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Markness

Markness

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  • Markness
    My mother attempted to shame me for the AC bill.
    Markness
    I am turning 35 and I still don’t know what to do. :(
    View previous comments…
    Tony Ramirez
    Tony Ramirez
    When I turned 46 back in June I was depressed for two weeks. It was all for nothing.

    My life is good. I have people who care for me and I am socializing.
    MMPATT01
    MMPATT01
    Just another milestone along your journey. I suppose we just keep looking forward and do the best we can.
    Markness
    Markness
    @AngelWitch No one wants to come to my birthdays anymore. :(
    Markness
    My situation feels so unusual as well as novel. I don’t get why I’ve been told that what I am going through isn’t uncommon.
    View previous comments…
    Markness
    Markness
    @Aspychata But how can I find a girlfriend who is on the spectrum? Should I even ask out like say women who are working at gas stations if I find them attractive?
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    You should ask woman out even if you don't find them attractive. You can just get comfortable talking to woman. As you get more comfortable, it gets easier. Look how long you worked at the library, it's now way easier, then when you started. It's these experiences that give us more confidence.
    Gerald Wilgus
    Gerald Wilgus
    I would ask out anybody I knew who I thought was intelligent, then afterwards decide if they are attractive. I had a hard time asking out women I did not know. Happily I decided to call my future spouse without knowing her because I thought it would merely be transactional - ride sharing to a trail maintenance project. Little did I know . . .
    Markness
    My detractors are probably celebrating the fact I am still single. :(
    View previous comments…
    Markness
    Markness
    @AngelWitch The long stretches of loneliness and not getting to do certain things from not having a partner I don’t find to be worth it.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Why would they be so invested? I don’t think they are thinking about you at all.

    Some of your friends here are thinking of you, like me. People who care about you will think about you. Others will not.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    There are trolls everywhere even irl. Don't live up to their expecting, live up to your own.
    Markness
    I don’t know whether it’s ok or not to ask out the women who work at Dutch Bros. who behave friendly to me, especially after they’ve seen me as a customer for a long while now.
    View previous comments…
    Markness
    Markness
    I’ve asked her questions about stuff but I can’t recall what she said.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Don't stress.
    Markness
    Markness
    Depression eats away my memories, especially if they were positive ones. It’s like it can’t stomach the bad ones and will vomit them back up.
    Markness
    I find it sad that I don’t have a loving partner but apparently it’s bad I feel that way.
    View previous comments…
    Gerald Wilgus
    Gerald Wilgus
    Feeling sad is OK as long as it spurs you to change. It is only bad if all you are doing is stirring a pot of "woe is me."
    Raggamuffin
    Raggamuffin
    Perhaps try new positive routines like Tony. Yoga, fitness - things which get you out and about, and also working on your wellbeing. Exercise is proven to help with mood, and if it's also in a group setting you have the chance to speak to new people.
    L
    Luca
    How the hell did I select a laughing emoji on this one?? I'm so sorry, that was clearly an accident. I meant to click on the heart, I promise. :(
    Markness
    I am having nightmares in regular succession again. :(
    View previous comments…
    tree
    tree
    Yes, surely.

    What insights are you able to derive from these experiences?
    Markness
    Markness
    I have no control of my life and others are always trying to harm me.
    tree
    tree
    'no control' and 'always'

    Those are examples of thinking in absolute terms,
    rather than matter of degree.
    Markness
    As much as Discord stressed me out, I sometimes feel like I am missing out not using it.
    Misery
    Misery
    Just because people use it doesnt mean it's a good thing. Everyone uses Twitter, and THAT is an utter cesspool. And I wouldnt take the relationship bit seriously. What you see/hear is often different from what is.
    tree
    tree
    www.verywellmind.com

    Do You Have FOMO? Here Is How to Cope

    FOMO, or the fear of missing out, is a real and increasingly common phenomenon that can cause significant stress. Learn how to recognize and manage it.
    www.verywellmind.com www.verywellmind.com
    Markness
    I arrived where the social mixer is supposed to take place but besides myself and an older gentleman, no one else, not even the event host, has arrived.
    View previous comments…
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    That's a bad sign. They should update you.
    Markness
    Markness
    @tree No to both questions.

    @Aspychata Stuff like this makes me not want to even bother with socializing anymore.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Maybe don't depend on them for socializing. They don't aren't successful at organizing that. You just need to find another format. Spearhead a fund raising for the library? Take a poll on what improvements people would like to see at the library. Then be part of the effort. Great way to meet people. Or learn about applying for additional funding for your library.
    Markness
    I am glad there are those who care about me on this forum. :)
    Misery
    Misery
    I'm glad you're here with us.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Same here, Markness. It is wonderful to have a caring community full of understanding and willingness to help each other out. None has to be perfect here. I am glad, too.
    Markness
    I am always alone at night these days. :(
    AdamG
    AdamG
    you are always very negative - I'm sure there are things you enjoy that you can share with us?
    Metalhead
    Metalhead
    Get an Xbox and join me in many adventures. I am sorry I cannot make a better offer since you are too far away. I would love to drag you to metal shows.
    KevinMao133
    KevinMao133
    I’m the same bro. Keep your head up brother. We here to support you
    Markness
    I keep waking up during sleep now. :(
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Breathing problems?
    Nightmares?
    Too hot?
    Too cold?
    Markness
    Markness
    The first two can sometimes wake me up. I also feel anxious even when I am tired and pain will suddenly surge in my body.
    Markness
    Do I need to become a “bad boy” or “jerk?”
    View previous comments…
    Gerald Wilgus
    Gerald Wilgus
    You just need to up your charm. First learn to recognize body language and social communication. I now know that I was blind to such and could not recognize if a girl/woman was interested in me. Sorting things out I began changing when I once thought as you did but realized that I never acted to offer women a choice.

    S
    Slime_Punk
    It's really hard to be somebody you're not for an extended period of time. You have to make small changes gradually, otherwise your ego will slap you back down and make you feel ashamed for being the jerk you so desire to be when you do something that hurts someone's feelings.
    S
    Slime_Punk
    I don't recommend becoming a jerk, but if you dedicate yourself to it, you can change your entire persona and make it stick if you nurture the process.
    Markness
    I worry that I may be unlovable. :(
    View previous comments…
    Gerontius
    Gerontius
    Markness, if you are like your online self in real life, the flood of self pity is not looking good on you. Ignore "detractors" and read Dale Carnegie
    Tony Ramirez
    Tony Ramirez
    I don't feel unloved by people I interact with. They are usually friendly to me.
    Judge
    Judge
    I'm inclined to think that someone has to really get to know you over time to make such a conclusion.
    Markness
    I want a better life but I am worried it’s too late for it to actually get better.
    Tony Ramirez
    Tony Ramirez
    Same here.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    I want a better life, so I’m going to make it happen.

    I am no better than you, we just have a different attitude in this way.

    If you want it, do it. Never too late.
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