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Asperger's & Autism Forum
Hello everyone. I am a 33 y/o Female NT recently in a 4 month relationship with a 33 y/o Male AS. It started out very full on, after 3 weeks he told me he was madly in love with me and shortly after said he was gonna marry me one day and that I was his everything. We were even planning on moving in together after around 9 months of being together. We talked weddings and future children and him being the stepdad to my daughter.
Everything was great until I started bringing to his attention that the lack of affection (which was really none at all) was bothering me. He said he would try harder but it never happened so I brought it up again. That time he noticeably was getting annoyed and tried to turn it around on me saying I was too needy, he was not nice about it.
Shortly after that he got very frustrated with me when I accused him of only wanting to see me when he needed his laundry done and needed a ride to the store. Things went very quickly down hill from there and long...
For as long as I can remember, I've always put extreme restrictions on myself when it comes to interests. It's very strange. For instance, I go through phases of obsessing over each one of my interests, and while I'm obsessing over one thing, I can't allow myself to enjoy any of the other interests. I put pressure on myself to choose a favorite interest to focus on permanently because changing from one obsession to the next is emotionally draining and very stressful for me. I want to just settle on one interest and focus on it forever, but I just can't bring myself to choose one, and I'm simply unable to choose more than one. This is a very hard thing to explain, but is this common in people on the autism spectrum? Could it possibly be linked to OCD? I don't understand it, and it really bothers me.
Thanks in advance to anyone who reads/replies; any help is greatly appreciated.
Another musical thread. This is half an autism spectrum thread, half an off-topic thread.
For as long as I can remember, songs have been really, really "sticky" for me. All I have to do is hear a song once, whether it's the first time or the hundredth time, and the next thing I know, the lyrics I can remember or the tune alone starts playing on repeat on my head. The only real way to "remedy" it is either listening to the radio at the same time so that my mind can no longer pick up the tune correctly or "singing" the lyrics and matching tune to a completely different song until it replaces it. For me, this is both a gift and a curse; sometimes it's a good or catchy song I get stuck on my head, other times, it's one that makes me want to never listen to music again or one that puts me in a really depressed mood for a while and make me feel like I'm going to cry at every given moment for no real reason.
I can't tell you a single day in my life where some song wasn't stuck in my...
How many of you are bisexual or bicurious? I am bisexual, but only 2 people know (I've told my partner in the past but he thought I was joking... so he isn't one of the two). Because I'm in a long term relationship its not really something that I've needed to discuss with anyone, nor been able to explore.
Here's the conversation:
Girlfriend walks into room without knocking as I'm dressing. I grab a blanket off the bed to cover me and I blurt out, "Hey! Don't gaze at my nude form!!"
Her: "Honey, that's weird. No one talks like that."
Me: "What do you mean?"
Her: "People don't say "nude form" and stuff like that."
So my question is, do any of you have this issue? I read that some aspies talk different or something like that? I'm kinda confused.
I am a NT who dated an aspie for several years. The relationship ended suddenly and with no explanation. This question is for those of you who have had a "love interest" as one of your special interests. (I don't mean having a crush on someone..I am interested in those of you who actually dated your love interest.) How long was this interest able to really capture your attention before it got old/boring (6 months, a year, still together)? And if you ended the relationship, was there something in particular that happened to make you lose interest (i.e. another hobby, a new love interest)? Thanks for your responses and I am sure I will have more questions based on your responses!
I've always had an interest in license plates.
Here in Canada (and I think the United States) the license plate always stays with the owner of the vehicle, unlike Great Britain and Europe where it stays with the car, if anyone even followed that and there is a reason for that pre-amble.
Even as I'm driving, or scanning the parking lot at work, etc... I can identify which license plates are the most recent just by the letter/number pattern, possibly indicating a new driver or possibly just a brand new purchase. And it is something I almost always tend to glance at wherever I go.
At classic car shows which I frequent, if I see a car I've never seen before I will look at the license plate, it might indicate if a collector just purchased a new or perhaps just finished a restoration, etc...
And on a different note. Many years ago my province issued plates that had three letters and three numbers, the license plate design hasn't changed, but they now issue plates with four letters...
I've read articles that some people can remember all the way back to birth.
Science tells us our brains don't have that capacity and anything before three years old would be almost impossible. That is the age most people I've talked with say also. No earlier than 3 or 4 yrs. really.
I can remember vividly things that do go back to my birth. First memory: Laying on my back scratching my face with my hands in incubator. They put extra long sleeves on me in the hospital and tied the ends so I couldn't scratch at my face. I remember being on the hospital bed with my Mom when she got up to go to the bathroom and the nurse telling her never leave a newborn unattended like that, not even to go to the bathroom. I remember the nurse putting me and Mom into the car to go home. A couple they knew, came to pick us up. Dad was in the back seat. Me and Mom sat up front with Charlie, the driver. His wife and Dad in the back seat. Charlie reached for me and handed me over the seat to...
I'll keep this short; aside from my relationship with my mother and brother, I don't know if or when I've felt "love" towards someone.
I've had dating relationships in the past, and they all ended very nicely, no one was mad at the end. But I think that's because I don't know how to feel or care for the other person.
Is this an Asperger's trait? What causes it? I'm in my 30's and was diagnosed in my 20's, and I'm a woman.
I just don't know if I've ever felt anything for anyone, and I've known a lot of nice guys and nice people. I'm getting concerned because I want to get married, but I don't know what's going on! And I've met another great guy!
How does one become emotionally invested?
I have noticed that when I meet people, they can immediately tell that I am not an NT and that there is something "weird" about me, and they treat me accordingly.
People will carry on normal conversations with my mum, but once I am part of the equation they get very uncomfortable and often rude. People stare at me and give dirty looks frequently. I am often a recipient of nasty comments.
I try very hard to come across as a regular person and not be awkward but people can always tell.
I am not sure if people can tell I'm on the spectrum or another possibility is that they can tell I am gay. Either way I am really offended by the way they treat me.
Has anyone else had this experience?
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