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Where do you find friends online?

As the title suggests, I've been struggling on where to look to make new friends online, I am super super shy and introverted but I also love socialising at the same time.

I like my own space every so often but I also need to play games with others, it's an odd thing I know, when I was younger meeting people to play games with online seemed a lot easier than it is now, these days I look for places to find other gamers but it's hard to find the.. right people, a majority of people I run into are a little too loud for me, too energetic, very 'lololol' type of humour which is fine in general, but isn't really for me if it's non stop, I like a good laugh and everything but not 24/7 non stop, I would like people I can really chill and play games with at a slower pace, I also struggle to find people who are into the same types of games as me, I tend to like games such as Valheim, Raft, Final Fantasy XIV, The Forest, 7 Days to Die, quite a bit of variety with lots of others too, but I've struggled to find many to have these adventures with these days, I'm not sure if it's because a lot of the people my age nowadays have families and everything (I'm 32) it seems like a lot of people are far more busy than they used to be, my entire life is online so I don't really have anything else going on, I just purely would like to meet more friendly gamers as I feel super lonely all the time, I am probably one of the most down to earth people you'll ever meet, my biggest flaw is simply that I am just extremely shy and I can socially burn out every so often so need breaks, I'm also very bad at initiating a conversation, I prefer someone to pop up in a message to me first if it's a 1 on 1 chat, or have a group chat where I can say 'anyone want to join?' - I simply am very bad at 1 on 1 asking people to play things as I hate putting people on the spot directly, I always feel guilty asking in case they aren't up to it but don't want to say no directly.

I also think this year I want to start aiming at making more 'general' friends too, not necessarily gamers but perhaps some autistic friends would be nice so I have a few people I can talk to about and relate with, there's a lot of growing I want to do this year in myself and putting myself out there more, I'm just trying to find the right places to do so (This site has always been nice for me for one)

Anyway thanks for reading, writing these posts always helps me out a little bit mentally :)


I might be going off on a tangent with this comment, but your post really resonated with me :D I recently separated from my long-time girlfriend, and have been super lonely and looking to make more friends in real life. Even trying to find friends online has been a struggle. It feels like after the COVID pandemic my mind was completely rewired... It's like I forgot how to socialize now :cry:

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