Mister Anonymity
Well-Known Member
Hi,
I've been victim to my own rage. I've been bullied and abused my whole life by the police and the justice system, as well as other people who make it their mission to mistreat me. This was all in the past when I was younger. Nowadays, I will occasionally receive a visit from the police because I get into an argument with my family over the past. What's wrong with me? A month or so, I will be fine. A day later, I will get into a rage. I will talk to myself, mumbling to myself cursing myself or other people in my turbulent past. Sometimes, I fall into a rage where my skin starts to course with so much heat and anger that I just lose it. I constantly think about the past, and I get angry. Sometimes, I lose it after months or weeks. I'm afraid that the next time I lose it, the police will come to my apartment and try to tackle me to the ground and taser me or shoot me to death.
What's wrong with me? How do I let go of the past or lose the anger? Help me. Do any of you experience the same ordeal? Do autistic people normally experience the same thing as me or am I alone?
I've been victim to my own rage. I've been bullied and abused my whole life by the police and the justice system, as well as other people who make it their mission to mistreat me. This was all in the past when I was younger. Nowadays, I will occasionally receive a visit from the police because I get into an argument with my family over the past. What's wrong with me? A month or so, I will be fine. A day later, I will get into a rage. I will talk to myself, mumbling to myself cursing myself or other people in my turbulent past. Sometimes, I fall into a rage where my skin starts to course with so much heat and anger that I just lose it. I constantly think about the past, and I get angry. Sometimes, I lose it after months or weeks. I'm afraid that the next time I lose it, the police will come to my apartment and try to tackle me to the ground and taser me or shoot me to death.
What's wrong with me? How do I let go of the past or lose the anger? Help me. Do any of you experience the same ordeal? Do autistic people normally experience the same thing as me or am I alone?