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I would like some thoughts on that situation please

Rexi said:
a big lie is enough for breakup, it messes with trust, especially if his friends back him up for it. why won't they stop interfering with your relationship and just mind their own business. do you think they might be a bad influence on him? even so, that doesn't excuse his actions. might want to talk to them about what they did, theyre in with him on the lie, they lied to you too, causing you distress. might want to cut ties if they don't respond well to you communicating this or just never trust them or avoid them
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I clearly think they are in this to.. The first time when he said he went with his friend who has a company he helps with sometimes. And after I found out where he was and i was hurt and suspicious for weeks.. He showed him one of our text messages and his friend said im guilt tripping him.. Wich caused him to argue with me because his friend seems to know but never managed to have a lasting relationship.. So i think also since I moved to him he did spend more time with me than with him... Wich might caused it to..

But since the lie I even don't understand still why if he felt the need to go away for space why not say.. And the second time he went he at least did write me he hast to go to take space... I didn't ask where but I found out by talking to his family he lied to them aswell where he went. So no one knew besides me because I found the flight tickets twice.
But I don't know why he choose to see his friend in Korea twice rather than visiting his oldest friend wich he grew up with and was missing so long and used even him as excuses he was seeing him...

That's why I can't just be cool and chilled and so on because it's in my head somewhere and if he does something weird it comes out again.. I still didn't get a explanation properly why and what.. Just he wanted to go far away away from everything so he went to a foreign country to stay at his friend.. I don't really know how to trust him now honestly or be happy.. Because i clearly Ben hurt
 
Rexi said:
a big lie is enough for breakup, it messes with trust, especially if his friends back him up for it. why won't they stop interfering with your relationship and just mind their own business. do you think they might be a bad influence on him? even so, that doesn't excuse his actions. might want to talk to them about what they did, theyre in with him on the lie, they lied to you too, causing you distress. might want to cut ties if they don't respond well to you communicating this or just never trust them or avoid them
Click to expand...

I clearly think his friend is influencing him there.. He was the cause we had a argument and this bed meltdown because he convinced him I was guilt tripping him..
Its just that this lies where never really explained or why it happened so I have this huge mistrust back in my head like a wound... And it comes creating up as soon he is doing something suspicious.. I would love to know he really loves me and he is not seeing someone else... Or such... And just is with me out of convince... I really don't understand why to lie about where he went when the situation was to much.. He just could have said and i would found a solution or moved out sooner..
He said many hurtful things when on meltdown.. And i just feel like i don't know what to belive.. And even his family he told the same lie where he was at.
 
he doesn't trust you enough to tell you honestly and enough to believe you and that he knows you over his friend's opinion. He doesn't trust himself either to know if something's wrong. he thinks you're abusing him
 
Rexi said:
he doesn't trust you enough to tell you honestly and enough to believe you and that he knows you over his friend's opinion. He doesn't trust himself either to know if something's wrong. he thinks you're abusing him
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I really have no idea what is going on or what he is hiding or why he is so strange again... I just feel like there is something.. And he sees me as nagging and this and that. But i tried so hard to trust him after the first time.. And than again. Something.. I don't know what to think honestly and I'm quite sure I didn't abuse him in any way
 
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