HI please take the time to read my letter, I guess I am Aspie (hate to be in a box and ask to a doctor), because without fake modesty everybody says to me that I am super intelligent( where my intelligence derive from an amazing amount of books read on different subjects, and life experience based on observation) and because I cannot maintain eye contact. I do not have any repetitive behavior, but I get obsessed by new topics every 2,3 month, can be chess one month, then music production another, vintage watches another one, basically it gives me a lot of endorphins to see dedicated youtube video, scientifical researches etc, and I love this feeling of learning things, I hate banality(REALLY BORING) and find people with asperger or geniuses really nice to hear instead of "less smart" people, i have a character considered super stubborn. Is this common to you as well?(first question)
But anyway I am asking you some question about eye contact:
(second question `IMPORTANT`) how do you overcome the fear of eye contact? I need a method PROVEN PROOF to speak to the other in the eyes without getting emotionally anxious, my anxiety derives from the fact that I can understand really good what the other person is thinking about me, I can perceive all the micro variations if they are lying to me, if they are comfortable and so I find really difficult that I am in my train of thought speaking about some complex topic and then I look them in the face and I understand if they agree with me or not, if they do not agree(I repeat I can read this really accurate) this hurts me and i lose focus on what I am saying, I CAN FORCE MY SELF BUT HURTS, (third question) is this called autism to be sensitive and so not be able to multitask a complex speech with continuous interruptions I get from the facial feedback of others? Also often I have self conscious thoughts when i speak with the others, so i need every time to remember my self that need to relax my facial muscle to not appear aggressive, i guess this is the main issue regardless of I am on the spectrum or not, this condition worsened since i do seriously meditation(last 20 years).
(fourth question) if I am sexually aroused or feel a crush for a girl(I had a lot of women, usually they find me really sexy and fascinating because of my thoughts/personality), I lose completely any problem in looking in the eyes of the other, and the ipersensitivity play in my favor because i try a really nice feeling
(fifth question) if I am angry I do not have any problem in looking the others in the eyes (even because I am aware that if i am hungry i can keep contracted my facial expressions without thinking how i appear),I am even a professional public speaker, with great feedback, found really easy to speak to audiences, than to one person
Please chip whatever contribution if you can, it would mean a lot to my frustration, thank you for your patience
But anyway I am asking you some question about eye contact:
(second question `IMPORTANT`) how do you overcome the fear of eye contact? I need a method PROVEN PROOF to speak to the other in the eyes without getting emotionally anxious, my anxiety derives from the fact that I can understand really good what the other person is thinking about me, I can perceive all the micro variations if they are lying to me, if they are comfortable and so I find really difficult that I am in my train of thought speaking about some complex topic and then I look them in the face and I understand if they agree with me or not, if they do not agree(I repeat I can read this really accurate) this hurts me and i lose focus on what I am saying, I CAN FORCE MY SELF BUT HURTS, (third question) is this called autism to be sensitive and so not be able to multitask a complex speech with continuous interruptions I get from the facial feedback of others? Also often I have self conscious thoughts when i speak with the others, so i need every time to remember my self that need to relax my facial muscle to not appear aggressive, i guess this is the main issue regardless of I am on the spectrum or not, this condition worsened since i do seriously meditation(last 20 years).
(fourth question) if I am sexually aroused or feel a crush for a girl(I had a lot of women, usually they find me really sexy and fascinating because of my thoughts/personality), I lose completely any problem in looking in the eyes of the other, and the ipersensitivity play in my favor because i try a really nice feeling
(fifth question) if I am angry I do not have any problem in looking the others in the eyes (even because I am aware that if i am hungry i can keep contracted my facial expressions without thinking how i appear),I am even a professional public speaker, with great feedback, found really easy to speak to audiences, than to one person
Please chip whatever contribution if you can, it would mean a lot to my frustration, thank you for your patience
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