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How The Psychedelic Furs Have Helped Me

Since I'm now posting blogs on here and not on Tumblr anymore, this article will be a very personal and probably even an emotional one. And it includes a favorite band of mine, The Psychedelic Furs.

When I used to write on Tumblr, I never talked about my personal life and the struggles I have with my Autistic Spectrum Disorder. Only my life around music. But since I'm writing articles on here now, I can gladly and openly talk about my Autism without being criticized or looked down on.

On one of my old Tumblr articles called Psychedelic Furs Appreciation Post (you can find it here on my blog Beautiful Chaos) I talked about my life before and after The Furs, my appreciation for them, and was a short but sweet article. But on this article I want to talk about how The Psychedelic Furs helped me with their music and made me become a better person. I had been wanting to write this recently since joining here.

First I want to talk about my life before I discovered The Psychedelic Furs' music.

Having and dealing with Autistic Spectrum Disorder is really not easy. I was first diagnosed when I was two years old, and I really struggled with it in my teens and early twenties. Another thing too I have to struggle and deal with is my stuttering problem. I started stuttering when I was seven years old and I still have it. I went to speech therapy when I was 17, but I still struggle with it, even today.

Having those issues made me feel not good enough. I felt ordinary, stupid, weird, and even at times I felt like I'm not a likeable person. I didn't really see any good thing about me and I even disliked myself.

In my teens I started becoming obsessed with music (I listened to music before but got really obsessed with it later), especially 80s music, like The Smiths, Kate Bush, Pat Benatar, Howard Jones, etc. and I really loved Green Day too (I still do after all these years). But there was one band that really changed my life, and that band was The Psychedelic Furs.

Sure, I wasn't alive in the 1980s when they were popular but growing up I heard a few of their songs being played by my parents and I really liked those songs. I remember when I first heard The Furs' song "Love My Way" a decade ago, I was blown away by the music. It sounded so awesome, so '80s, and just epic, imaginative, and majestic.

In my late teens to early twenties I had their songs "Love My Way," "Sister Europe," and "The Ghost In You" (my parents' favorite song) on my iPod and even had those songs on a CD I made. But three years ago I thought about them and decided to listen to their other songs. I bought a greatest hits CD on Amazon, and after two times of listening to the whole CD, I became a new fan right away. Just like that.
And eventually I got all of their studio albums.

Having become a fan, it never entered my mind how I would see Psychedelic Furs in concert one day. On July 2015, I was on Twitter and there was a tweet that someone wrote saying that they were going to perform in Portland, Oregon on September 2 (I'm an hour away from Portland). I was freaking excited, blown away, and I told my mom about it and she bought the tickets as my birthday present (My brother started liking their music too so went with me). I cried about it three times. First time was when the tickets were officially bought; the second time was seeing recent photos of them performing and it made me realize how I was really going to see them; and the third time was after the concert.

Seeing The Psychedelic Furs for the first time was magic. It was amazing, and I remember I screamed loudly when vocalist Richard Butler came on stage. It was so awesome seeing him in person. The one with that voice.

After the concert I really wanted to see them again and hoped they would come back to Portland. On April 2016 they announced their Summer tour and to my delight Portland was included on July 26. That was my second concert, and then this year on July 22, I saw them the third time. The last two concerts had special moments connected to them.

On the day of the second concert I met guitarist Rich Good. I was really nervous and shy, but he was so nice and gave me a guitar pick. During the second concert Richard Butler shook my hand four times. I remember when he first shook my hand I looked at my brother with a big smile on my face. But the moment I totally didn't expect would happen was during a song Richard Butler held my hand and was singing to me! I looked at him smiling excitedly, and when he was starting to go I remember I yelled hi to him. And then Richard's brother and bassist Tim Butler sang right back at me a few times, and one point when I was taking photos of Tim he noticed and was looking at me while I was taking them. During that time he came close to me and I yelled hi to him too. They were awesome moments.

At those three concerts, especially the second one, I forgot about my struggles, my fears, and my worries. I never wanted it to end, I just wanted that happiness to keep going forever. But eventually, things have to come to an end, and after the second concert I broke down in tears. I was happy and sad at the same time. Happy because I saw them again and those precious moments that happened, and sad because it was over and I already missed them so much.

At the places The Furs performed, I still have trouble with the crowds, but it was so worth it and I would do anything for the band. At the third concert last July while waiting in line a man and woman who were about in their 40s noticed my shirt (I was wearing The Furs' 2016 tour shirt which had the dates on the back of it) and asked me which show I attended. I answered them and we just started talking about The Furs, and I actually really enjoyed it. When I'm around people I get really shy and have trouble making eye contact with them and also if I had to talk to them I would stutter big time, but when I talked to those people, I forgot about my shyness, looked at them in the eye, and I didn't stutter much. I told the people how that concert would be my third show, how my parents saw them live in 1987, how I loved The Furs more than The Smiths, and told them about my appreciation for The Furs. One guy said that he first saw The Furs live back in 1984. I had so much fun talking about my favorite band to them.

Seeing The Psychedelic Furs three times is an achievement to me. But there's one achievement I still think about to this day. At the third concert I was able to give them a letter.

Well, I didn't exactly give it to them. Before The Furs came on stage I tried to throw my letter on the stage (me and my brother sat in the balcony) but I saw it floating down to the bottom floor and I thought it landed there.

But I was wrong.

After the concert me and my brother went out of the building and we met Rich Good again. Rich actually remembered me and said my name! He pulled something out of his jacket pocket and he said he had found my letter. He was holding it! He told me he found it by the key pedals for his guitar and he said that my letter was really lovely and it made him tear up. I really couldn't believe it, I started crying happy tears and Rich hugged and comforted me. After that we talked for a little bit and he gave me another guitar pick. He was so sweet and I'll never forget his kindness to me. I still can't believe he found my letter, and it gives me a comforting feeling to know that Richard Butler and the other band members saw it too.

I follow The Furs on Twitter, and they liked my tweets to them 16 times. After them seeing my tweets and my letter, I feel like they know who I am now. I love talking about The Psychedelic Furs on my Twitter and Instagram, and whenever I would see a tweet mentioning them, I get excited and happy.

The Psychedelic Furs are the only band that changed my life. Their music made me become a better person, and most importantly they made me feel better about myself. Seeing them three times, meeting Rich Good two times, me giving them my letter are my greatest rewards. Me being a Psychedelic Furs fan is the only thing that's interesting about me. They have helped me so much and this article is dedicated to them.

Even though I still struggle with my Autism and my stuttering, I don't feel weird and ordinary anymore. I feel better now being myself, and it's all thanks to my favorite band, The Psychedelic Furs. Thank you Psychedelic Furs so much, with all my heart...

"Let it stay forever now."


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