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Should I send another message to this woman?

Discussion in 'Love, Relationships and Dating' started by Greatshield17, Jan 26, 2021.

  1. Greatshield17

    Greatshield17 Catholic Nerd V.I.P Member

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    Awhile ago, I went through some new matches on Catholic Match, and I came across one match that I liked, (I think most, if not all of the woman in that list of new matches were women that I liked) so I sent her a message commenting on one of her photos in an effort to start a conversation and relationship. I waited awhile and I received a notification on my email stating that she viewed my profile and then no response to my message; I presumed that this meant that I didn't meet her criteria as I assume it does most of the time these things happen. But then later on, I got a notification saying that I and this woman in question are now a mutual match, that means that she approved of me on her list of matches; however she still didn't respond to my message. At first decided to just wait and see if she'll ever respond, assuming that most likely, she just has me on her "maybe" list and is looking for someone more appealing to her. But now I'm wondering, what if it's a test or something and she's just waiting to see if I can show her my assertiveness or something like that?

    Should I send her another a message or continue waiting? What is your advice?
     
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  2. Bolletje

    Bolletje Overly complicated potato V.I.P Member

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    I wouldn’t send a message. If she was interested, she would have responded.
     
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  3. unperson

    unperson Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Difficult to feel hopeful.
     
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  4. Gracey

    Gracey Well-Known Member

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    I agree with Bolletje & Unperson.
    I also wish some women wouldn't play games.

    When she read your profile and didn't respond.
    Personally, I would have read that as a No.

    But when she approved you as a match I'm like, eh? *scratches head, puzzled*

    Do people often 'play games' on those sites?
    I'm not talking about Minecraft or Mahjong, I'm talking about popularity contests? ego boosts?...
    ... the more approved matches they can collect, the more they attract?
    (are the matches visible to others?)

    I don't know much about dating sites so I don't know if playing games is a thing?

    There could be many different reasons why she hasn't replied to your messages.
    I'd hate to try to guess.

    I also can't get my head around your idea of her 'testing' you?
    Is that also a thing on dating sites? testing people?
    Equates to playing games in my mind.

    Of course it's entirely your decision if you're going to message her again, or not.
    If someone didn't bother replying to my message I think I'd be looking elsewhere.
    (because I'm worth a reply and don't get into game playing)
    but that's just me :)
     
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  5. Aspychata

    Aspychata Serenity waves, beachy vibes

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    Give it a week, and send a short hello. Start as friends. Some woman are scared off if you hit the relationship button too fast.
     
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  6. OkRad

    OkRad μῆνιν ἄειδε θεὰ Πηληϊάδεω Ἀχιλῆος οὐλομένην V.I.P Member

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    I'd do it. She probably has several on the match list. Make yourself known. Then if it's a no-go, you haven't lost an time and you can move on.
     
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  7. VictorR

    VictorR Random Member V.I.P Member

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    I'd wait a bit, send *one* followup and if they don't respond to that, then that's the end of that.
     
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  8. Kalinychta

    Kalinychta Well-Known Member

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    I’d send her another message. Be funny and creative and interesting. Be yourself. If she doesn’t respond after that, move on.
     
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  9. Aspychata

    Aspychata Serenity waves, beachy vibes

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    l didn't hear from this handsome one until l left site. Then l was so surprised when they called. But very happy. If they hadn't bothered, my whole life may have taken a different path. They started the ball rolling and l finally jumped into life again. This is one lifetime, and they helped me towards independence but in a very gentle way. They dangled a * hope carrot* in front of me. lol
     
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  10. Greatshield17

    Greatshield17 Catholic Nerd V.I.P Member

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    Sorry it took me so long to respond, as far as I know, the number of mutual matches a person has isn't visible on CatholicMatch.
     
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  11. Gracey

    Gracey Well-Known Member

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    Thank you.
    Forgive me if I sounded blunt.
    Generally, I don't knowingly mess around with peoples feelings or lead them a merry dance.
    If everyone did the same we'd all know where we stood with no guessing and uncertainties.
    But that's just me and my own perspective. Doesn't necessarily follow that all do the same.

    How you described this woman's actions has confused me. Only because she hasn't responded to your messages in the same way I would.
    Doesn't necessarily make her wrong though.
    Just makes the situation hard to read, unclear and a little confusing.
     
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  12. TopherPwn

    TopherPwn Well-Known Member

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    Normally I wouldn't chase, but rematching I'd ask them on a date. Short simple want to get coffee sometime. Just don't wait to long as she might've found someone to talk too the first time around. I normally wouldn't do a second so no chance on a third.

     
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  13. paloftoon

    paloftoon Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    People do play games. Even in real life, just in different ways :(
     
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