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AprilR
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  • My only friend understands nothing about me. People here dont seem to comprehend the idea that "social intelligence" exists and is a thing
    S
    Slime_Punk
    I definitely think this world would do a lot better if we focused on emotional intelligence over regular IQ as well. The way things are (and are measured) breeds a strange level of narcissism and ignorance that ends up ultimately hurting people
    AprilR
    AprilR
    That's true too but what i meant was, they think everyone has the same social intelligence they do. That they have normal friends, have relationships, can connect and make friends easily. They dont understand the difficulties we face bc we can solve math problems
    BobbiSueEllen
    BobbiSueEllen
    Understand that well. Autism is a weird thing: it reduces most of us to very few friends...or even one. And even they can have difficulty "getting us" at times. The saddest hallmark of autism is its biggest one: solitude...kinda like how Brain describes it on Arthur.
    I got lost yet again and i am so late for work.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    When i ask for the bus stop please direct me to a bus stop dont say "oh its so close you can walk" Because i get lost bc i have no sense of direction like you people
    The more i force myself to do things instead of overthinking the better i feel
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Feel like a sim sometimes. Wash the dishes/clean the house=positive feelings
    Once again disappointed with someone i thought i liked. People show their true colors pretty fast. I feel alone.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Taking chances on connecting with people is so hard. Full respect to you for trying.

    Sometimes, it’s better to know early on instead of getting all caught up in things before you realize who you’re dealing with.

    1698316855297.jpeg
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Thank you very much. You are right to say it is better to know stuff early on. The guy seems sexist and old fashioned as most men i know are
    elgat0verde
    elgat0verde
    I am sorry things did not work out, but it's just one dude, dude...

    There are 8 billion people in the world and one bad apple does not define a whole orchard

    The right people are out there and as @Aspychata said you ain't alone!

    You've got you :)
    My only friend might also like my crush. I can already see where this i going lol.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Hopefully i am wrong as it would be very awkward since she was the one who introduced us and tried to play matchmaker
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Oh dear. That's bizarre. What a twist.
    Is it crush anxiety i am feeling or regular social anxiety? I dont even know
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I want to see my therapist as soon as possible
    Gerald Wilgus
    Gerald Wilgus
    Do you get to choose what anxiety you want?
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I would prefer if its crush anxiety haha
    Going on a date on the year 2023 as an autistic woman in a third world country..
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Don't forget to have fun. Laugh, giggle, and tell stupid jokes. Lol
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I had a good time, he seems like a cute person. I dont see myself having a relationship with anyone though and it is making me confused
    Gerald Wilgus
    Gerald Wilgus
    You may not see yourself in a relationship, but I think your limbic brain (reptilian - the seat of emotions) is saying to you . . . "Gee, that was nice." I hope he follows up.
    Dating is hard when you have no idea what someone else is thinking
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Maybe just take it one step at a time and don’t run away just yet. I don’t really know… I’m not good at relationships. I just thought it might be worth a try to see where this goes.
    oregano
    oregano
    I agree with you, @AprilR. I don't like it when people recognize me. I don't want to have any relationships of most any kind because they quickly end badly. Not to mention the threat of physical harm when they do. I don't know anybody where I live, and I like it that way.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I pray to God that people dont harm me physically. I am emotionally damaged as it is
    I had a fight with my only friend. I am not feeling good. Yesterday we went drinking with a couple of guys and they forced me to go to another club and later TO ANOTHER CITY except i said no like a rational person.
    Gerald Wilgus
    Gerald Wilgus
    Have you tried groups that align with your interests? I made progress to break out of my isolation when I got involved with Sierra Club outings. The people were welcoming and not concerned with my neurology. I really learned how to be social and mistakes were forgiven. I have friends from that for 40 years and also met my future spouse.
    Gerald Wilgus
    Gerald Wilgus
    @AprilR I like that you have a good sense of self and can advocate for yourself. Those are excellent characteristics in having a good internal compass. I like that!
    Trophonius
    Trophonius
    It's crazy to do that, unless you're a teenager and probably on drugs.
    Came home from a meeting with new friends. I was too anxious to talk to them and did not have anything to say. I feel so worthless. I am crying right now.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Thank you so much guys.
    The people i met were" live fast die young" types also which i could not relate at all.
    Gerald Wilgus
    Gerald Wilgus
    @AprilR I was living for the long game so I could never understand the live fast crowd who have the attention span of fleas. Yet, I was envious of their social experiences.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Thinking it over, i understood i felt really uncomfortable around them, as i posted in my new status
    Update on the job situation: My employer still did not hire anyone new and thinks the workload is not much. My coworker whom i started to share the workload with said she might quit.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Well at least i have understood its not all in my head. My coworker thinks the same way as me
    Judge
    Judge
    That was the last straw between me and the corporation I sweated blood over for nearly 20 years. They laid off half the department and expected the remaining workers to pick up all the slack.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Ugh this sounds too familiar.. I thought that i was just incapable and not fast enough but my coworker agrees with me. It made me feel like there really is a problem, it is not just in my head
    Burning some scented candles and having hibiscus tea~ feeling some kind of autumn-y
    elgat0verde
    elgat0verde
    Hibiscus is so good dude! You can enjoy it cold too! It's one of my favorite flavors of "Aguas frescas"
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I never had that but it sounds delicious! I love all kinds of herbal teas, bubble tea, iced tea and the like also!
    elgat0verde
    elgat0verde
    That's so cool dude! I am learning to appreciate tea more! So far I've loved green tea, lemongrass tea and spearmint tea oh and this cherry tea was pretty legit good
    Random fact about me: I like the Earthsea books, but i did not like The Tombs of Atuan. I wish Tenar would have stayed as Arha
    AprilR
    AprilR
    A priestess drawing forth power from old evil gods is more interesting to me than a story about freedom through love or whatever
    I had a wonderful dream, i regretted having waken up.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I miss being in love, no i miss being in love with one specific person
    Recently a coworker said she worried about me when my mom had surgery, about whether i had someone i can rely on. She prob. understood i did not have many friends. She often asks me "do you wish you had siblings?" bc to her being an only child is weird.
    I feel very alone. I really wish i lived in another country rn because there is no help for autistic people where i live, no autism support groups, no group homes, no accomodations no Nothing. I feel like i dont even exist sometimes
    AprilR
    AprilR
    And like, i feel like i have no right to pretend to be nt when i am not. I dont want potential boyfriends to know i am autistic, bc they prob. Dont even know what that is, and why i dont want children, and why i dont have any friends. Why i cant do anything properly.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Is work getting to you? You sound more down than usual. I know work office affects you.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    It def. affects me a lot. But its not only that. Losing a 15 years friendship, bad relationship with family members etc.
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