Who has less emotions? NT or Auties?

[freewaydog]

NT's definitely have LESS emotions, I feel,....

 

[Judge]

I'm inclined to think it's not about who has more or less emotions, but rather who at any given time has the capacity to read them and who has the capacity to project them sufficiently to be read.

Like empathy I have emotions, but they can't always be projected enough for an NT to read what I'm really thinking or implying.

 

[Ylva]

1. That god awful, sh** eating smile they NEVER TAKE OFF
2. Nothing. Not even an upraised eye brow.

I think that is their social mask.

Ours tend to be thinner, fall off easier, and appear to be manually operated, but we do have them. I prefer the blank expression, as it requires less concentration to maintain. If I slip up and show emotion in public, NTs will treat me like a child. F them.

 

[gregmcph]

Gym exercise is an internal thing. Stewing in your own thoughts as you run on the hamster wheel.

Sometimes you are thinking of what you have to buy at the supermarket, sometimes you're looking at your time and trying to beat it. Sometimes you're just thinking "I hate this. How long do I have to go?"

Have fun imaging what people are thinking, but it's not the place to observe a wide range of human emotion.

 

[Reedstorm17]

Oh my gosh, I never noticed that. But now that I think about it... I need to experiment.

 

[Adora]

The resting b***h face yeah I think I'm guilty of that too I was at a birthday party with my husband in November and I kept having one of his friends ask me "smile adora why do you always look miserable?" I wasn't miserable or angry at the time.

 

[Zarazai]

I've always loved this video. The amount of times I get asked "what's wrong?" or get told that I should cheer up is ridiculous. IT'S JUST MY FACE.

My ex had "resting ***** face" but since I'm absolutely terrible at reading facial expressions I could never tell when something was wrong or when she just had her normal expression on.

 

[Jerry]

One rule that I've always followed that applies to what you are saying is "never trust someone who is always smiling." No one can be happy all of the time. Those people always have a god awful strained grin that looks more like cringing than smiling. My dad calls the expression "The Joker Smile".

I'm a pharmacist.... I have learned to recognize that fake smile from drug seekers. They pretend to be your best friend. Eesh, they're creepy.

 

[Bellatrix]

Oh goodie, some good old-fashioned NT-bashing

Seriously though, why do so many N.T.'s cackle like hyenas for NO reason whatsoever, and often at the most unexpected of times? You may be having a conversation with one of them, and then all of a sudden - HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! "Um... what? I didn't say anything funny. Why are you laughing?"

Then of course there is "The Big Bang Theory", which takes this to unprecedented heights.

 

[fuðflogi]

It bothers me when NTs say we do not show emotion. I have been watching NT faces a lot lately since I have been rendered deaf by having to use such massive hearing protection and music on top of it to survive the gym.

I notice THEY are the ones who use about two expressions.
1. That god awful, sh** eating smile they NEVER TAKE OFF
2. Nothing. Not even an upraised eye brow.

How can they say we have no emotion??? The auties and Aspies I know at a group I go to have MANY emotions, very slight indeed, but there. A tiny smile may show or a twinkle of the eye or a movement of the lips.

None of this is on NT faces.

I am thinking what they say about us is WRONG. It is not us who cannot read emotions. They think we have none because THEY are the ones who cannot read these slight and subtle and beautiful emotions we emit.

I see it all the time. NTs are flat, boring and do NOT show anymore than two or three emotions. Over and over I see this. Of course they think we show none because they are blind to us in every way.

You see if I am right. Go to where there are auties and Aspies and watch how tiny little movements show you clues. Now go to NTs if you can stand it and see......nothing. Dead.

No wonder why want to kill us. We are alive, beautiful, breathing mystery every minute and they are already half dead, predictable, and putting their narrow existence on US.

I think it's that they learn from early on that showing emotion makes you vulnerable.

 

[YoungInnovation]

I don't have the negative experiences some of you seem to have with neurotypical people. I find it impossible to make generalizations about them because they're the majority of mankind and vastly differ interpersonally. There's so many different personalities out there, whether NT or ASD.

I know stony-faced people, I know people who wear their heart on their sleeves and/or faces. Both on and off the spectrum. Absolutely scumbags and wonderful people, on and off the spectrum as well. I know more terrible NT people, for sure, but that's simply because there's more of them.

I'm one of those people with a semi-permanent smile. It's because I have a cheerful disposition, but also because I tend to see the humour in many situations and because humour is my #1 defense mechanism. Even when I'm crying I'll find some way to joke about it.
And I smile because I'm friendly and I've learned that people are more likely to have a friendly disposition towards me if I smile.

I understand where you are coming from. A smile is a great thing to show in the right situations. It makes you look more approachable and friendly. I'm a humor guy myself. I love humor because you can turn pain into pleasure, and make lemonade out of lemons, as cliché as it sounds. I used to be in some of the best situations but not appreciate them because I was not actually enjoying the moment and was lost on how humor even worked. But when you have humor, even some of the worst situations can feel just a little bit better. You can create your own paradise.

 

[xDominiel]

I think that is their social mask.

My experience is that socialization is often like a game, and that most people are very rarely genuine. They're ironically not "just being themselves".

 

[Devany]

I guess I should not be trusted them. Actually what you have to look out for is if the smile reaches the eyes or not. A false smile never reaches the eyes, but a real smile does and causes the eyes to sparkle.

It's called the Duchenne Smile. A smile that reaches the eyes which truly reflects an inner experience of joy, mirth, enjoyment. There exist a many psychological studies describing this smile versus the fake 'only mouth' version described above.

 

[thepeaguy]

Not all autistics suffer from alexithymia.

People with Autism Can Read Emotions, Feel Empathy

Users here should read this article, as we all suffer from this unfair stereotype.

 

[Devany]

It must be frustrating when NTs say that Aspies lack empathy or emotions...I believe it's not a matter of who has more or less emotions but rather a question of the differences in the ways that people with aspergers feel and express emotions and the way NTs feel and express emotions. I am NT female and let me tell you i am an emotional roller-coaster. I feel things intensely and have trouble regulating me emotional experiences sometimes. However, I am very good at hiding it. As @fudhflogi mentionned, NTs have learned specific ways of relating to emotions (i.e. dont be vulnerable, dont be angry) and were reinforced for the specific ways we responded. I consider myself to be very emotionally expressive. I believe that how I express may be different from the way an Aspie might express an emotion and I think here is where lies the difficulty in understanding each other. We essentially speak different emotional languages. People always says 'emotions are a universal language'. Uh. No. We have all been taught to interact and express our emotions differently and its not always easy to get on the same wavelength. I think making our interpretations and feelings explicit is something most NTs need to work on, not just to better communicate with Aspies, but with each other and with themselves.

 

[fuðflogi]

Not all autistics suffer from alexithymia.

People with Autism Can Read Emotions, Feel Empathy

Users here should read this article, as we all suffer from this unfair stereotype.

That's for sure, it's like if I don't feel emotions and empathy(so strongly I can't process it well) then why have I always been told " your just being over sensative"" my whole life.

 

[ezcare]

When no one has been challenged, then they do not have to think about it, but we aspies are always challenged and thus, we have to think about it.

I have often been accused of "thinking too much" by NT friends and even family members. Funerals are one event that truly differentiates me from NTs. In order to get through a funeral, especially of a relative or close friend, I have to put on my "seriously sad" mask and utter statements that are meaningless to me. Yet, even while I am spouting them, my conscious mind is busy reconciling how I really felt about the deceased. I cannot miss something that was only an illusion on my part. But I will hold close forever every kind word and pleasant experience I've had with the deceased. So I cannot say that I will "miss them" because their spirit has not left me.

 

[Bolletje]

Funerals are an emotional nightmare for me. I'm overly empathic, so even if I didn't like the deceased, I will start crying the moment a eulogizer's voice cracks with emotion. And I can't stop. It's like years worth of pent up sadness are released all at once, and all I can think about is how I would feel if it was one of my loved ones in the coffin.
This feels incredibly awkward as people often wonder why I'm grieving so intensely over someone I barely knew.

 

[Judge]

To me this would amount to a "trick question".

Unless of course the title is changed to "Who visually projects less emotions?"

There's a profound difference, IMO.

 

[MrSpock]

I'm fairly sure that I experience emotion more than most people, but I am not seen that way typically because I hide it somewhat. I feel forced to hide it because it is often seen as inappropriate.

Facial expressions and body language are hard-wired, people of all cultures smile when happy, cry when sad, we do not have to learn this. I too smile when happy and cry when sad, and I can read this in others. I can often read anger with confidence, however people can be angry without me knowing it. Anything else and I'm lost.

I'm pretty sure that part of Asperger's (at least in my case) is that this hard-wiring of emotional expression is different than in most people, so I have learned that I cannot read this with reliable accuracy. Others misinterpret my emotions too, the result of this same phenomenon, it's like I have the same reactions inside but use a different language and NTs are unaware of this so they misinterpret and I just know that I don't know, I sort of misinterpret but don't place any value on the information I receive.

I took a test from Cambridge the other day, it was in two parts, faces only and voice only. I scored way worse than even most aspies on the faces, but strangely way better than any group with the voices.

As with Ezcare, I am often accused of "thinking too much". I now wonder if this is a result of my facial expression. I have previously thought that it was simply a result of me actually thinking, that the vast majority of people don't think enough, and if I'm different in that then good for me, they should think more.