crying in front of managers

[bchamp]

Alright, so things have been going pretty well for the most part. Although recently I've been really uncomfortable about a certain supervisor and had almost a break down of just frustration in front of some managers at work. I work at a grocery store as a cashier. As I went to take my break, the moment my manager asked to talk to me I started tearing up right away.

Today, I kind of knew I was going to be pulled up and talked to with an assistant manager, and I was. I'm glad my front end manager was with me, she's super sweet and actually treats us really well... Makes it more comfortable is all. But even though I felt prepared, the moment I tried to say anything.. I started crying. I felt so pathetic in doing so, I wanted to stop, I thought I could but my body would not let me.

They think highly of me, I love my managers, and my job. They do think highly of me, and lots of positive comments from them otherwise.. Which I am very appreciative for. I'm just trying to get over this dumb feeling of guilt for crying, or just to avoid crying if possible. It's normal... I know... but.. It just doesn't feel right for something like this at work. I take things to close to heart.

 

[Suzanne]

Although crying is normal way to release pent up emotions, I do get you, because I saw a psychiatrist for the first time, last week and as soon as my past was mentioned, I could not stop my eyes from swimming and I felt embarrassed and excused myself. It was worse, because the therapist is a man and my husband was there, but happily, when I started to get overwhelmed again, the therapist did not reach over for a tissue and in fact, I searched the room and found none, which relieved me no end, which, in itself is weird, since I had grabbed a piece of paper from the toilet.

I think related to tissues: it is an expectation that the person is going to cry and I want to defy that.

Now, as for your situation; the fact that you KNOW they think highly of you, it is quite possible that they find you endearing, because depending on your overall aura, you could come across as adorable by the women there.

I do compare our sexes here, because it is a reality. A female is seen as normal to take things close to the heart, but guys are seen as being the strong ones and thus, when the opposite takes over, it is confusing to all.

I would go by the fact that they like your work and if you can, try to put a bit of humor into your crying; here I go again; grab a bunch of tissues will you?

 

[Streetwise]

Alright, so things have been going pretty well for the most part. Although recently I've been really uncomfortable about a certain supervisor and had almost a break down of just frustration in front of some managers at work. I work at a grocery store as a cashier. As I went to take my break, the moment my manager asked to talk to me I started tearing up right away.

Today, I kind of knew I was going to be pulled up and talked to with an assistant manager, and I was. I'm glad my front end manager was with me, she's super sweet and actually treats us really well... Makes it more comfortable is all. But even though I felt prepared, the moment I tried to say anything.. I started crying. I felt so pathetic in doing so, I wanted to stop, I thought I could but my body would not let me.

They think highly of me, I love my managers, and my job. They do think highly of me, and lots of positive comments from them otherwise.. Which I am very appreciative for. I'm just trying to get over this dumb feeling of guilt for crying, or just to avoid crying if possible. It's normal... I know... but.. It just doesn't feel right for something like this at work. I take things to close to heart.

it's anxiety you will probably come to a point where you're comfortable with anxiety .

 

[pjcnet]

Often people hold in crying, especially men because for some reason we are often still told that men should never do it because it's not the manly thing to do, but it is a natural release that does actually make people feel better.

I have noticed that attitudes towards crying, especially with men have changed since I was younger and like many changes it's caused by or at least accelerated by the media, this particular change is in my opinion a good thing however. In recent years more men have been seen openly crying on camera, I've noticed that men are seen crying a lot more in movies and dramas too, even men that are portrayed as tough, and instead of the man being told to stop because men should never cry it's become a lot more accepted. In the UK Paul Gascoigne (AKA. Gazza) changed some people's views on men crying at a time when it was a lot less accepted than today, he was a very famous England international football player (football is known as Soccer in the USA). Gazza was in his prime in the late 1980s and throughout the 1990s when he became especially famous for crying live on television, many people thought it as a bit weird at first and some people even laughed at him, in fact I even saw joke cartoons taking the p**s out of him for it, but it became a lot more accepted after a while. He also showed people that crying isn't necessarily just for when you're upset, it can also be used to release various strong emotions.

Paul Gazcoigne showed people that it was okay for men to openly cry at a time when it was less accepted.

Here's another short video about men crying:

 

[Judge]

Depends on who is surrounding you at work. That it may well come down to individual personalities, apart from an office environment or even corporate culture.

That if you are surrounded by predatory and competitive mindsets, crying in public let alone in front of your manager could overtly be to your own detriment. Saw it happen once to one of my coworkers who became overwhelmed by the amount of work he had to be processed. Very sad.

He ended up opting for early retirement. One of the persons I worked with for many years only to conclude much later that he was likely on the spectrum as was I.

 

[OkRad]

Julius Caesar cried when he saw the head of Pompey. Jesus cried. Augustus cried. Alexander the Great cried. Many commanders in the Peloponnesian War cried.......If these men, the most "manly men" our world has ever known where able to cry in public....WHAT HAPPENED? Why can't men cry now?

 

[bchamp]

Although crying is normal way to release pent up emotions, I do get you, because I saw a psychiatrist for the first time, last week and as soon as my past was mentioned, I could not stop my eyes from swimming and I felt embarrassed and excused myself. It was worse, because the therapist is a man and my husband was there, but happily, when I started to get overwhelmed again, the therapist did not reach over for a tissue and in fact, I searched the room and found none, which relieved me no end, which, in itself is weird, since I had grabbed a piece of paper from the toilet.

I think related to tissues: it is an expectation that the person is going to cry and I want to defy that.

Now, as for your situation; the fact that you KNOW they think highly of you, it is quite possible that they find you endearing, because depending on your overall aura, you could come across as adorable by the women there.

I do compare our sexes here, because it is a reality. A female is seen as normal to take things close to the heart, but guys are seen as being the strong ones and thus, when the opposite takes over, it is confusing to all.

I would go by the fact that they like your work and if you can, try to put a bit of humor into your crying; here I go again; grab a bunch of tissues will you?

I do like to think they think of me as adorable, I think it fits my personality, and looks together haha. But seriously, I take a lot of things close to heart, and I've been told to not take things personally. It's almost impossible not to though. This is the most I cried in the past 2 years probably, if not more. I've only cried once during a therapist visit, even though I could spill my deepest darkest regrets, and secrets without a budge in emotion.

But a simple confrontation about how I did something at work, is just a complete and utter shutdown for me. I don't know if there will be anything to stop it, but I just want to talk about it.. Is all. I felt a lot better today after letting a lot out.

 

[Judge]

Julius Caesar cried when he saw the head of Pompey. Jesus cried. Augustus cried. Alexander the Great cried. Many commanders in the Peloponnesian War cried.......If these men, the most "manly men" our world has ever known where able to cry in public....WHAT HAPPENED? Why can't men cry now?

I suspect they probably ran out of tears with the onslaught of the Dark Ages. I'm guessing Attila the Hun probably wasn't the crying sort either. Strange time, when civilization literally "de-evolved".

 

[Progster]

I don't understand why there is such a taboo about people, especially men, crying in public. Feeling and showing emotions just makes you human, it doesn't make you weak.

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

Julius Caesar cried when he saw the head of Pompey. Jesus cried. Augustus cried. Alexander the Great cried. Many commanders in the Peloponnesian War cried.......If these men, the most "manly men" our world has ever known where able to cry in public....WHAT HAPPENED? Why can't men cry now?

Yeh but imagine if they worked in Lowes....

Jesus - a blubbering wreck. Yes the fish are out the back, they should be here soon. Ah man, Judas is never this long normally...

 

[OkRad]

Working at Lowe's would preclude tears? Ummm......going in there make me want to pass right out!!!

 

[OkRad]

I suspect they probably ran out of tears with the onslaught of the Dark Ages. I'm guessing Attila the Hun probably wasn't the crying sort either. Strange time, when civilization literally "de-evolved".

That actually is a good point. So much trauma, they were getting just worn out!