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Are there different levels of Asperger Syndrome and High-Functioning Autism?

For one,
I don't agree that guys are necessarily held to any higher standard or have it insanely more difficult. If anything, in that regard to standards-if you want to generalize- I think it just depends on which standards you mean. For looks, I would suggest women tend to focus less on looks, to be fair, in comparison to the average man. The bad news I think is that people focus on looks more than they will let on in general. The good news is, that individual preferences with looks vary quite a bit and if that's your worry- you're likely to fit in with someone. Some people, although they may prefer a good looking person, don't place it in a realistic criteria of judgement and would prefer someone who fit others (personality, money, what have you).

But beyond that- I think it's ridiculous to group people so black and white like that. While, biologically, there are a handful of things that are pretty much cross cultural/cross all personalities, the details beyond that vary immensely.
 
I think for most men, the level of their standards can change daily.
I have lost the game of love more than anyone should and we all can agree on how that feels. However, I have learned that overthinking tends to overcomplicate a simple problem. I learned this by repeatedly stumbling into relationships on accident. Usually when my self-confidence was low and I was just seeking a friend.

Then It hit me. Maybe, it's not my job to choose my partner and more closer to my partner choosing me. By being open about who I am and the burden I carry, while being an exceptional human being and leaving myself emotionally open to those who I might be compatible with. With bait like that, ya gotta catch a fish someday.
 
popculturegeeknerd06 said:
what you disagree? why is that? you think men have higher standards, are more picky than women are?
Click to expand...

I think that comparing men to women isn't the most constructive use of energy. We are all the same species, after all. We are more alike than we are different. Consider trying to see the ways in which women and men are the same, rather than different. Then you might recognize women who are more like you, who might like you for who you are. If you are looking for the negative, you will always find it.
 
Basically, it is okay for girls to get validation from guys but not the other way around. We guys have to find ways to be comfortable, content, and be in love with our own life, we have to get our validation from life, and have things we are up to in our life be validating us. Success with women, girls and success in life are similiar. Just as girls, women won't go out of their way to bring guys dating, relationship, love success, or sexual success, life does not go out if it's way to bringing anyone life success. Just as a guy's love life, dating and relationship life is his chore, burden, responsibility, to make it the way he wants it, a person's life as a whole is their responsibility to make it the way they want it. If we guys want to be successful with girls, women, it makes sense for us to have long-term goals for our lives that inspire us and that we are moving toward, no matter how slowly. If we guys do this, we'll get our validation from life rather than girls, women.
For example, let's say there is a guy who is a Video-Game Designer for a Large Company, it was easy for him to allow his life to get into a rut. Day after Day he'd go to work, design, program, come home, watch TV, and go to Bed. He had no goals, no direction. He became passive with his life and, not surprisingly, with women, girls. He blamed his company for his lack of employment of his job, and blamed women for his lack of a love, relationship, dating, sex life. His future looked like it would be just his past. He looked to women for validation in his life, because he couldn't find it anywhere else, and when they didn't validate him, he became depressed. Thus the cycle got worse: The more depressed he became, the more he wanted women to make him feel validated, and predictably, the less attractive he became. The less attractive he became, the fewer women validated him and the more depresed he got.
This was the state he was in when he came into when he was seeking advice, complaining about his lack of success with girls, women. The advice he was given was that he has to set goals for his life. He was told he had to go to a local bookstore and get a book on goal-setting, and got him to really look at what he wanted his life to be like in 10 years, five years, one year. He also was told to write down goals that inspired him, and to put them into his date book where he'd see them often. As he began to get excited about what was possible for him in his life, the cycle began to break apart. He started getting his validation from his life, rather than girls, women.
This made him more attractive to women. Rather than wanting to have a girlfriend so he could have a life, he began having a life that validated him, whether girls, women were in it or not. Naturally, women, girls, were intrigued by his passion for his life, and wanted to be a part of it. He also had to make more male friends, guys have to be extroverts, if they have little or no friends, they are screwed, if a girl is that way, introverted, she won't be screwed.
Because his male friendships were able to validate him without putting down his sexuality or showing him that he was undesirable. He found he could get a kind of support from men, guys, he could never get from women he desired who insisted on being just "friends". This validated him and made women's, girl's reactions to his approach less disturbing.
Women, girls are attracted to guys, men who have passion and fire for their lives. They aren't any more interested in prodiving guys, men, the validation for their lives than you are for theirs(that I disagree with, most guys, men, don't care, we are proud to make women, girls feel happy). When a guy, man has goals, male friends, and a life that inspires him, he'll be validated by what he is up to, and women, girls will want to be a part of his life.
If a guy's life is lonely and meaningless, that makes a guy look desperate, needy, clingy, insecure. A guy has to have something he is into, that gives his life meaning, above and beyond dating, relationships, love, sex. If a guy is trying to get meaning for his life out of interactions with girls, women, they will always notice it and reject him instantly, be repulsed by it. Guys too, won't respect that guy.
I understand, already know why girls, women are attracted to rich guys, because subconsciously, women, girls, want a provider for her and her potentially future kids, i don't blame them for that, but girls, women, are attracted to guys, men who are successful in life and many of these guys, men, are not rich themselves, don't have money.
Here it is, girls, women, are attracted to, like successful guys. It is true they are attracted to money but that is not the whole story. They are attracted to guys who are passionate about their lives and have fire and drive. Some of these guys have money, some of them don't. Money is less important than being a dynamic guy, man, tackling his life head-on. We've all seen the garage-band guitarists who are able to get dates and girlfriends, hook-ups, sex easily, eventhough they never play anywhere except but in local bars. Their passion for something in their lives makes both these kinds of guys, the guys with money and the guitarists, more attractive to girls, women.
Along with passion, women, girls are very attracted to guys who have deep social connections. In essense, girls are attracted to guys who have social-status, which means a guy has plenty of friends, both guys and girls, is very outgoing, is frequently participating in social activities and is involved in several different social-circles.
See all the work we guys have to do?

Girls, Women, don't have to do this.
 
popculturegeeknerd06 said:
Basically, it is okay for girls to get validation from guys but not the other way around. We guys have to find ways to be comfortable, content, and be in love with our own life, we have to get our validation from life, and have things we are up to in our life be validating us. Success with women, girls and success in life are similiar. Just as girls, women won't go out of their way to bring guys dating, relationship, love success, or sexual success, life does not go out if it's way to bringing anyone life success. Just as a guy's love life, dating and relationship life is his chore, burden, responsibility, to make it the way he wants it, a person's life as a whole is their responsibility to make it the way they want it. If we guys want to be successful with girls, women, it makes sense for us to have long-term goals for our lives that inspire us and that we are moving toward, no matter how slowly. If we guys do this, we'll get our validation from life rather than girls, women.
For example, let's say there is a guy who is a Video-Game Designer for a Large Company, it was easy for him to allow his life to get into a rut. Day after Day he'd go to work, design, program, come home, watch TV, and go to Bed. He had no goals, no direction. He became passive with his life and, not surprisingly, with women, girls. He blamed his company for his lack of employment of his job, and blamed women for his lack of a love, relationship, dating, sex life. His future looked like it would be just his past. He looked to women for validation in his life, because he couldn't find it anywhere else, and when they didn't validate him, he became depressed. Thus the cycle got worse: The more depressed he became, the more he wanted women to make him feel validated, and predictably, the less attractive he became. The less attractive he became, the fewer women validated him and the more depresed he got.
This was the state he was in when he came into when he was seeking advice, complaining about his lack of success with girls, women. The advice he was given was that he has to set goals for his life. He was told he had to go to a local bookstore and get a book on goal-setting, and got him to really look at what he wanted his life to be like in 10 years, five years, one year. He also was told to write down goals that inspired him, and to put them into his date book where he'd see them often. As he began to get excited about what was possible for him in his life, the cycle began to break apart. He started getting his validation from his life, rather than girls, women.
This made him more attractive to women. Rather than wanting to have a girlfriend so he could have a life, he began having a life that validated him, whether girls, women were in it or not. Naturally, women, girls, were intrigued by his passion for his life, and wanted to be a part of it. He also had to make more male friends, guys have to be extroverts, if they have little or no friends, they are screwed, if a girl is that way, introverted, she won't be screwed.
Because his male friendships were able to validate him without putting down his sexuality or showing him that he was undesirable. He found he could get a kind of support from men, guys, he could never get from women he desired who insisted on being just "friends". This validated him and made women's, girl's reactions to his approach less disturbing.
Women, girls are attracted to guys, men who have passion and fire for their lives. They aren't any more interested in prodiving guys, men, the validation for their lives than you are for theirs(that I disagree with, most guys, men, don't care, we are proud to make women, girls feel happy). When a guy, man has goals, male friends, and a life that inspires him, he'll be validated by what he is up to, and women, girls will want to be a part of his life.
If a guy's life is lonely and meaningless, that makes a guy look desperate, needy, clingy, insecure. A guy has to have something he is into, that gives his life meaning, above and beyond dating, relationships, love, sex. If a guy is trying to get meaning for his life out of interactions with girls, women, they will always notice it and reject him instantly, be repulsed by it. Guys too, won't respect that guy.
I understand, already know why girls, women are attracted to rich guys, because subconsciously, women, girls, want a provider for her and her potentially future kids, i don't blame them for that, but girls, women, are attracted to guys, men who are successful in life and many of these guys, men, are not rich themselves, don't have money.
Here it is, girls, women, are attracted to, like successful guys. It is true they are attracted to money but that is not the whole story. They are attracted to guys who are passionate about their lives and have fire and drive. Some of these guys have money, some of them don't. Money is less important than being a dynamic guy, man, tackling his life head-on. We've all seen the garage-band guitarists who are able to get dates and girlfriends, hook-ups, sex easily, eventhough they never play anywhere except but in local bars. Their passion for something in their lives makes both these kinds of guys, the guys with money and the guitarists, more attractive to girls, women.
Along with passion, women, girls are very attracted to guys who have deep social connections. In essense, girls are attracted to guys who have social-status, which means a guy has plenty of friends, both guys and girls, is very outgoing, is frequently participating in social activities and is involved in several different social-circles.
See all the work we guys have to do?

Girls, Women, don't have to do this.
Click to expand...
well, I agree with you.
 
Honestly it doesn't matter what age you are when you find that person. Or when you start going on dates. I've been on like 1 official date and I'm 30yrs old. As a female I take the initiative if I feel like I like someone. But often it doesn't work out for this reason or that but heck I tried and to me that is all that matters because in the end all that practice helps. Personally I think saying that we have it easier as Girls is BS. We just don't do it the same way Guys do.
 
Dating is just difficult. For everybody.
Yes, it's hard us for guys to make the first move, but I honestly pity women for having to deal with dishonest men, lying about who they are.

Which leads me to The Advantages of Dating an Aspie #1. We're pretty much cut and dry. What you see is what you get, in regards to who we are as a person (does not include all the random pools of knowledge ie memorized lists of European Bulb variety flowers)

Which leads us to reason #2. We actually have passion for things other than ourselves.

and #3 Our detailed memory which allows for cheesy sentimentalities and never forgetting important dates.

These are the primary reasons why I step up to the plate every time. Even if I strike out, I do so without regret. I can live with losing. I cannot knowing I was too chicken to try.
 
It pisses me off, I hate how it always has to come down to a guy's social-skills, conversation-skills, he has to have the right attitude, mindset, mentality, way of thinking, body-language, he has to walk right, sit right, stand right, breathe right, think right, talk right, he has to have confidence, a positive attitude and mindset, outlook on life, be fun, interesting to be around, we have to be outgoing, overall, i believe this one person summed it up perfectly by saying "the way dating and relationships work, attraction works is that every woman is useful but only the best men are required, so be one of them"
 
popculturegeeknerd06 said:
It pisses me off, I hate how it always has to come down to a guy's social-skills, conversation-skills, he has to have the right attitude, mindset, mentality, way of thinking, body-language, he has to walk right, sit right, stand right, breathe right, think right, talk right, he has to have confidence, a positive attitude and mindset, outlook on life, be fun, interesting to be around, we have to be outgoing, overall, i believe this one person summed it up perfectly by saying "the way dating and relationships work, attraction works is that every woman is useful but only the best men are required, so be one of them"
Click to expand...

Omegas don't get to reproduce, law of nature. Anger is a good preworkout... you could join a gym.
 
popculturegeeknerd06 said:
It pisses me off, I hate how it always has to come down to a guy's social-skills, conversation-skills, he has to have the right attitude, mindset, mentality, way of thinking, body-language, he has to walk right, sit right, stand right, breathe right, think right, talk right, he has to have confidence, a positive attitude and mindset, outlook on life, be fun, interesting to be around, we have to be outgoing, overall, i believe this one person summed it up perfectly by saying "the way dating and relationships work, attraction works is that every woman is useful but only the best men are required, so be one of them"
Click to expand...

I disagree with you. I mean if that is true and maybe for some people it is true would you really want someone who wants you to be that perfect? Who wants you to be that constantly or do you want someone who wants you for you? I personally want someone someday, and that person needs to want me for me. It comes down to everyone's social skills eventually but you have to be you and let the rest take care of itself.
 
popculturegeeknerd06 said:
It pisses me off, I hate how it always has to come down to a guy's social-skills, conversation-skills, he has to have the right attitude, mindset, mentality, way of thinking, body-language, he has to walk right, sit right, stand right, breathe right, think right, talk right, he has to have confidence, a positive attitude and mindset, outlook on life, be fun, interesting to be around, we have to be outgoing, overall, i believe this one person summed it up perfectly by saying "the way dating and relationships work, attraction works is that every woman is useful but only the best men are required, so be one of them"
Click to expand...

I really hate to agree with you but I agree with about HALF of that idea. A man being the strongest, most confident, funniest, and interesting definetly isnt a must for a guy to get a girl. But yes, it obviously helps a lot. My sophomore, junior, and senior year in high school I was very succesful, socially. But my freshman year? That was a year of isolation, observation, learning, and depression. There was about 175 students in my entire school, about 60 in my high school, and 12 in my class. It made it easier for me to learn what makes someone popular and an "Alpha-male". At the beginning of my sophomore year I started to apply what I learned and it actually had a fairly large effect.

I started to change my appearance and how I dressed along with how I acted entirely. Instead of me saying, "Hey, can you please hand me that book?" I would say "Give me that book." Football practice changed from an activity of me bettering myself at the game, into a 3 hour session of me intentionally trying to injure anyone that the other top players deemed to be "unworthy of the helmet". We would get into groups of 8 people and literally pick up peoples trucks and move them into the street just to show that we ruled the high school and the football field. Weekend parties my freshman year were a time to cut loose, get drunk, and socialize. Weekend parties my sophomore year were a time for all the "Top-Dogs" to seperate who they wanted and who the didnt, and I regretfully say I was one of those terrible people.

How you're talking sounds like you want to become what I just told you. I've tried it and it makes you feel like a terrible person even after its over, just dont try becoming anything your not. I started changing just to fit in and it got way out of hand. I've been out of high school now for two years and Im doing great socially, but in a much healthier way. I've got a lot of good friends as opposed to the douchebags I used to spend all my time with. I've got a great job. College classes are going uh... decently haha and all from just being my true self.

Morale of this story: If you try becoming a different guy you'll become a much, much, much different person. I tried changing from a shy and quiet student into someone popular... and I just turned into a classic Grade-A Douche.
 
popculturegeeknerd06 said:
us guys have to have a passion for something in life, but girls do not.
Click to expand...

Im not sure if thats right. I dont know if girls need something to be passionate about, but I sure know a lot of girls that are very passionate about things. Just from the people on here, Arashi loves dolls, Dizzy is very educated on psychology, epath is great with music, and Kasmanaft... not sure. Kas kind of seems like a jack-of-all-trades to me.
 
2010Dolby said:
Im not sure if thats right. I dont know if girls need something to be passionate about, but I sure know a lot of girls that are very passionate about things. Just from the people on here, Arashi loves dolls, Dizzy is very educated on psychology, epath is great with music, and Kasmanaft... not sure. Kas kind of seems like a jack-of-all-trades to me.
Click to expand...

Oh, and those are all girls (to help prove my point)
 
2010Dolby said:
Oh, and those are all girls (to help prove my point)
Click to expand...

Dolby is right. Girls can be passionate bout things it just may not be the same thing that guys are passaionate about or they might be the same thing. Dolby is right I am horribly passionate about dollies. I love them, I love talking about them, I love to go places and bring them or go to dollie meets...yah I think passionate sums it up. But that's not the only thing I am passionate about. So maybe its more of finding girls that are passionate about the same things you are

Dolby thanks for the nod glad I could help with your point :).

.
 
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