What do YOU look at?

[Autistamatic]

A post in another thread set my mind racing because someone mentioned something that struck a chord with me. They mentioned shoes in the context of people who are overly conformist.

Conformity does more harm than good to society

I have always used shoes as a measure of people. Whatever information I may miss in their body language or tone due to flooding I have often found shoes to be a good judge of character. I have found that the shoes someone wears and their state of repair has been a good (though not perfect) guide to what I can expect from an individual.
May I ask what unconventional methods the rest of you guys & gals have used to get a measure of people you interact with?

 

[Tom]

A
I have always used shoes as a measure of people. Whatever information I may miss in their body language or tone due to flooding I have often found shoes to be a good judge of character. I have found that the shoes someone wears and their state of repair has been a good (though not perfect) guide to what I can expect from an individual.
May I ask what unconventional methods the rest of you guys & gals have used to get a measure of people you interact with?

That's the silliest way to judge people I've ever heard of.

 

[clg114]

I do not feel like I need to be judging people, but I generally do not like someone who acts like a jerk.

 

[Gritches]

A smart mugger will look at the shoes when sizing up a mark. Money on the feet, money in the pocket; the shoes themselves are valuable, as well.

 

[Nervous Rex]

I have a tendency to both feel people out and judge them by their language.

The first thing I need to know when getting to know someone new is their sense of humor. I keep my humor to myself until I know how they'll take it. For this, I usually throw out a few subtle one-liners to see how they react. "It's nice to meet you, Rex" "Thanks. It's nice to be met." or "how tall are you?" "I'm five-foot seventeen" or "We'll burn that bridge when we get to it." or "How are you, Rex?" "Oh, I'm doing just how are you?" (I run that together quickly and wait to see if they realize I never answered their question). If I see no signs of a sense of humor, I'll be very brief with the person, partly because brief is safe, partly because I find talking to someone without a sense of humor to be very boring.

After that comes their vocabulary. The more profanity I hear, the more I judge them to be incapable of thinking for themselves. You can argue against me on that, but it's a pretty firm prejudice of mine. I pay attention to the rest of their vocabulary to know how big or small of words to use. Do I need to tone down my vocabulary or will I struggle to keep up with their vocabulary?

Lastly comes what they talk about, to help me figure out what they deem important. This is the biggest and best predictor of behavior. Find out what a person's "rewards" are, and their priorities, and you can make pretty good guesses as to how they'll behave in most volatile situations.

 

[Autistamatic]

That's the silliest way to judge people I've ever heard of.

Maybe my phraseology was flawed there. I merely mean that to me it's an indication of what to expect. High heels, brogues, trainers, scruffy or well maintained, says much about a person and it gives me a basis upon which to start. Do you think I was suggesting I would judge someone solely (forgive the pun) on the shoes they're wearing?
My question was about first impressions, nothing more.

 

[Autistamatic]

Rex I must agree with you on humour. It counts for a lot. Humour is very subjective and two people who see eye to eye on humour are likely, though not definitely, going to have similar attitudes/opinions.

 

[tducey]

A person's actions and personality are how I judge a person.

 

[On the Inside]

I'll go with humor, as well. If I make you laugh, you make me laugh, then its a good guage of temperament, itelligence and character.

Nothing else will put me at ease with others than sharing a funny observation, joke or story.

 

[Ezra]

Maybe my phraseology was flawed there. I merely mean that to me it's an indication of what to expect. High heels, brogues, trainers, scruffy or well maintained, says much about a person and it gives me a basis upon which to start. Do you think I was suggesting I would judge someone solely (forgive the pun) on the shoes they're wearing?
My question was about first impressions, nothing more.

I remember reading something like that in a story. It was a method used by a detective I believe. Maybe it was Sherlock Holmes.

When I looked up the subject, there where many articles about it.

What Your Favorite Shoes Say About Your Personality

 

[Nitro]

I generally form my first opinion of people by looking at their nostrils.
Yes, definitely their nostrils, and quite accurate I might add...

 

[Ezra]

I look at peoples teeth. It doesn't really tell me anything about them. I'm just preoccupied with teeth.

 

[Nitro]

Usually pay attention to how people are around other's first, how they treat others. How others respond to them. Watch their faces from a distance, their eyes, what they do with their bodies, how they stand, what they do with their arms and hands.

Don't usually pay attention to clothing right away, although many women can usually tell from a distance the cost of clothing and footwear. Quite often people who dress in a casual manner, do so because they can and don't care what others think.

Some of the the wealthier people I've encountered dressed in a casual manner, and the poorer individuals 'dressed up.' I once asked an acquaintance who had emigrated from another country why she was so perfectly dressed all the time, "because I have to be, to be treated with respect" was her reply. She didn't have the choice of dressing as casually as others. Perhaps, the 'dressing up' or the 'dressing down' is a statement in and of itself.

Some of the most rotten people I have ever encountered were wearing Armani suits

 

[Nervous Rex]

Usually pay attention to how people are around other's first, how they treat others.

I’ve heard that two good measure of a person’s character are:
How they treat those that wait on them or work for them.
How they treat those who can’t do anything for them.

I’ve seen some people that were professional and polite in the office, but rude and demeaning to waitstaff. I lost all respect for them.

 

[Nervous Rex]

Some of the the wealthier people I've encountered dressed in a casual manner, and the poorer individuals 'dressed up.' I once asked an acquaintance who had emigrated from another country why she was so perfectly dressed all the time, "because I have to be, to be treated with respect" was her reply. She didn't have the choice of dressing as casually as others. Perhaps, the 'dressing up' or the 'dressing down' is a statement in and of itself.

I deliberately dress differently based on how I want to be perceived. If I’m giving a presentation, it’s business formal, to say “I’ve got my act together. Listen to me.” If I’m going to a team meeting, business casual. If I am going to a trade show and trying to see how our competitors’ products work, it’s jeans and a t-shirt because I want the salespeople to dismiss me at a glance.

 

[clg114]

Some of the most rotten people I have ever encountered were wearing Armani suits

That is probably how they got a Armani suit.

 

[SusanLR]

If it is a first time business type encounter, I always wait for them to do the greetings and I pay attention
to tone of voice and actions. Do they seem sincere or just phony greetings?

If I get the chance to observe people in a group, I notice body language and language.
Again, do they seem honest, caring, non-caring, shallow, grumpy, etc.
If they are with someone, I listen to voice tones and how they speak to the one they are with.
I hear interactions between so many couples that sounds like they can't stand each other I wonder
why they are together.

As far as clothes. I too notice shoes.
Don't know why, maybe I have a thing for shoes.
They do show a bit of personality IMO.
Rugged, sporty, professional, clean or dirty, comfortable.
Kind of shows what's important to the person. It does with me.
I always wear comfortable. Either sandels or sneaks.
I also usually notice bling. Necklaces tell a lot. What they symbolise.
Crosses, hearts, crystals, fashionable, gold or silver, big chains, dainty, etc.
I have an obsession with rocks and I wear natural stone jewelry.

 

[Mr Allen]

I generally form my first opinion of people by looking at their nostrils.
Yes, definitely their nostrils, and quite accurate I might add...

Well I suppose it's better than looking DOWN your nose at people!

 

[Progster]

No, I don't think any aspect of a person's outward appearance is an accurate measure of a person's character. People often dress to create a public image, they dress according to how they want people to see them rather than who they really are. I think that the only way do judge a person is to get to know them better, to get beyond the facade that they present to the world.

I used to look at people's book, music or DVD collection to get an idea of what they might be like. That's a good way of gauging their taste, but not a good indicator of character. I have known some people to speak in a highly intellectual manner, and then go home, Homer out and get excited over shows like The Voice or [insert country]'s Got Talent.

I usually wait, watch and keep my distance until I have an idea of what a person might be like, based on their general behaviour.

 

[balsabonbon]

I'm not generally very good at forming first impressions that end up being much in line with how a person ends up seeming once I've known them for a while. I've found it to be incredibly frustrating that I can't read people better.

That said, I agree with what several people have already said in earlier posts in this thread. One of the huge indicators for me (of character and/or whether or not I want to spend more time with a person) is how that person treats people who can't give anything back in return. In other words, if that person can't pay you back in any way, do you still go out of your way to be helpful or kind or even just a decent human being? I also tend to notice if a person is rude or dismissive or if they can't wait their turn in a queue without getting irritated or feeling like they should be served before the people in front of them.

To go back to the above paragraph, I also notice when someone does something for someone who can't repay them, but then the "giver" feels the need to splash the story of their deed(s) all over the place, as if to get repaid for their good deed by getting praised for it from their friends/family/acquaintances/random people they meet at the grocery store, etc.. There's not much that is more of a turn-off to me than someone who brags about their good deeds. I mean, I suppose there are instances where telling someone else of a good deed can be inspiring to others and can help encourage others to also contribute in whatever way they can, but I tend to lean toward believing that, if anyone should be telling about the good deed, it should be the person who was helped by it and not the giver. Maybe that doesn't make any sense, but it is the way I think and one of the ways I evaluate people.

Yet another way I evaluate a person is by listening to the tone of their voice and whether or not they seem sincere. Insincerity annoys me, and I don't generally want to waste my time on a person who's insincere.

I suppose there are probably lots of other little things that I notice about a person right away, but those are the ones that stand out in my mind the most.