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Leia’s Autism Diary

Lilacleia16
1 min read
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433
Personal
Has anyone else had an experience using noise canceling headphones at church? I could still hear everything but it didn’t annoy my ears and it wasn’t sharp like knives into my eardrums. I had to lean in to hear the pastor preach but that was fine. He was kind enough to give a disclaimer so that...
Lilacleia16
1 min read
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397
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3
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4
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Does anyone else seem to have a turtle trail that they follow. By that I mean a radius of familiar places that you frequent regularly. I do. Everyday I check the mail and everyday I find an excuse to go a block away to the grocery store. I go to church which is two trolley stops away every...
Lilacleia16
3 min read
Views
414
Personal
Touch- Sight= People vibrate as colors. It’s like an aura but I feel it instead of see it. Each nationality vibrates as a different color than their skin tone. Native Americans vibrate as yellow variations even though their skin is red. Black people vibrate as red variations even though their...
Lilacleia16
1 min read
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304
General
TABLE OF SYNESTHESIA TYPES (by combinations of senses) Basically, synesthesia is the combining of two senses out of the five. There are ten types as follows: 1. Touch-Sight=Feeling touch when watching fights. Feeling people as colors. 2. Touch-Sound=Feeling sounds on skin/ dancing in shapes to...
Lilacleia16
1 min read
Views
340
Comments
1
Personal
I decided to watch church online. I kept shutting down during the service and it was all I could do to stare straight at the pastor and hold onto my seat. You see, there were too many kinds of hands giving me handshakes, too many different smells when I got hugged, and boy was it loud during the...
Lilacleia16
1 min read
Views
393
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1
General
Lately I notice that I struggle to find the right words to describe something. For example, I couldn’t think of the word broth for thirty minutes and I was like you know the soup water…you know the sauce…my autism specialist thinks a speech therapist would be able to help me but I think it’s...
Lilacleia16
2 min read
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2K
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2
Personal
Identity-first language says, “I am autistic.” Person-first language says, “I am a person who has autism.” I prefer identity-first language because it invites culture. Person-first language causes shame about one’s disability. Autism is not like an addiction to be shamefully recovered from. It...
Lilacleia16
1 min read
Views
348
Personal
Tonight I went to the ladies conference and there were traveling stage lights and a loud speaker system and a very large crowd and I just kind of froze. I went into a trance. People kept asking me if I was ok and it was so embarrassing. It felt like being on a rollercoaster and wanting to puke...
Lilacleia16
3 min read
Views
330
Personal
Maslow’s hierarchy I feel that some people focus on aesthetics and want a lot of money to create the perfect look for themselves or their home. Some people seek fame because they have a deep need for esteem and found their talents and honed them to get recognition. Some people focus on...
Lilacleia16
1 min read
Views
305
Personal
I can sense aura colors and feel the vibe of a person with my heart field and know things about their personality. The sun lights up my chakras and I can feel energy being channeled through me. I feel the warmth of God like a whirlwind of light that picks my spirit up like sand. I can feel...
Lilacleia16
1 min read
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889
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2
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2-12-24 I didn’t know I couldn’t read facial expressions because I thought all there were was happy, sad, surprised and angry. Happy being turned up lips. Sad being turned down lips. Surprise being an open mouth. And angry being eyebrows down. I realized I didn’t understand when I was on the...
Lilacleia16
1 min read
Views
367
Personal
2-11-24 I feel like I live in a world without people in it. I have people I talk to online like in this forum and my online boyfriend and acquaintances at church but no real friends. I only have my mother and we only talk on the phone. I get SSI for autism because of it being a disability so I...
Lilacleia16
2 min read
Views
286
Personal
A. Verbal stims: 1. Tap a pen 2. Swing my legs 3. Rock while standing from one leg to the other 4. Make groans or sighs a lot 5. Humming to myself til I got made fun of for it in school 6. Making bird noises very loudly like I am talking to the birds 7. Yelling at inanimate objects 8. Fake...
Lilacleia16
2 min read
Views
361
Personal
2-11-24 What’s your score on the test below? Mine is 204 out of 240. Free Neurodivergent Test The DSM V defines autism. I'll summarize: -Deficits in social interaction and communication -Deficits in making or reading nonverbal cues and behavior -Difficulty maintaining relationships...
Lilacleia16
3 min read
Views
764
Reaction score
1
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2
Personal
How do you see the world as an autistic person? There are 5 options and they are each governed by one of the five senses. Explain your perspective. 1. Stereovision 2. Vibration vision 3. Picture vision 4. Smell pictures 5. Taste visualizations I'll go first: Temple Grandin described picture...
Lilacleia16
4 min read
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1K
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1
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7
Personal
2-9-24 One of my therapists (that’s actually not the autism specialist) has a lot to say about my autism. But not all of it is helpful. He links taking a shower or not taking a shower being due to no sense of external control. This translates to me as will. It’s not a matter of the will though...
Lilacleia16
1 min read
Views
359
Comments
2
Personal
Does anyone else count your steps as you are walking?
Lilacleia16
2 min read
Views
272
Personal
There’s so many smells. So many of them are bad. The rain in the city by the harbor smells like fish and car exhaust. It’s not like the rain in the country that smells fresh and clean. The hallways in my apartment complex smell like the perfume and disinfectant of cleaning products. The worst is...
Lilacleia16
1 min read
Views
263
Personal
My special interest is personality tests and I have another account on Personality Cafe with all the tests I created. https://www.personalitycafe.com/members/lilacleia16.573046/ That’s my profile if you want to add me, and here are the tests...
Lilacleia16
1 min read
Views
268
Personal
I’m learning to plan my days with a better internal locus of control by giving myself options then asking Ziggy (aka Alexa) to pick a number to decide which option I pick. Here are the options: Sunny Day Plans: 1. Rollerskate 2. Basketball 3. Long walk Rainy Day Plans: 1. Draw 2. Write a poem...

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