Do you also skip school reunions?

[Skeletor]

I used to get invited to high school reunions a lot (they invite everybody), the last one I got was for the 50th. reunion. That was six years ago. I never went to one. High school was not a pleasant experience for me. A couple of months after graduation, I was in Army basic training. I had a easier time with that.

I thought an outstanding diagnosis of autism disqualified you from Army service.

 

[Skeletor]

I wouldn't even know how to learn if I had an upcoming reunion not that I would ever attend one. Do they somehow find a way to contact you? I haven't kept in touch with anyone (deliberate).

They tracked me down for the ten year. They don't do that anymore. I let them know not to do so in very clear terms.

 

[Skeletor]

School reunions?

View attachment 64556

Yep pretty much that.

 

[Crossbreed]

Yes, I skip them. I have burned too many bridges to do otherwise.

 

[Skeletor]

An aside, I went to a university that had a prominent Greek system and it struck me as a haven for people who peaked in high school and wanted to continue living like high school students.

 

[Crossbreed]

I thought an outstanding diagnosis of autism disqualified you from Army service.

At that time, adult diagnoses and ASD1 were both unheard of.

 

[Judge]

I thought an outstanding diagnosis of autism disqualified you from Army service.

Some of us predate such scrutiny. Especially if you didn't have any such diagnosis at the time of induction into the armed forces.

He did, and I suspect so did I. But I elected not to join the military, apart from being raised in a military family myself. Bearing in mind that I had no knowledge of being autistic at the time.

 

[Skeletor]

Some of us predate such scrutiny. Especially if you didn't have any such diagnosis at the time of induction into the armed forces.

He did, and I suspect so did I. But I elected not to join the military, apart from being raised in a military family myself.

I would make a terrible soldier. I'm not coordinated, slow, forgetful, I'm sure I could never pass marksmanship or be able to put an m 16 together from the parts. I know soldiers must learn to do this blindfolded. I also have no tolerance for morons with authority over me.

 

[clg114]

I thought an outstanding diagnosis of autism disqualified you from Army service.

I wasn't diagnosed until I was 62, many years after I got out of the Army. Back then there was a draft, so I didn't have a choice. I went to basic training in the fall of 1964. Being autistic probably would have kept me out way back then and I would have used it if I had known. I did not want to go into the Army. I do not know if it would keep you out now.

 

[Crossbreed]

I do not know if it would keep you out now.

It does (if known).

 

[MoonSarnicola]

I never went to school prom. I wasn't in the senior yearbook or the junior year year book, although I did attend. I graduated over 20 years ago. I have no interest in attending any class reunion. I went to three different school districts. One of those districts I attended twice. I was shipped around a lot. Family life wasn't at all great in the slightest. I was in regular classes. Didn't associate with anyone outside if school. I don't live in any of those areas anymore and no intentions of traveling back. Nothing there for me.

 

[Mia]

Wow, far more common than I thought among us! Didn't go to any reunions, high school, cegep (college) or uni. Nor graduation ceremonies either, I requested that they send diploma's and degrees in the mail. Which the schools did, and when the reunions began to happen I ignored them. Definitely didn't want to go back and relive it again. Glad when it was all over.

 

[Cailan Tangaroa]

I would never go to a school reunion. I still remember how I felt out of place and pretended all the time, trying to fit in and never succeeding. At one point, when I would talk, nobody even turned to react or say anything, as if I didn't exist at all. I couldn't relate to any of their interests and never knew the trendy thing to say and do. I would go home from school exhausted by them and I would sit at the computer to write my stories so I can get away from that memories.

I recently saw one old schoolmate, if you could say that, I mean we never talked or anything at all, but it's been years.. He said hi to me, and I just pretended to myself I didn't know him at all, didn't recognize him. I hated talking to him as he reminded me all the stuff. I felt awkward and disgusting. Even from one person. I can't imagine a whole bunch of them. Scary.

 

[paloftoon]

I would make a terrible soldier. I'm not coordinated, slow, forgetful, I'm sure I could never pass marksmanship or be able to put an m 16 together from the parts. I know soldiers must learn to do this blindfolded. I also have no tolerance for morons with authority over me.

This reminds me of some educational adminstrators I worked with. Totally clueless- I'm like I could be a good administrator if this is what many others are like. It's not easy to get such a position with the proper credentials or connections.

 

[paloftoon]

I wouldn't even know how to learn if I had an upcoming reunion not that I would ever attend one. Do they somehow find a way to contact you? I haven't kept in touch with anyone (deliberate).

I grew up in a rural community. It was small enough where "everyone knew everyone." So, yes, they would find a way to contact you. They'd try to ask friends of yours, friends of your parents, use the phone book if your number is listed if they have to. My parents have asked me to go to a reunion a few times and they even pushed me. I still said no. I asked them who contacted them as I was curious. This girl, who was mute, was put in charge of organizing reunion participants and it was insulting to me. I was like I want nothing to do with that unreliable person. She once used my neighbor (also a classmate at that time) to ask me for a tissue. It took 10 minutes, but I finally gave in because he wouldn't stop asking and it was distracting when I was trying to work on my own homework in Social Studies. I still remember it. I did go up to the girl and tell her how angry I was that she wouldn't ask me herself but that she was okay to ask my neighbor classmate. And that I'm not any less of a person than she or my neighbor friend, but that she would treat me this way. I reiterated to her that she could ask to go to the bathroom or ask so many other people herself. I was pissed.


They told me I could brag about how good I'm doing now and I'm like even if I'm doing better than a lot of them, I might not be doing better than all of them and don't want to deal with it. It won't be fun and it's not an opportunity to make quality friends that I would've had already.

 

[onlything]

There were some I wasn't invited for and then some that I went to since an old friend of mine also attended it. It was... Fine I suppose, just gatherings of people I care little for. Not counting one guy that jumped at me with accusations of not keeping contact, feeling so much better after moving abroad and other petty things (not like he did anything to keep contact but whatever), then proceeded to describe his own successes as if trying to one up me or something. I remember being really confused at the time. As in, what does it matter? Why is he telling me stuff I care nothing for, like his career progress or whatever? If he's happy then that's good for him but it has little relevance to my life.

So, yeah, I realised how much truth there is in saying how often these reunions are just an excuse to trying to prove to others how much better you are... Pointless and petty, that thing. Not going again.

Tho, I suppose it may be my own fault that some people react to me in such way after years. I was a smart but pretty apathetic kid, seemingly arrogant and looking down on others, so possibly those with lower self-confidence felt like they really had something to prove. They don't. I see and treat everyone the same, this country or the other - polite but distanced.

 

[Skeletor]

I wasn't diagnosed until I was 62, many years after I got out of the Army. Back then there was a draft, so I didn't have a choice. I went to basic training in the fall of 1964. Being autistic probably would have kept me out way back then and I would have used it if I had known. I did not want to go into the Army. I do not know if it would keep you out now.

What was your expirence there? I don't imagine it was fun.

 

[Skeletor]

I would never go to a school reunion. I still remember how I felt out of place and pretended all the time, trying to fit in and never succeeding. At one point, when I would talk, nobody even turned to react or say anything, as if I didn't exist at all. I couldn't relate to any of their interests and never knew the trendy thing to say and do. I would go home from school exhausted by them and I would sit at the computer to write my stories so I can get away from that memories.

I recently saw one old schoolmate, if you could say that, I mean we never talked or anything at all, but it's been years.. He said hi to me, and I just pretended to myself I didn't know him at all, didn't recognize him. I hated talking to him as he reminded me all the stuff. I felt awkward and disgusting. Even from one person. I can't imagine a whole bunch of them. Scary.

I hear you and agree. What do you write?

 

[clg114]

What was your expirence there? I don't imagine it was fun.

It wasn't. I lived in a barracks with 30 other men, sharing all of the toilets and showers. Slept in bunk beds, everybody in one big room. There was no privacy. Ate in a mess hall with 100 or so other men. You ate what they gave you and ate off of a tray. The drill instructors were almost always yelling at us. Every individual was referred to as "a troop". As a group we were referred to as "you people". It got a little better after basic training, but not much. I would imagine it is a lot better now.

 

[Au Naturel]

Grade school and high school were painful for me. Lets see, you had kids who thought it was just so funny to yank a chair out from under me while I was sitting down. Others who would put a padlock on my locker so I had to get a janitor to cut it off. I then put a lock of my own in the latch hole but had the inconvience of having to unlock two locks.on the door twice every day. Some tried getting me in trouble by shoving cigarettes up my locker vents. I was and still am both big and strong, but much too slow and clumsy to catch anyone for a physical retaliation, and they well knew this. So I'd get slapped in the head or tripped and they could usually get away. Once I did catch one of them and well did you ever see the film A Christmas Story? It was like that except I beat the kid to a bloody pulp and then beat that bloody pulp into a bloodier pulp. I was lucky to avoid prosecution, and no one cared about the abuse I'd endured for years.

I have no desire to ever see any of these people again. Why would I? I'd much rather be among those I want to be with, rather than those I was forced to endure for reasons of chance and circumstance.

I would go to show them that I'd done better than any of them in life. Living well is the best revenge.