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Depressed About Still Being a Virgin

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Rexi said:
if someone judges ppl for their virginity you can tell how superficial they are and how much their opinions really matter or are thought of. They are likely weak issue full bullies which have not found a better way to feel better about themselves but to pick on superficial things and shame people so they seem better to fools who buy into such silly things.
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there is this new show on Netflix about sex education that says about sex being on every teen's mind:it's on the minds of every teen in general !
 
There's a documentary series on Netflix about sex and romance in other countries. Some places consist of mostly virgins.
 
Fino said:
There's no reason to even have a term that means one has never had sex.
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and you end up getting relentlessly teased or shamed for it (i was 14 or 15 when it happened,especially if you're an aspie becuase of how severely awkward you appear to girls & women your age upon eye-contact,seeing girls & women your age who remember you from school the same way guys from that particular school who also live in the same neighborhood as you & they probably end up asking you the question:are you still a virgin ?
 
jared mills said:
and you end up getting relentlessly teased or shamed for it (i was 14 or 15 when it happened,especially if you're an aspie becuase of how severely awkward you appear to girls & women your age upon eye-contact,seeing girls & women your age who remember you from school the same way guys from that particular school who also live in the same neighborhood as you & they probably end up asking you the question:are you still a virgin ?
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If the people doing it were also 14 or 15, they were probably virgins too. It's not normal to lose it when you're fourteen or fifteen. I've never heard of someone being made fun of for that. It seems so strange to me. Sorry about that. :oops:
 
Fino said:
If the people doing it were also 14 or 15, they were probably virgins too. It's not normal to lose it when you're fourteen or fifteen. I've never heard of someone being made fun of for that. It seems so strange to me. Sorry about that. :oops:
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Next generations will shame ppl for not getting pregnant at 11 y o?!
 
Mathophobe said:
I'm twenty-two and I've never had sex. Still being a virgin is a frequent source of distress for me. Sometimes I get so depressed over it that I can't function, which is especially problematic since I'm a college student. It makes me feel like such a beta loser. I've been told not to give the virgin label so much weight, but that's hard to do when you're a guy. I've also been told there's nothing wrong with saving your virginity for the right woman, but I'm neither single nor a virgin by choice, which technically makes me an incel. That's another thing: I don't want to be an incel. I hate the incel community; it's a cesspool of misogyny, self-entitlement, and psychopathy in general. I'm afraid I'll eventually wind up falling under the influence of the incel hive mind. The shame of it all is getting too much for me to bear....
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I’m attracted to intellect, the rest comes afterwards. Focus on you’re strengths; that’s what will get the girl/experience. The social aspect is difficult but easier in a topic specific social group. My dog, career and love of coffee help people start and usually lead the conversations.
 
I thought the point of this thread was to deal with the emotional negativity
due to a perceived inferiority, not to give advice on "how to get laid".
 
tree said:
I thought the point of this thread was to deal with the emotional negativity
due to a perceived inferiority, not to give advice on "how to get laid".
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That may have been a topic of discussion, but I don't see how the OP restricts the topic to that alone.
 
It's not that it "may have been a topic of discussion"
it is the stated topic, by title of the thread.

Some people have taken that to mean the OP *needs*
advice on how to entice people to have sex with him.

Other people have focused on the silliness of the idea
that having sex makes a person better somehow.
 
The topic of the title certainly doesn't state that the thread is about "the emotional negativity due to a perceived inferiority." That would be an interpretation of it.

He's depressed because he's a virgin. One possible solution is to not be a virgin.

But it seems like your second two paragraphs there actually agree that the topic is open to interpretation so maybe we're just agreeing with each other here! :)
 
"...maybe we're just agreeing with each other here! :)"

I don't think so.
 
Well, in that case I honestly don't see from where you get your rigid view of the topic. Here's a quote from the OP that would logically result in advice on "how to get laid".

Mathophobe said:
but I'm neither single nor a virgin by choice, which technically makes me an incel. That's another thing: I don't want to be an incel.
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The OP was depressed.
The depression is based on the idea that in order to be valuable, a person must/should/ought to
be having sex.

To say that the solution is to have sex, thus removing the supposedly dreadful stigma, is
reinforcing that same negative concept.
 
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