I think that was well said
@Hypnalis I agree. We do not know someones full story just by a few words "painted" on a screen. Much has been left unsaid by OP. And MUCH has been said by others. I came here for a community of people filled with kindness and a sense of belonging. Maybe Im being presumptuous but a judge free zone. In a world where all we are is judged.
Sometimes if you dont have something nice to contribute to the OP it is best not to say anything at all.
With that being said as unpopular as it would be I still would like to hear from
@TouhouFan28 if they are comfortable
. But I would understand if they are not comfortable after that "rollercoaster".
Ordinarily I could agree, but the op admitted he can manipulate/lie to draw victims in, then once he has a victim who trusts them, he then uses them for his gain by making them suffer. So, could they have come here knowing that many here could either take things at face value, be naive to intent or not pick up on verbal social cues, etc? In other words, they admitted they deceived before, and they are coming to a forum where they could think many could fall for the trap. So, are they pretending a desire for help and by being somewhat transparent, but in reality that is a new game for them to see if they can reel in some who assumes they now have good intentions from some self criticism and transparency? Who knows. I assume sadistic desires remain in most cases and does not melt away any without at minimum some intensive treatment. That is a reasonable inference.
Are we supposed to be sensitive to the feelings of some person who harmed so many and who apparently does not give a diddly doo about stating sadistic desires things to an Autistic forum where nearly all could not relate and where many nay want a safe and not triggering place, a forum talking mainly of Autistic related issues? Sadism is not a topic of interest to most here. If it is, I am in the wrong place. I am here because of our children with Autism and likely wife with it. I am not here to support sadistic persons who have not even talked about Autism in any way.
As well, how were the victims of the abuses against them by the sadist helped by them likely being less judgemental, more pleasing and sensitive to that sadistic abuser? They were used and abused more from being kind, trusting and weak from what was said? There is this thing called responsibility and deception that many of us fail to miss. When you do the manipulation and crime, pay the price and do the time (turn yourself in, get charged, get investigated, appear in court, be put in jail, etc).. And when you have bullied others for enjoyment there, and feel entitled there, expect others to side with the victims and fight back. When inhumane things are done, expect human reactions back.
So if that perpetrator was/is not making amends, getting treatment, and doing time for those crimes, but just coming semi clean on a forum, and if they do not seem remorseful, it to me seems natural for any to have doubts about their full honesty and sincerity, and ability to change, and it will be natural for any outrage to occur, and for those to need to vent against that unpunished cruelty, and/or with need to show little empathy back to the abuser, with focus on the hidden real victims and wanting justice served and no new suffering to occur, as it appears from what they said insanity is not their excuse, so those who resort to such need to put their big boy and big girl pants on and take real accountability. The 'I have uncontrollable lack of empathy' is not valid reason to harm others.
None of us here are going to fix sadist thinking no matter how nice, non judgmental and probing we are; thinking that may be ingrained forever in them or for long duration from the things said and as research says. The key is to thus stop further harms from happening to others and for the harmed to heal and get any justice.. As much as I am fine that the op admits to some bad things he did and does that society would see as wrong, and as so future people can avoid that, I expect there likely was much worse things done or said, as what was said seemed to be giving just enough details for us to trust, but I am not naive there knowing things were likely even worse, and that there could even be some harmful or selfish intent for their post to members here.
We all have a right to judge anybody that has harmed an innocent another. Everybody judges, and that is how we learn to find pleasures, stay neutral and/or avoid pain. Yes we should focus on what we control, the rules in life and of the forum, but if we see sadist behaviors to occur, expect appropriate feelings and reactions back from those who believe in fairness, justice, and to rightfully express their distaste. We have feelings and are not robots. After all, the op came to a forum of those who relate to Autism, and nothing I read indicates enough core symptoms to even suggest that condition. Just because one may lack empathy and enjoys hurting others, let's not imply it is Autism causing those harms? No wonder why people are offended, as who knows if the intent could be to offend more and to get reactions they like back. In that case, they win, but so do we by stating truly how we feel, and if those stating concerns against the op causes more members to support indirectly the victims and to proceed with more caution against someone who can harm again, that is a good hing..
Too much empathy to abusers or those enabling them results in actually more abuse. We can deny it, but I should know, as I witnessed my mother and us being beaten by our father regularly. I did not repeat that cycle with my family, and I became very empathetic partly by sensing all that pain in me and all around me and wanting to be my best for myself and others.. However, I knew my dad knew right from wrong, too. and yet he never attempted to change his ways. And I saw my mother siding time and time again with our father, and yes partly out of fear of being alone, as he was not the type o hunt others down. But Mom started blaming us for their fights and abusing us, and she too needed to be held accountable there as she was supposed to put her kids first and was not deemed insane.. She put her husband first and she allowed abuse.
Enabling abusers and prioritizing or assuming them as some victim who just wants help is not the answer. My sister turned narcissistic too likely from the maltreatment she suffered too, but she was/is not legally labeled crazy either, nor would ever admit to it anyway having been a high ranking military person. Blaming your past, condition and/or others for your own adult bad actions in life or denying being an abuser is dumb. Some severe defect things could be genetic yes, but go to court then and prove insanity if that is an issue, and go get much treatment. When people do not do such, they must adhere to laws, common moral and ethical standards, or else will be judged by others for commiting harms and breaking rules. My empathy is with current victims and future victims.
Coming to this forum expecting us to show care and show understanding to someone who just out of the gate wanted to show us just some sadist side without showing ties to Autism would be weird, if that was the desire or act. If that was not the purpose for coming here, explain the purpose and stop avoiding the real issue, the fact you did harmful things for so long without apparently any consequences, and you never apparently tried to help yourself as your focus was on your pleasure . The real issue with any manipulator and abuser is their needs to please mainly themselves. So I am not going to please you.
By them pleasing themselves by hurting others, you win some, but you will lose some too. The law will catch up with you, and the victims can fight back. And those who prioritize victims, and who will try to prevent you from victimizing more, will advocate for them, while doing everything in their power to make it known to you that coming to a forum and expecting us to assist you in any way is a bit pompous for the fair to accept, when you cannot even turn yourself in to authorities for the trouble you caused and will cause further by you not even attempting in-patient treatment and by not addressing how you will better the lack of remorse for your intent to inflict pain.
Some may fall for the I come in peace and I need some relief for being a self-admitted monster' game; I will not. Sadists do not change. They may mask to draw victims in, or manage some symptoms some, but resort to their usual horrible thinking or ways. If anything, things often escalate with them thirsting for more or more extreme suffering. So the, 'I am mostly fine now. That was the past stuff' is deception, as I never heard of a sadist, psychopath or sociopath overcome many of such behavioral things without at minimum much medical intervention, and that often cannot change their any lack of empathy or remorse in their intentional acts to commit human suffering..
