had Aspergers And What It Was?

No, I don't think so. Because I've told a few people and now they're starting to point out my aspergers traits.

I'm gonna say 'interesting'. But I'm guessing it gets on your nerves then. You could always point out their NT traits when they point out your aspie ones.

 

[Southern Discomfort]

Not necessarily because they'll always be those people out there who will make fun of it and use it as ammunition against you. There's an advantage in having something that people don't know a lot about.

 

[Adora]

I haven't really told many people,the only people that know are my husband,oldest brother and aunt,I did tell my mum but it literally went through one ear through the other,I am apprehensive on telling anyone due to feeling they may not get it or not know what it is,but if anyone did come up to me and ask me about it I would say yes but since no one has I see no reason to have to tell anyone but my husband has said that his mum has probably figured it out with me because she did work at a place that helps autistc children and has asked me "questions" but she hasn't asked me have I got Aspergers? But if she did I would say yes.

 

[Hopeless_Aspie_Guy]

Not necessarily because they'll always be those people out there who will make fun of it and use it as ammunition against you. There's an advantage in having something that people don't know a lot about.

I would've thought the pros would outweigh the cons though. I'm permanently susceptible to depression, anxiety and worrying (as of about 5 years ago) and having aspergers factors into why that is. Annoyingly few people would know that I'm different without me telling them or without them being my close friend, so I literally have to explain aspergers (and my traits) to other people if I want them to know that I have it and why I behave or live as I do.

I did tell my mum but it literally went through one ear through the other,I am apprehensive on telling anyone due to feeling they may not get it or not know what it is,but if anyone did come up to me and ask me about it I would say yes but since no one has I see no reason to have to tell anyone

Yer I feel that it's too much info for people to process well enough to remember ongoing and I hardly tell anyone either, but I almost wish I had a reason to (I'm looking for reasons to sometimes).

 

[Judge]

Not at all. The reality is that an overwhelming number of those around you will either not understand or be indifferent to your autism and still expect or demand that you conform to the thinking of a social majority. IMO it's tragically that simple.