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Did you self diagnose late in life?

Suzette

Suzette

Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
I am curious about the experiences of older adults that self diagnosed ASD in middle age or older.
Why is this diagnosis imporant for you?
Did you disclose your discovery to family or friends? How did they react ?
Are your childhood memories or ancedotal stories by family part of your diagnostic process?
Have you used any online ASD screening tools like the AQ Quiz?
What, if anything has changed in your life as a result of this diagnosis?
Did your discovery change how you think about past events?
Does your discovery change how you think about your future?
Are you likely to pursue a professional assessment? Why or why not?
 
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I I figuresed it out in my mid fifties. told my brother and sister they may also be on the spectrum none of use really care explains our behavior does not really effect us. All of us retired or close to or had successful careers. told my best friend he may also be on the spectrum yesterday he agreed.
 
I self-diagnosed in my late 40s. It was part of a journey for me. I took every free online autism test available including a few that cost a small amount of money and all of them said I was well into/very high into the ASD category. I joined an autism related forum and continued to learn as much as I could about autism. I also felt at home communicating with other self-diagnosed and professionally diagnosed people.

I told my wife about my findings and told her I thought I might be or even likely was autistic. I did not tell her "I'm autistic" or say that I had autism. I also did not at that point tell anyone else other than a sibling who dismissed the notion.

I wanted a formal assessment as part of my own personal journey. If the assessment determined that was not autistic, it wouldn't have changed who I was. However, I was diagnosed as autistic.

Hopefully friends, family, etc would respect someone telling them that they suspect they're autistic, or they think it's likely they're autistic. I would discourage anyone self-diagnosed to tell others declaratively that they are autistic.
 
(maybe seven years ago)

I was walking through a local flea market, spotted a friend, and he just randomly said he thought I might be Asperger's... "Okay", he is a trustworthy friend just for the record

I went home and looked it up... "Maybe"

Then when I almost started dating someone, the topic somehow came up, at which point I did some online tests which possibly confirmed a few conclusions, that was (three?) years ago

I never formally diagnosed largely because of the cost, because I was working at the time, and I would likely have to pay for it

When I became unemployed last year, I ended up connecting with a local gov't agency that tested me as ASD-1, the highest functioning Autism, which is also often called Asperger's...

And I'm in my late 40's just for reference...
 
Why is this diagnosis important for you? Better understanding of self, and it explains misunderstandings in how others perceive my actions/inactions/quirks.
Did you disclose your discovery to family or friends? Yes How did the react ? I did a post on that topic. If I had it to do over, I might wait till later, or not disclose.
Are your childhood memories or ancedotal stories by family part of your diagnostic process? Yes recall of childhood and my responses to those around me, and them to my quirks were useful.
Have you used any online ASD screening tools like the AQ Quiz? Yes, but those really are not for women. Therefore if you are ASD, you may score as borderline etc when taking that type of quiz.
What, if anything has changed in your life as a result of this diagnosis? Sure, I realize there are others such as myself and it's a rather inclusive feeling.
Did your discovery change how you think about past events? Yes, I realized that without such information, and potential coaching, that there was nothing I could have done differently in childhood. That question that was always there "How could I have responded differently to find greater acceptance and avoid appearing different". Now it is behind me.
Does your discovery change how you think about your future? I may more easily seek out others on the spectrum. I expect more from others now as a result. Specifically those who claim to like or love me, yet would like me to change to accommodate them. Connections will have to offer a two way accommodation from here on in. I have turned from what is different (and maybe wrong) about me and my actions, to accepting who I am as simply uniquely wired.
Are you likely to pursue a professional assessment? Why or why not? Well now that I have unwittingly disclosed, action may be beneficial. Diagnosis may offer further validation. What I am stating for my self diagnosis if confirmed. may carry weight for my spouse. Then I could take that one step further to benefit both of us, with the potential benefits of a professional to explain to my spouse that this diagnosis is not something to be used as an 'excuse' by him or I, but rather we each share in the responsibility to understand, support and accept each other.
 
I was in my 40's when I first read about aspergers and received my diagnosis a couple of year's ago.

Residing in France, I heard that it was almost impossible for getting a diagnosis and especially for a female and an adult one at that, but from the moment, my husband asked my psychiatrist for a referral, to a couple of month's later, I recieved the diagnosis, it was a miracle to me and feel sure it was my God, Jehovah, who helped me.

I saw a neuro therapist twice and was highly amused when I took the same test as I did on here and after several other tests, she said that I scored a typical aspie score and then, was referred to an expert in autism and she was surprised with how quick that came about, because generally, it takes up to a year and yet, I got an appointment the next week.

Also saw him twice and the first time, he said that as far as he was concerned I have aspergers, but for some reason, wanted me back for another test and that confirmed my diagnosis.

It has been so worth it for me. I am recognised by the health authorites here and get a lot of understanding from my spiritual family. I know longer feel the need to justify my reasons for why I believe I have aspergers. Before, I would get: if you are, then I am too. Or: oh, we all have a bit of autism in us etc. But now, nothing, because of that confirmation.

Neurotypicals thive with formal diagnosises and to be able to function in their world, it is best to adapt where we can lol
 
Yeshuasdaughter, I totally relate to your school trouble. I got sent to the school guidence counselor often for behavioral issues. But I was "bright" so my academic troubles were thought to be because I wasn't applying myself, lazy etc. I was hyperlexic and most of my test scores were in the 95-98 percentile. So, not a savant, just bright enough to become invisible.

I am still not entirely certain that I am on the spectrum but I strongly suspect so. Many of my memories are intertwined with memories of a rough childhood so isolating the relevant information is not easy. Many of my chilhood experiences, like my brother bullying me, may have been exacerbated by ND responses. That is harder to asceertain but probable.

Still, my very early childhood does offer clues. As mentioned I was hyperlexic, I had many stims including hair chewing/ twirling, nail biting, skin picking, pencil chewing, paper eating, etc. I wet the bed until I was about 8 or 9. And then there was the shyness...

I do want to get a professional diagnosis as it would help solve the mystrey of me. But finances are a problem and we do not have insurence so....
My husband is rather pragmatic, he sees an official diagnosis as only important to a career. But to me it is vindication, an acknowledgement that I am normal, not crazy. Validation.
 
Suzette said:
Yeshuasdaughter, I totally relate to your school trouble. I got sent to the school guidence counselor often for behavioral issues. But I was "bright" so my academic troubles were thought to be because I wasn't applying myself, lazy etc. I was hyperlexic and most of my test scores were in the 95-98 percentile. So, not a savant, just bright enough to become invisible.

I am still not entirely certain that I am on the spectrum but I strongly suspect so. Many of my memories are intertwined with memories of a rough childhood so isolating the relevant information is not easy. Many of my chilhood experiences, like my brother bullying me, may have been exacerbated by ND responses. That is harder to asceertain but probable.

Still, my very early childhood does offer clues. As mentioned I was hyperlexic, I had many stims including hair chewing/ twirling, nail biting, skin picking, pencil chewing, paper eating, etc. I wet the bed until I was about 8 or 9. And then there was the shyness...

I do want to get a professional diagnosis as it would help solve the mystrey of me. But finances are a problem and we do not have insurence so....
My husband is rather pragmatic, he sees an official diagnosis as only important to a career. But to me it is vindication, an acknowledgement that I am normal, not crazy. Validation.
Click to expand...
Try contacting universities ?if they have a psychology department they sometimes do diagnosis for free as it will be training future psychologists
 
Suzette said:
I am curious about the experiences of older adults that self diagnosed ASD in middle age or older.
Why is this diagnosis imporant for you?
Did you disclose your discovery to family or friends? How did they react ?
Are your childhood memories or ancedotal stories by family part of your diagnostic process?
Have you used any online ASD screening tools like the AQ Quiz?
What, if anything has changed in your life as a result of this diagnosis?
Did your discovery change how you think about past events?
Does your discovery change how you think about your future?
Are you likely to pursue a professional assessment? Why or why not?
Click to expand...
Mine's quite different, because I'm in a country that has state healthcare, so you'll wait a long ,long time to be seen by a therapist, oldest man in my country was 83 ,if you think about it there are some people who were never diagnosed !,so that's 100 years and over, I was just desperate for help, so I thought autism!, that was immediately shot down by a GP, who jumped on a previous diagnosis!, then 5 years later I was actually given a diagnosis, if you can make eye contact with somebody it could be pdd-nos ,that by some! people is the very mildest form of autism.
 
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Thank you for the suggestion Streetwise. I haven't given up.

At 54 I have had a long, long time to work on self help therapy to try to understand and overcome my differences. If being able to make eye contact, however breif, is a sign of my sucess then I welcome it.

The point of professional diagnosis of course is to certify an opinion, hopefully, one based on science rather than subjective stereotype. The trick is in finding a diagnostician who is more interested in humanity than their collegues opinions. It is a big ask!
 
I have no interest or even more important no confidence in the soft sciences, my younger brother took an undergraduate degree in psychology. He spent the last forty years working as a millwright, only used it when he became vice-president of the union.
 
I have a friend who received a professional assessment which has her on that ASD spectrum. We have a lot in common. I have always known I am gifted with dyslexia. That is obvious and easy to accept. However many of the other issues with being on the spectrum I find I have just adjusted to.

In my case, a professional diagnosis would not have any value to me. I am very very different from others. This shows up mostly in my thinking. My friend and I are convinced those who are autistic Think Differently than others. I wish we did more research on that aspect of this.

John
 
Suzette said:
Thank you for the suggestion Streetwise. I haven't given up.

At 54 I have had a long, long time to work on self help therapy to try to understand and overcome my differences. If being able to make eye contact, however breif, is a sign of my sucess then I welcome it.

The point of professional diagnosis of course is to certify an opinion, hopefully, one based on science rather than subjective stereotype. The trick is in finding a diagnostician who is more interested in humanity than their collegues opinions. It is a big ask!
Click to expand...
But that is a luxury! being able to choose a diagnostician! The reason for diagnosis is if you get an expert in autism that you can make much more informed choices, autism can look like lack of socialisation or brain damage in some people, that's why an expert is really needed!
 
I did say "finding" not "choosing" Streetwise. Though if one has money enough one can do anything.

There are many valuble reasons one might choose a professional assessment. For me, the retiree, understanding the root cause of my life's chaos would be an invaluable tool in my therapy. After all, my life is only half over, I have many decades to live yet. There are plenty of informed choices yet to make!
 
Ronald Zeeman said:
I have no interest or even more important no confidence in the soft sciences, my younger brother took an undergraduate degree in psychology. He spent the last forty years working as a millwright, only used it when he became vice-president of the union.
Click to expand...

My husband has degrees in Earth Sciences, Astrophysics and some other degree I can't recall. His dream was to be a highschool teacher and he could not get a job teaching. Ultimately he got a job, and was very sucsessful in, software engineering. Sometimes our talents do not align with our desires.
 
ITS all about playing your cards right, know your skill set and leverage it. Not a big believer in luck fail to plan plan to fail is my motto.
 
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