I have mild Aspergers. Recently, I have taken on the roll of trying to organise social events with other aspies, at an Aspergers support group that I attend.
So far, the attendance of the events have been dismal, with usually only 3 or 4 people coming to the event. When I message the group members most people don't respond.
As a person who is quite shy and social anxious, this lack of response or reciprocation is quite disheartening!
Anyway, I arranged a day trip this weekend to a major city, two other guys said they'd go. One couldn't get his train tickets booked, but seemed up for it. However, he's went on to radio silence from Monday.
I have messaged him on two separate occasions, after Monday trying to find out if he is still coming. Most recently today, where I offered to book his tickets. He read the messages, but did not respond. He also did not attend our social group this week, which I thought was odd.
The other guy is coming, we both booked our tickets yesterday. Earlier he contacted me to complain about the other guy dropping out, so he's irritated also.
Anyway, i'm not sure how to handle this other than to ignore his lack of response and turn up, wait a few minutes and leave if he doesn't arrive? I'm feeling a tad disrespected though - why can't this guy just summon up and say 'bla bla, i'm not coming because ...', you know? I would feel much better with this. Not to mention the issues of both of us having to spend £40 on train tickets for nothing?
I am also thinking of cancelling the whole day trip, and just having a lazy day. The guy who is coming doesn't participate in conversation, he just answers my question and that's it. I have no dislike towards this guy, but I can see it becoming awkward very quickly.
I don't want to hurt his feelings by cancelling, but I have a high amount of anxiety over this event! I also feel kind of odd going into a restaurant with him (we had planned to go out for lunch and dinner) - I don't want people to think i'm gay!!
I really struggle to communicate with other people with Aspergers, there are huge issues with reciprocation and getting a good response! I don't know how to deal with this!
So far, the attendance of the events have been dismal, with usually only 3 or 4 people coming to the event. When I message the group members most people don't respond.
As a person who is quite shy and social anxious, this lack of response or reciprocation is quite disheartening!
Anyway, I arranged a day trip this weekend to a major city, two other guys said they'd go. One couldn't get his train tickets booked, but seemed up for it. However, he's went on to radio silence from Monday.
I have messaged him on two separate occasions, after Monday trying to find out if he is still coming. Most recently today, where I offered to book his tickets. He read the messages, but did not respond. He also did not attend our social group this week, which I thought was odd.
The other guy is coming, we both booked our tickets yesterday. Earlier he contacted me to complain about the other guy dropping out, so he's irritated also.
Anyway, i'm not sure how to handle this other than to ignore his lack of response and turn up, wait a few minutes and leave if he doesn't arrive? I'm feeling a tad disrespected though - why can't this guy just summon up and say 'bla bla, i'm not coming because ...', you know? I would feel much better with this. Not to mention the issues of both of us having to spend £40 on train tickets for nothing?
I am also thinking of cancelling the whole day trip, and just having a lazy day. The guy who is coming doesn't participate in conversation, he just answers my question and that's it. I have no dislike towards this guy, but I can see it becoming awkward very quickly.
I don't want to hurt his feelings by cancelling, but I have a high amount of anxiety over this event! I also feel kind of odd going into a restaurant with him (we had planned to go out for lunch and dinner) - I don't want people to think i'm gay!!
I really struggle to communicate with other people with Aspergers, there are huge issues with reciprocation and getting a good response! I don't know how to deal with this!
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