I shall tell you for why......

[Suzanne]

Is what I come out with more often than not when having to defend or make a statement. I have tried to not say it, but it still slips out and my hubby hates it.

I think it is a way to get my head in gear, to explain myself.

 

[Progster]

I don't understand this, do you mean "I shall tell you why?"

 

[Chance]

Is what I come out with more often than not when having to defend or make a statement. I have tried to not say it, but it still slips out and my hubby hates it.

I think it is a way to get my head in gear, to explain myself.

NEVER to be "dogging" on you... But this is ASD at is best!
I'm lost as a duck in a hail storm (with what you are trying to say)... But I bet you can help us understand it more

This sounds like me when I first wake up... I make perfect sense to me... Too others not so much.

Well its not when I first wake up... Its most all the time, but I don't want the world to know that... and now they do... : )

PS... Thank goodness for the EDIT button I have used it 6 times to write out this short mess.

 

[Bolletje]

I don't really understand the title of this post, nor its contents. Can you possibly clarify, @Suzanne ?

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

If someone asks her something

She says 'I shall tell you for why' as the beginning part of her answer.

A habit,giving pause for thought.

It doesn't make Suzanne the worst person in the world. Maybe the fourth or fifth worst...


A speech habit is my take.
We're all waiting

 

[Chance]

MAYBE I DO GET IT???

"I will tell you for why?" or "I don't feel the need to tell you" as a response???
Am I close?

If so... yes... I get it. I don't like explaining myself sometimes, or lots of times, or anytime mostly...

 

[LucyPurrs]

If someone asks her something

She says 'I shall tell you for why' as the beginning part of her answer.

A habit,giving pause for thought.

It doesn't make Suzanne the worst person in the world. Maybe the fourth or fifth worst...


A speech habit is my take.
We're all waiting

BINGO I bet. Makes perfect sense.

 

[Juliettaa]

The thing is, do you want to stop saying it? Does it irritate you?

If not and you're happy to use that phrase when initiating a response/buy time before replying - carry on

We all have our quirks. This is one of yours.

 

[Nervous Rex]

A quick google search turned up quite a few hits for "I shall tell you for why". Perhaps it's a regionalism, or perhaps you picked it up from a book.

It also appears a few times in quotes by non-native English speakers, typically someone who originally speaks Spanish or Italian. "Por que" could have been mistranslated by them into "for why".

Perhaps you adopted it from someone close to you. Perhaps the uniqueness of it, or some charm you saw in the phrase caused you to adopt it. Either way, it seemed to resonate with you.

There are quite a few phrases that I deliberately adopt because I like the way they say things. I come from a very plain-English background, but I love the backwoods phrases like "should oughta", "might could", and "fixin' to" ("I should oughta take care of that sometime." "You need that fixed? I might could do that." "I'm fixin' to do that this weekend.")

For a while, when I was searching for a word, I would say, "how you say in English?..." I thought it was a funny space-filler. But one time, someone got all wide-eyed and asked if I was from another country, so I stopped.

 

[Progster]

It also appears a few times in quotes by non-native English speakers, typically someone who originally speaks Spanish or Italian. "Por que" could have been mistranslated by them into "for why".

Aha, that might explain it. In French that is 'pourquoi' and means the same thing. @Suzanne is in France.

 

[Gracey]

It does make sense that Suzanne uses that phrase and “I shall tell you for why;”

That script gives her a fraction of a second to organise her reply.

See?

 

[Judge]

It does make sense that Suzanne uses that phrase and “I shall tell you for why;”

That script gives her a fraction of a second to organise her reply.

See?

A great response and explanation purely from an Aspie perspective. Love it.

 

[Gracey]

Two people I know use the phrase,
“To be fair ...”
At the beginning of an explanation in favour of somebody else’s valiant effort but who aren’t quite correct.

It’s starting to sneak into more and more conversations as if it’s becoming an official sentence starter.

I lose track of what’s said because I’m counting the number of times “To be fair” is used.
Amusing.

 

[Nervous Rex]

A great response and explanation purely from an Aspie perspective. Love it.

I need to start doing that more. So often, someone will ask me a question and I'll say, "Nope!" ... then think for a second and say, "Wait, I'm sorry, yes."

Or at work, someone will ask how to do something, and I'll immediately reply, "I have no idea." ... and a few second later, "Oh, that's easy. Here's how."

So, obviously, I need a stalling tactic or a progress bar.

 

[Judge]

I need to start doing that more. So often, someone will ask me a question and I'll say, "Nope!" ... then think for a second and say, "Wait, I'm sorry, yes."

Or at work, someone will ask how to do something, and I'll immediately reply, "I have no idea." ... and a few second later, "Oh, that's easy. Here's how."

So, obviously, I need a stalling tactic or a progress bar.

Makes such good sense from an Aspie perspective. Where for so many of us, communicating in real-time can at times be like walking through a minefield. Very difficult to explain to NTs.

 

[LucyPurrs]

I need to start doing that more. So often, someone will ask me a question and I'll say, "Nope!" ... then think for a second and say, "Wait, I'm sorry, yes."

Or at work, someone will ask how to do something, and I'll immediately reply, "I have no idea." ... and a few second later, "Oh, that's easy. Here's how."

So, obviously, I need a stalling tactic or a progress bar.

For you "let me think" or "let me think about that for a minute" would fly well in the NT world. And NTs say that a lot anyway. But for Suzanne, having to justify or explain something it won't work well. She could say "let me explain why" to gain some time and set someone up for her point of view.

 

[Nervous Rex]

Makes such good sense from an Aspie perspective. Where for so many of us, communicating in real-time can at times be like walking through a minefield. Very difficult to explain to NTs.

Amen to that. Anytime I speak off the cuff, and don't have time to run everything I plan to say through all my usual filters, I risk saying something regrettable.

 

[Judge]

Amen to that. Anytime I speak off the cuff, and don't have time to run everything I plan to say through all my usual filters, I risk saying something regrettable.

To me it's at the core of Autism Spectrum Disorder. That for whatever reason, communicating in real-time, face-to-face can be so daunting at times compared to other forms of communication.

Which also compels me to emphasize that how we communicate here online, is likely to be a very different prospect from how you deal with us face-to-face.

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

To me it's at the core of Autism Spectrum Disorder. That for whatever reason, communicating in real-time can be so daunting at times compared to other forms of communication.

Which also compels me to emphasize that how we communicate here online, is likely to be a very different prospect from how you deal with us face-to-face.

I wonder if that's why I make a joke first. Quick response from a defense mechanism.
Then give the sensible answer.

 

[Judge]

I wonder if that's why I make a joke first. Quick response from a defense mechanism.
Then give the sensible answer.

Good point. Could well be. Makes plenty of sense in a tactical sort of way.

However from my own perspective I recognize that humor itself can also potentially be precarious if and when misunderstood. But then in my own case I cannot predictably process things like sarcasm either.

Great thread, @Suzanne.