I shall tell you for why......

[Fridgemagnetman]

Good point. Could well be. Makes plenty of sense in a tactical sort of way.

However from my own perspective I recognize that humor itself can also potentially be precarious if and when misunderstood. But then in my own case I cannot predictably process things like sarcasm either.

Never said it was a good defense mechanism
And most definitely doesn't always work!
But weeds out the easily offended!

 

[Judge]

Never said it was a good defense mechanism
And most definitely doesn't always work!
But weeds out the easily offended!

Most importantly in most instances it likely buys you time to formulate a response.

What ultimately counts is whether or not it consistently works for you.

 

[Progster]

I'm not so good at coming up with an explanation or justification when confronted, I tend to blank out and not say anything. Not good when i need to defend myself. I need a phrase like that... preferably a grammatically correct one, though.... assuming this is actually what Suzanne means, we don't know that yet.

 

[LucyPurrs]

Whether or not it's what Suzanne meant, it's clear some of you need some time to formulate an answer. Nothing wrong with that in my mind. Nothing says you have to instantly reply to a question or comment, why can't you say you need to think about it for a moment. My house mate, who's NT often just says nothing for several seconds- sometimes I'm not sure if she heard so if I ask, she'll say "I'm thinking about it!!!!! "
So why can't you do that? My bad for even asking her but we are both of an age where sometimes we don't hear XD.

 

[Judge]

It doesn't help that we exist in a world where instant gratification tends to be taken to new lows. Where so many of us are expected to respond instantly....as if we all spoke in terms of "snappy comebacks".

Agreed- it doesn't really matter if she meant this or not. What counts is that it pays to develop a strategy to delay such a dynamic to give yourself time to respond without being chastised or humiliated for it.

 

[Juliettaa]

But weeds out the easily offended!

Or weeds out the ones who don't get jokes.

I've spent loads of time scratching my head when I just don't get it, which is most of the time. In fact, my scalp hurts from scratching!!

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

Or weeds out the ones who don't get jokes.

I've spent loads of time scratching my head when I just don't get it, which is most of the time. In fact, my scalp hurts from scratching!!

.
Of course I am a zombie most of the time.
It's just when I'm "on"
And it's okay not to get it,
But what I like is it's accepted for me to do it,even if no one gets it

 

[Juliettaa]

.
Of course I am a zombie most of the time.
It's just when I'm "on"
And it's okay not to get it,
But what I like is it's accepted for me to do it,even if no one gets it

I get the gist that most people, if not all, expect and enjoy your humour even when they don't 'get it'.

That's the beauty of this place; we can just be. No pretence.

 

[LucyPurrs]

Yup and you are so forgiving when we don't get it! (and I'm relieved to know I'm not the only one who sometimes doesn't get it)

 

[Nervous Rex]

Great thread, @Suzanne.

I wholeheartedly agree. This is a good discussion. Look what you started, @Suzanne!

 

[SusanLR]

Is what I come out with more often than not when having to defend or make a statement. I have tried to not say it, but it still slips out and my hubby hates it.

I think it is a way to get my head in gear, to explain myself.

I would take it to mean " I'll tell you why..." or " I will give you the reason why."

I get chastised all the time by the guy I live with if I don't give a split second response to a question too.
"Susan, Susan, do you hear what I'm saying?"
Before I can even open my mouth to speak!

That second or so to answer seems to mean I'm not listening to most people.

 

[Suzanne]

I don't understand this, do you mean "I shall tell you why?"

Yes, but for a weird reason, I always add the: FOR and now thinking about it, I do conclude, it is a way for my brain to take its time to explain what I need to say.

Sounds strange, but that is the only conclusion I come out with and it is always to my husband!

 

[Suzanne]

NEVER to be "dogging" on you... But this is ASD at is best!
I'm lost as a duck in a hail storm (with what you are trying to say)... But I bet you can help us understand it more

This sounds like me when I first wake up... I make perfect sense to me... Too others not so much.

Well its not when I first wake up... Its most all the time, but I don't want the world to know that... and now they do... : )

PS... Thank goodness for the EDIT button I have used it 6 times to write out this short mess.

It is just something I come out with, when I feel pushed in a corner and need to defend myself.

 

[Suzanne]

If someone asks her something

She says 'I shall tell you for why' as the beginning part of her answer.

A habit,giving pause for thought.

It doesn't make Suzanne the worst person in the world. Maybe the fourth or fifth worst...


A speech habit is my take.
We're all waiting

Oh THANK YOU SO MUCH for putting into such clear language for me. You have it spot on!

 

[Suzanne]

Two people I know use the phrase,
“To be fair ...”
At the beginning of an explanation in favour of somebody else’s valiant effort but who aren’t quite correct.

It’s starting to sneak into more and more conversations as if it’s becoming an official sentence starter.

I lose track of what’s said because I’m counting the number of times “To be fair” is used.
Amusing.

Lol I also say that too: to be fair!!!!

 

[Suzanne]

I don't really understand the title of this post, nor its contents. Can you possibly clarify, @Suzanne ?

I was as confused by your response, as you are of my thread but having seen the other responses, I think it is due to the word content. I do tend to use quite a bit of "Old English".

 

[Suzanne]

MAYBE I DO GET IT???

"I will tell you for why?" or "I don't feel the need to tell you" as a response???
Am I close?

If so... yes... I get it. I don't like explaining myself sometimes, or lots of times, or anytime mostly...

I believe it is just a defense action on my part. A sense of drawing out my words, to give me time to think of my response.

 

[Suzanne]

The thing is, do you want to stop saying it? Does it irritate you?

If not and you're happy to use that phrase when initiating a response/buy time before replying - carry on

We all have our quirks. This is one of yours.

It only irritates me, because it was brought to my notice in a way that showed annoyance and so, trying to refrain from using the sentence, I get annoyed with myself, for not being able to refrain; although I am begining to start saying it and then, stop abruptly.

 

[Suzanne]

I wholeheartedly agree. This is a good discussion. Look what you started, @Suzanne!

In truth, I have spent quite a bit of the night, tossing and turning, over my thread; panicking that I have done something awful. Which is silly and I know it, but I was actually dreading coming here, to see all the: I don't understand you etc etc and so RELIEVED to find the opposite.

 

[Streetwise]

In truth, I have spent quite a bit of the night, tossing and turning, over my thread; panicking that I have done something awful. Which is silly and I know it, but I was actually dreading coming here, to see all the: I don't understand you etc etc and so RELIEVED to find the opposite.

i've realised I panic so if it's good or bad it makes me panic !for instance if I listen to the automated bank balance and its low I panic and if I hear it and it's high I panic !it's the way my mind is operating .