Why All The Love?

[Riley]

I'm truly the worst person you could ever meet in real-life. I make jokes about tragedies such as shootings. I throw massive temper tantrums that could count in the abusive territory. I try to manipulate people. I've recently taken up victim-blaming; ESPECIALLY if the person in question is on the Autism spectrum. Yes, I even often hate what I am.

So Why do people like me? Just because I don't go through with what I threaten doesn't mean I'm 'good inside.' My old teachers thought I was charming and still love me. I feel like I should tell them their little darling is an awful human being.
Not to mention my Mom and Aunt. They see good in me. I don't.

I'm not good...I'm not nice...I'm...

 

[midlife aspie]

......fishing for opinions. I suspect your youth has something to do with it. People are not so accepting of such stuff from middle aged folks.

 

[Riley]

Is that a good or bad things?

 

[Nitro]

Have you ever considered trying to be the person you would want as a friend instead of an enemy?

 

[Riley]

I've been lightly trying. Sadly, my attempts fail if they're directed at one of my nieces.

 

[Nitro]

Well consider it this way,what if the shoe was on the other foot? How would you feel?

 

[midlife aspie]

Have you ever considered trying to be the person you would want as a friend instead of an enemy?

This is good. It does look as though she is engaged in the necessary self-reflection.

 

[midlife aspie]

Given your age, it is very good that you are identifying your issues. Once you understand them, you can defeat them. A truly awful person would be less inclined to reflect on him/herself in such a way.

 

[twilightzone76]

......looking for attention in the wrong ways??

 

[twilightzone76]

Well consider it this way,what if the shoe was on the other foot? How would you feel?

That would take that big "E" word that seems to be a long lost cousin for Aspies though.....

 

[Nitro]

That would take that big "E" word that seems to be a long lost cousin for Aspies though.....

empathy?

 

[twilightzone76]

empathy?

That's the one!

 

[Nitro]

That's the one!

It can be learned,but it can't be taught

 

[midlife aspie]

I think this is just 'that stage' of youth that presents in so many kids in the form of rebelliousness. I personally can make allowances for someone in the age bracket of the OP. I cannot do the same for someone 18+.

 

[Nitro]

I think this is just 'that stage' of youth that presents in so many kids in the form of rebelliousness. I personally can make allowances for someone in the age bracket of the OP. I cannot do the same for someone 18+.

I believe angst is the word that best describes that.

 

[twilightzone76]

It can be learned,but it can't be taught

I'm skeptical that it can be either learned or taught. If it was that easy, many relationships would have been saved.

 

[Nitro]

I'm skeptical that it can be either learned or taught. If it was that easy, many relationships would have been saved.

From what I understand about it is that we don't lack it,we just have trouble displaying it.

 

[Nitro]

Scripting dialog for small talk is the beginning of it. Learning to hold some information and nasty feelings back is also a part of it.

If you snap at somebody,you should expect them to not take it favorably.

It's not impossible to learn cause and effect

 

[Kari Suttle]

I'm truly the worst person you could ever meet in real-life. I make jokes about tragedies such as shootings. I throw massive temper tantrums that could count in the abusive territory. I try to manipulate people. I've recently taken up victim-blaming; ESPECIALLY if the person in question is on the Autism spectrum. Yes, I even often hate what I am.

So Why do people like me? Just because I don't go through with what I threaten doesn't mean I'm 'good inside.' My old teachers thought I was charming and still love me. I feel like I should tell them their little darling is an awful human being.
Not to mention my Mom and Aunt. They see good in me. I don't.

I'm not good...I'm not nice...I'm...

Its good that you're recognizing these issues now and acknowledging them. I know a middle aged adult or two who behave similarly and are very immature in that they won't even acknowledge their poor behavior. Do you know why you behave this way, though? Are you fishing for opinions, or fishing for ways to improve behaviors you find to be negative? I'm not quite sure based on your original post. If you truly are this unhappy with yourself, then perhaps some introspection can help.

Given your age, it is very good that you are identifying your issues. Once you understand them, you can defeat them. A truly awful person would be less inclined to reflect on him/herself in such a way.

Agreed on all points.

 

[xDominiel]

That would take that big "E" word that seems to be a long lost cousin for Aspies though.....

And even more so for NTs.....

I hate when people imply this. I never lacked empathy. I just had trouble conveying.